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Cake is apparently NOT a lie. Cake is delicious and thus... you must eat it. The meme originated from Super Mario 64, where the final reward for weeks of you wasted life was the Princess deciding to "make a Delicious Cake. For Mario!" moar like a delicious sammich amirite?

Since time immemorial, people have wanted to have their cake and eat it too. Oh, but if only life was that simple. Unfortunately, there always seems to be something or someone trying to prevent you from getting your hands on delicious cake and eating it. It is at times like these that one must go to extraordinary measures to get at that delicious cake you so crave.

Fortunately, the scientists, mathematicians, engineers, physicists and metaphysicists at 4chan are working around-the-clock posing every conceivable hypothetical situation one might find oneself in, vis-à-vis delicious cake, and the ultimate prize– enjoying said deliciousness. If you want to know: "how can I haz caek?" - this is the answer.

From Encyclopedia Dramatica's endless supply of factoids:

• ... that you should suggest something for DYK?
• ... that a Japanese cook cooked his own cock?
• ... that Facebook was never worth $38 a share?
• ... that the end of the world was officially called off sometime last Thursday?
• ... that China is making "stamina" pills by grinding up dead babies into a fine powder? (See also: Foetus soup.)
• ... that the director of Kony 2012 has been arrested for masturbating in public?
• ... that George Zimmerman has been charged with murder?
• ... that Friendship is Magic?

• The Legend of Korra
• Robert Wayne Stiles
• I Can Count To Potato
• w0rmer
• Trayvon Martin
• That Really Rustled My Jimmies

• PPPProject
• Judge Rotenberg Center
• SableQueanVilaya
• Tribes Ascend
• Dear Hasbro
• PokeShipping