Amy's Baking Company
|CYBER BULLIES DID ABC|
Amy's Baking Company (ABC), run by Amy and Samy Bouzaglo (yes their names are nearly identical) is a Scottsdale, Arizona based restaurant best known for serving high quality food in a pleasant environment. They are also known for being insane lolcows who appeared in the national media after responding to negative OTI reviews of their restaurant with a torrent of batshit rage, butthurt and sockpuppetry that everyone found hilarious except themselves. Despite being dismissed as "hopeless" by professional kitchen troll Gordon Ramsay, shaming themselves on national TV with an epic display of retardation, and becoming a permanent laughingstock to the general public and the internet, they remain convinced of their righteousness to the present day.
Amy's a psychopathic cat hoarder who enjoys credit card fraud and identity theft, making the world's shittiest reheated pizza and responding to criticism or stress by firing her entire staff and degenerating into an apoplectic pissy fit similar to an unmedicated 12 year old with assburgers. She also claims to have three boys "in cat bodies", whom she most likely ground up into the cakes to either make them taste a level higher than cow shit or from rage.
Samy's a hard-azz drug-slangin' Jew gangsta (srsly) who responds to criticism of his wife's shitty pizza by bragging about his gang connections on national TV, threatening to murder his customers and grinding their bones into Jew bread.
Together, they are Amy's Baking Company. Lulz and IRL flamewarring ensues.
UPDATE: Against all odds, Samy is, apparently, a gang-affiliated Israeli citizen with a history of drug trafficking and extortion and is currently being considered for deportation. The lulz thickens! 
Amy Bossington had a dream. She wanted to open her very own restaurant. Unfortunately, she had no training, and couldn't cook worth shit. This is one woman that you want to stay OUT of your kitchen. Then along came Samy Bouzaglo. For reasons too fucking retarded to list, he decided to fund her stupid dream with his drug money, and the two were later bound forever in ill-advised matrimony. In 2010, Amy's Bullshit Company was born, and didn't do half-bad for a while. But then they decided to turn their bakery into a bistro, and the clusterfuck began.
Gordon Ramsay decided to try his hand at saving this sinking Titanic of a restaurant on his television show, Kitchen Nightmares, in 2013. Needless to say, it didn't go very well. A clip of the episode was posted on Reddit before it was aired, and was later taken down and had its comments disabled following the inevitable shitstorm.
Right off the bat, Amy exposes her craziness to the world by rambling about how haters and bloggers have been trash-talking her business and lying about her food, how she loves her
cats three little boys in cat bodies, and how she knows Ramsay will tell everybody how lovely her food is. They foolishly thought Ramsay was just there to prove those haters wrong and not actually do a fucking show.
And thus begins the downward spiral into chaos. We learn that she thinks that the bun on a salmon burger should be spewing greasy liquids at the slightest touch, that raw pizza dough is "crisp and crunchy", that her husband steals tips from waitresses (which in this case isn't technically illegal because they do pay full-time wages to the staff, but still a douchebag move), that she sells Chef Boyardee ravioli she buys from the grocery store and calls it fresh, and how, like an aspie on deviantArt or a 13-year-old reviewer on YouTube, she and her husband collapse into sputtering fits of insanity at the slightest hint of criticism.
He gets approached by two former employees too, and they tell him that Amy fired at least 50 (it ends up being over 100) staff members in one year, and that Samy had his employees wash his car for him just cause he wanted to and was too cheap to go through an automatic car wash at a Shell station.
Following a second conversation with Amy and Samy that starts off with them "clarifying" a few things with him, namely that the reason some orders MAY have been a little messed up was because Ramsay was distracting Amy by being in the kitchen and disrupting the normal flow of things (even though he spent most of his time out in the dining room, and when offered to go into the kitchen the first day to try the food, he said no), Ramsay decides that he can't help them. He does the only sensible thing shown in this episode, and just walks the fuck away.
Throughout his criticism to them and their restaurant with them actually shutting the fuck up for once, all Amy did was nod and pretty much kept admitting that she was a failure at life and cooking and that she was a lost cause and everything she does just to get Ramsay to leave faster with her bitter and inhuman gaze and attitude, while Samy just sat there looking like his wife was genuinely crazy. Ramsay could've sworn and screamed like he always does, but he actually didn't give them the satisfaction this time. You could see that he wanted to rain hell on them, but they were already destined for good ol' Lucifer anyway, so he decided not to.
Funnily enough, this is probably the calmest Ramsay's ever been on television. And considering he just straight walks out on the restaurant at the end, that's saying something.
