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Description is a web site that hosts a surprisingly popular database of quotes from IRC. It is a spin-off of the original QDB (quote database) on Submitting a quote is sometimes referred to as "bashing". collects, stores and presents humorous (i.e. racist and homophobic) quotes garnered almost exclusively from Internet Relay Chat, although some entries from instant messaging and spoken quotations appear in the database.

Quotes are submitted to through a web form, where they are then kept for moderation. If they are deemed worthy of being in the database (that is, they make sense, they are at least slightly funny, they are not overly long, the quote number is not a prime, and the amount of rain that fell in Krasnoyarsk the previous day is less than 5 cm), the quotes are then placed on public display.

The site's ease of quote submission means that large amounts of quotes are submitted every day, and the number of approved quotes in the database (including those with negative scores) is 20,440 (as of March 10, 2008). is immensely popular among basement dwellers, so much so that the site's maintainers intermittently send out requests for new hardware to be donated (which often occurs).

The topic of the databases quotes are largely "nerd humor," and the comedy value of the database is enhanced if the reader is computer literate. The intended audience of the QDB is people aged 16 and over. Unfortunately, this includes 16-year-old girls who browse the site and feign computer literacy with their LJ friends; quotes may contain any combination of explicit language, adult themes, sexual references and allusions to drug use. This is amply mocked by one quote, according to which you need just mention "masturbation, child pornography, racism, and Dungeons and Dragons", or say "" and your favorite ethnic slur a lot, and the quote will get into the database.

It's a good place to redirect someone to who hasn't read quotes before and wants to know what they might be. For the rest of us, the top quotes remain the same for at least 100 years; still, they're classics. The page is just so alive as it seems in the frontpage.

In July of 2004, the original moderators of went on strike in an attempt to get the management to either develop new features or appoint an individual with that responsibility. After being fired by the management, the senior moderators moved to

Overall, the site provides some lulz, as the site creator is willing to emotionally destroy small children and their artwork.

How to get a quote on

To get a quote on and secure your e-lebrity, just mention these key words or phrases and the Jew will lap them up for their ultimate goal of world domination:


   <loser1>im like so thirsty, i could drink a whole coke
   <loserbeta> huhuhuhu lolz omg
   <loser1>i mean COCK!!! i could drink a whole COCK!!11111
   <loserbeta>loll submitted!1!!
   <loser1> NOOOOOOOESSS!!!!!11!!shiftone!!1
  • Buttsecks
  • Desire for pedo activites
  • Women (with a derogatory reference, as it should be)
  • Rape
  • Include a desire for a quote to be submitted

Hilarious Examples

   <logicalentity> 0111100101101111011101010010000001100001011011000110110000100000011100110110110101100101011011000110110000000000
   <SquallStrife> unmoo! you all smell
   <SquallStrife> logicalentity: thats low, insulting people through binary
   <SquallStrife> i mean its low. literally, its low level :P


   <Rei> What's Microsoft Works?
   <K> An oxymoron.

So epic!

   (omfg): whats the most sensitive part of a persons body when they are masturbating ?
   (TypoKing): idk
   (omfg): their ears
   (omfg): listening for ppl coming home

This shit belongs on ED! I mean it's sooo epic win!

   <Hef> correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't holy water just water that has a prayer said over it?
   <Tribolthree> holy water is water blessed by a priest, nothing special or added -_- technically he could bless the water coming from a pipe
   <Tribolthree> so like you could have a fountain of holy water
   <Hef> the priest would probably get tired of the constant blessing
   <Hef> and run out of mana

Did you see that?? I just fucking came! So epic!

   <Costilled> "Try our new pepperoni pizza!"
   <Costilled> and I'm left thinking
   <Costilled> what's so new about it?
   <Costilled> so I kick the guy in the throat
   <Costilled> and take his wallet
   <Mystech> o.o out
   <Mystech> Or ouch
   <Mystech> depending on how weirdly my brain is functioning tonight.
   * karass has joined #jack
   <Costilled> and then there was deer
   <Costilled> don't get me started on deer
   <karass> i wont
   <karass> sorry i brought it up
   <Costilled> but the pizza was hand tossed
   <Costilled> the cook could have tossed off in the dough and we wouldn't know
   <Mystech> Well like didn't you watch him make the dough, too?
   <Costilled> He was kneading the dough as only a hooter girl could understand
   <Costilled> you know if they drop the dough while tossing it, your pizza is free
   <Mystech> Wow, man, that's deep.
   <Costilled> Did you know
   <Costilled> you can no longer get a pitcher of soda at pizza hut
   <Costilled> ?
   <karass> *gasp*
   <Costilled> your refills are free
   <karass> ive never gotten a pitcher of soda at pizza hut, so i dont think im terribly put off by the bad news
   <Costilled> they just don't want you hording the soda
   <Mystech> hehe
   <Costilled> the glasses are rediculously small however
   <Mystech> Arizona is the state of free refills.
   <Mystech> all refills are free.
   <Costilled> A smurf would get caught by his knickers if he decided to go for a swim
   <Mystech> uhhhhh. . . huh?
   <Costilled> and remember, it's never polite to place your tip to the server by aiming coins into his buttcrack
   <Mystech> O.o  It's not polite for your server's buttcrack to be showing.
   <Costilled> I didn't care
   <Costilled> I was tipping him with the money I got from the guy I kicked in the throat
   <Costilled> nevermind the fact that it was canadian
   <Costilled> the money that is, not the buttcrack
   <Mystech> Them canadians are infultrating out society.
   <karass> apparently the new 20 is going to be peach colored
   <Mystech> have you seen the new twenty dollar bills?
   <Mystech> They are colored!
   <mulefoot> They're peachy :)
   <Mystech> Just like canadian funny-money!
   <karass> i hear thats because they are made of human flesh
   <Costilled> yes
   <mulefoot> Soylent greenbacks?
   <Costilled> soylent cash
   <Mystech> By gadzer!
   <Costilled> eeeevil
   <Costilled> I must unshare my brainwave with you
   * Costilled takes his brain out of the DMZ
   <mulefoot> Its just a file on one one of your fillings.
   <Costilled> I have no fillings
   <Costilled> I'm crest's bitch
   <mulefoot> In that case we're going to have to change the shape of your brain cavity. I'm going to need a power drill and an M-80.
   <Costilled> scope flavored
   <Costilled> the currency of the UK is multicolor
   <Costilled> and also scratch and sniff
   <Costilled> scratch it and it smells british

i guess this is why this board is called random XD


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