Bill Waggoner

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Bill has vowed to take down Likeicare and ED

For information about the Bill Waggoner Crew, see Bill Waggoner Crew

Bill Waggoner at the height of his notoriety, getting made fun of on CSPAN2.

Bill Waggoner is a man of many trades; a freelance marketer and dedicated father by day, e-activist and final boss of the internet by night. Now, with ED being a fair entity, we have allowed Bill to sum up himself in that last sentence, but in the spirit of fairness, we feel it is our duty to inform our readers of this man's true nature.

Before the opioids, benzos, week long dopesleeps and sexual attraction to his daughter took up most of his free time, Bill played music in his spare time..

Bill is a sad lonely man. After his first wife divorced him and took the kids, the utter devastation of his pathetic life drew him into the internet, a land that he felt would welcome him, and possibly give him a new chance at life. Repeating history, Bill fucked himself over again, mostly due to his immense child pornography addiction. Long CP binges would leave him inside for days, draining the majority of his household's funding, which was brought in by a prostitute he took in on the grounds that she would pose as his significant-other. Discovering that her pity income could not feed his perverse and addictive personality, Bill was forced to find alternative means of bringing in some extra cash. Thus began the birth of Bill Waggoner, the "spam king".

Bill working hard for Alana's tampons


The teeth run in the family

Biography

Born in the Ohio suburbs back in ‘74, Bill lived a privileged life. He was an only child with two working parents. His father worked for the IRS while his mother moved around through emergency services and nursing. Growing up, Bill got picked on heavily. He was a short kid, coming in at around 5'4" so he was the obvious target for bullies, but his neuroticism would continually make it worse for himself.

Bill took solace in professional wrestling, and mimicked professional wrestler behavior in an attempt to "fit in". Bill took this as far as having his mom make him a shirt saying to kill another student styling himself after a wrestler. Bill found that the only effective way to make friends was to bribe them, as he would fill his bookbag with cans of coke and candy to bribe people into hanging out with him. Bill would never graduate highschool, but he would later purchase a diploma from the back page of a high times magazine before failing out a semester in to Community College.

As an adult, Bill's only honest job was as a pizza delivery boy. Besides this, he was involved in multi level marketing which would cause him to look at new ways to move product. He started his radio career by telling people they had cancer in their bathroom toiletries on public broadcast, but he would also figure out that he could pirate some software and mass mail to clientele. Thereafter Billy’s spamming activity would begin, his life forever changed.

Bill, after getting cucked by his longtime girlfriend, fell in love with her bastard son and vowed to father the young boy. He would later knock up the same broad and get a daughter out of the deal. Bill, wanting to ditch his whore, moved the family out to Las Vegas in order to pay her off for custody of both children (despite him having no biological relation to his son). He would allow these children to be in a household where he was slowly turning into a drug addict. While scamming nanny's, dating the only ugly showgirl in Vegas and snorting xanax, Bill would emotionally abuse his kids and turn them into two socially retarded technology addicts. Despite constantly proclaiming his love, bill has used his children as a shield to legal action, abusing his son’s identity to buy serverspace/internet connections and slept in the same bad as his daughter far past womanhood struck.

As his spamming ventures became less profitable, Bill got to the point where he needed to scam people on the internet to support his addiction, much less pay his rent. Scamming multiple people through bank wires to avoid mail fraud charges, he has successfully scammed his way through drug addiction for years. After losing custody of his kids, Bill has moved from shitty Vegas motel to shitty Vegas motel while swindling people to support his addiction. Today, Bill spends his time being dopesick, super-gluing his teeth back into his mouth and streaming on twitch.

Internet Activities a.k.a. What it's like being the final boss of the Internet

Saving the world, one spam email at a time


Internet Activist

In a style much like Daniel Brandt, Bill feels as it is his duty to rise up against major players of the internet, seemingly because they allow the sharing of information. Wagg's massive campaign to ultimately end freedom of speech began after his discovery of Google Maps, a horrid service that enables the CIA to spy on any given individual, not like they haven't been involved in such activity before the internet came along. With such services enabling doxing of those too incompetent to protect their own information, Bill entered a state of panic that his Tor cave could be exposed, and his endless collection of child pornography with it. Thus, he began fighting Facebook and Google, because they allowed the government, or anyone for that matter, to monitor him through the profiles he created.

To quote the reviewjournal's [[1]], "chances are good he has annoyed the hell out of you." Bill, starting off as a young pizza delivery boy grew into what his calls a "legit business man." This simply means that he's the guy who fills your email and skype inbox with Penis Enlargement Pill ads. To this day, Bill Waggoner spouts out about the differences between Email Marketing and "Spam", relegating to his enclosed echo-chamber of closeted homosexuality and self loathing addictions.

The Spam King

Now on Compact Disc

Bill is the self-proclaimed "Spam King." After bailing out of his failed music endeavor, Mr. Waggoner turned to spamming as his main source of income. His operations were enabled by his creation of countless pseudonyms and his vast network of commandeered computer systems. The majority of his spam messages contained advertisements for penis enlargement pills and weight loss programs. This operation, coupled with the exploits of numerous other spammers, warranted an anti-spam petition being brought before US Congress. After being exposed by Spamhaus, he went on to claim that the people who now prevent him from spamming are "un-American" and insisted that they are a part of a broader conspiracy known as the New World Order.

Bill Waggoner's Spam Rap Sheet: http://www.spamhaus.org/rokso/listing.lasso?file=606

Waggsnewteeth.jpg

His BlogTalkRadio Show

In late 2009 The Bill Waggoner Show was a well prayed upon show by 4channers. Bill, still at times, hosts his on BTR show but it often gets banned by BTR admins. Here, he talk about politics or the current economics of America.

Ghost owning Bill

Bill vs. Likeicare on Skype

Bill eventually became aware of his page on Encyclopedia Dramatica and became enraged not only at the things said about him but at the presence of photos of his children as well. Bill, apparently unaware of how ED works, took to Skype with ED administrator Likeicare under the assumption that Likeicare can be reasoned with and would baleet the page upon request. Rational talk broke down very quickly, and so Bill then immediately changed tactics and began making threats about how he would take down ED within 10 days. He further claimed that he knew ED's hosting provider, could take down Cloud Flare, knows the "Gods of the Internet," and finally would fly to Australia to kill Likeicare. The entire exchange was, of course, recorded and is presented below. Please watch it soon, as the Gods of the Internet will soon baleet it, along with all of ED, FOREVAR!!1

The Gods of the Internet Shall Smite You

See Also

External Links


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Bill Waggoner is part of a series on Internet Humanitarianism
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