Almost straight away after this was aired, Amy's Baking Company's Facebook page exploded. Like the mature, responsible, level-headed adults they are, they figured this was the perfect opportunity for an ALL-CAPS SHIT-FLINGING CONTEST. This went on for several hours, during which time this shit was spread all over Facebook. Way to fix your reputation, guys.
The next day, they claimed their page was hacked.
Ramsay typically revisits the restaurants he profiles on Kitchen Nightmares, with Amy's Baking Company billed as the long awaited season premiere of Kitchen Nightmares USA on April 11th, 2014. It turned out Ramsay has decided NOT to step foot to the restaurant again, and instead shows extra footage of his visit last year. So yeah, same shit, different footage, more proof that the duo are demons in disguise. They even tried to profit off of their infamy as much as they could by selling shirts with quotes from that episode. such as "I'm the GANGSTER" and "Here's your pizza, go fuck yourself", etc; even more proof of their delusion that they think this is going to be a big business boom.
Your Typical Yelp Reviews
Almost immediately, they started receiving negative reviews on Yelp, much to the butthurt of Amy. The reviews cited piss-poor service and lousy food with ingredients that taste like shit together, on top of the rude behavior of the managers. Amy and her husband decided that the only way to fix this problem was to maturely respond to the negative criticisms by logging onto Yelp and insulting people in a five-star review of their own restaurant with made-up sockpuppet accounts to balance out the review score, which is why it has a 3/5 rating on Yelp right now.
This incident was later picked up by the local news, who wrote an article about it on their site.
Professional critics on the "food"
Yelp isn't the only place that Amy's left a bad taste in their mouths. The Phoenix Business Journal foolishly sent their food critics there on opening night. They had the bouncers kick everyone else out but the critics, then the critics were kicked out for finding flies in their drinks... three times.
Amy and Samy have learned exactly zero from all this and still have not been committed to an insane asylum. In her active accounts like Twitter and Facebook, Amy is still talking shit behind Ramsay's back, and harassing Ramsay and company about airing the episode. They say that Ramsay is lying about them and don't know the truth when seeing the two scumbags action and the food on camera is enough truth. In September 2014, TMZ released footage of Samy chasing a terrorist, cleverly disguised as a drunk customer, from his restaurant with a
knife pen... a very large pen that only looks like a knife or hammer that gets wider when you turn it. The guy did comply and leave the store, but Samy, clearly on a murder withdrawal, went after him, eventually backing off anyway when he realized he was getting deported regardless and getting more jail time in the US wouldn't be good for business. On May 21st, ABC re-opened to zero fanfare. Not many lulz ensued, probably due to the fact that they didn't let any media people in, except that their PR firm dumped them and they were threatened with lolsuits from Fox.
But in a surprise twist, it looks like Samy's probably getting his ass sent back to Israel without Amy, who has a felony record. He will be shouting at customers in Tel Aviv while Amy rots in Hell for her pride.
How to piss ABCDEFG off
- Tell them their pizza was store-bought from the local Publix dumpster.
- Give the waitresses, if you see any, a tip in secret.
- Squeeze and pretty much destroy their fragile Blue Ribbon Burgers and make them watch the pool of fluids fill the plate.
- Give them 1-star ratings everywhere you go.
- Document their ALL CAPS Facebook rage for evidence later.
- Pretend to perform an exorcism on the store and the two of them.
- Ask if Amy had been sexually harassed recently.
- Pretend to have a heart attack when Amy looks at you with her soul-eating eyes.
- Bring a bag of cat shit into their store and say to everyone "This is the best thing this restaurant has ever made".
- Mention and explain NEDM to Amy.
- Tell her that she's the only woman that should not be allowed in your kitchen.
- Tell them you've happily added eating her food as a new event in the Pain Olympics.
—Amy calling all Gordon Ramsay fans mules.
- Company Name - Amy's Baking Company
- Address - 7366 East Shea Blvd # 112, Scottsdale, Arizona 85260
- Phone - (480) 607-0677
- Food - Better than Amy's shit.
- Gordon Ramsay - Owned the shit out of Amy on Kitchen Nightmares USA.
- Shit - What they cook and claim is gourmet food.
- Their website
- Their NEW Facebook page.
- - The #1 fanboy of ABC from a Baptist Church.
- - Their NEW Facebook page.
- Their product store
- . Reading her comments from her 'supporters' would make you want to wash your eyes with bleach.
- Their YouTube page
- Their Pinterest page
- Their Google Virtual Tour
- ABC on Yelp. Tell them how much you love their food. May be deleted if they saw it.
- - Know Your Meme on Amy's Baking Company PR Scandal.
- Amy's stupidity now claiming Gordon Ramsay sexually harassed her during filming their May 2013 appearance on Kitchen Nightmares USA!
- PBS gives Amy's Baking Company glowing reviews. Let PBS know the real truth about them.
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