Ableism

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This guy could be President, were it not for you ableist bastards.
This isn't very good

Ableism is the term created to supposedly shame those who assert the belief that disabled people are less capable than normal people. Despite this being demonstrably true, the creators of ableism would much rather sweep these logical differences under the carpet, and usher in a new era of professional footballers with no feet, and CEOs of Fortune 500 companies who can't even count to potato. Ableism is an "-ism", much like racism or sexism, but refers to the differently abled instead of the differently skinned and the differently gendered. One who practices ableism, meaning they are offensive to the disabled, is an ableist.

What the actual fuck is this?

Ableism does not merely refer to those who are outwardly cruel to the crippled and monglike, it can be much more subtle than that. Almost any instruction or general statement made up of words can somehow be called ableist, just as those who mention meat are cruel to vegans, and those who do not fuck their pets are furryist. Naturally, hipsters are drawn like moths to the flame of a hopeless cause, and thus pretend to be deeply affected by the consequences of ableism due to the injustices suffered by their ADD little brother. Fighting for the rights of niggers was old and uninteresting decades ago, and defending fags is quickly going out of style. These righteous crusaders against social inequity needed a new demographic in order to harangue you about a fresh set of plights; thus, the rights for retards movement was born. Apparently, it is now wrong to liken someone who is acting like a retard to an actual retard... so very, very wrong. So, familiarize yourself with the following list, lest you savagely oppress some innocent downie with your cruel, vicious words. You don't want to make these abhumans cry, do you?

Terrible Slurs Against the Differently Abled

Derp

An offensive character

Let’s not lie. “Derp” isn’t even a word – it’s a term that’s pretty much only used on the internet whenever someone screws shit up. The problem that social justice warriors have with this word is that they judged it by searching it on Google images. The results showed image macros of people with cross eyes since – you know, people with their eyes crossed are disabled according to their logic. Due to these macros showing up on Google images, they connected this with people discriminating against those Down’s syndrome.

There is a flaw with this logic. This clearly depicts the hypocrisy of internet social justice – they believe that this provides solid evidence of a usage of an Internet term. Yet they fail to realize how it’s used – it’s more comparable to Homer Simpson’s DOH rather than making fun of people with disabilities. How far social justice warriors go in dissecting a word varies; in the case of “derp”, they barely dissected it and only judged on shallow terms. But let’s get real here, if you can ban a word because of how it’s sometimes abused this would make the word “whale” ableist towards obese people.

To further prove their srs detective skillz, they have concluded that the term “derp” has originated from these macros which make fun of disabled people. Except it didn’t. It originated from the movie Baseketball and was popularized by South Park; both entities were created by the same people.

Most notably, the word "derp" has been labelled as a bigoted slur with the help of the My Little Pony fandom. With Derpy Hooves being acknowledged as a pony with Down's Syndrome in one episode, internet activist Yamino decided to take a stand against a children's TV show and label Lauren Faust as a bigoted hack for the inclusion of the character.

Other Words

Ableists use offensive words to oppress the disabled and wreak havoc upon their tiny little minds. Below is a partial list of terms deemed by lulz experts to be ableist:

  • Lame: Offensive to people without legs or who make the decision to walk, also horse lovers.
  • Retarded: Saying that's retarded is offensive to retards, which is retarded.
  • Mong: The short form of the word 'mongoloid', most commonly used in Britain. Considered offensive to retards, people with Down's Syndrome, finns and the autistic.
  • Moron: Also offensive to tards, as moron is supposed to mean one whose intellectual capacity can never exceed that of an average 12 year old. Formerly an actual medical diagnosis.
  • Dumb: Offensive to the mute, or those who soulbond with the mute.
  • Crazy: Considered ableist because it is oppressive to lunatics.
  • Handicap: Social Justice Sally considers everyone to be handicapable.
  • Whore: Offensive to those suffering from clinical sex addiction. For reals.
  • Special: A strange one, although effectively demanding to be thought of as special little snowflakes who were born lucky enough to not conform to evolution's idea of proficient humans, the differently abled seem to despise this term.
  • Freak: A term used to describe the physically deformed, considered incorrect politically when directed at an individual with an ailment, but not otherwise.
  • Monster: See freak.
  • Disabled: The term disabled is offensive to the disabled. See also Divide by Zero
  • Any Word Ever: Telling someone to listen? Mocking the deaf. Offering someone gum? Halitosis shamer! Your iPhone broken? Fuck you, it can do anything that any other iPhone can do, except actually function. You get the idea, and as such, will never have any problems thinking up a decent trolling strategy, bonus points if you can find the typographical equivalent of communicating s-l-o-w-l-y and LOUDLY..
  • Movement – Yes people are actually stupid enough to declare this ableist. Because people in wheelchairs can't technically move their legs, internet social justice assumes that they will find anything related to movement as offensive.

How Can You Help?

The word "disabled" is ableist.

The mere offer of help to a disabled person is the most offensive thing conceivable, they should be treated like every other person, except you should be extra careful and not mention any words that could be considered ableist. Or make any potentially ableist gestures (pointing, any movement below the waist, any movement below the neck, any facial movements.) Brain functions of any kind are also considered highly ableist. Whilst we are all aware that disability is the divine retribution for past sins from God / karma / Lil B, it is not considered polite to mention this, even outside our ableist shaming circles. Telling someone to man the fuck up and not allow nasty little words to hurt their precious feelings is not acceptable, but it is worth remembering that you're an asshole, and as such there is only so much pandering that can be expected of you.

George Carlin's View on Ableism

See also

External

disabledfeminists.com Don't laugh. They're changing the world.


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