Blumpkin

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A blumpkin is what got Howard Stern kicked off several Clear Channel radio stations and busted by the FCC. Transcripts (from the FCC's own web site) explain:

Radio Station:  WKRK-FM, Detroit, MI
Date/Time of Broadcast:  July 26, 2001, 6:30 a.m. to 7:30 a.m.
Material Broadcast:  The Howard Stern Show

HS:  Howard Stern
RQ:  Robin Quivers
MV:  Male Cast Member

HS:  I said to Mark Wahlberg yesterday, had he ever gotten a 
blumpkin from a girl and everyone around here is acting like they 
don't know what it is.  

RQ:  You're the only nutcase who does.  

MV:  I said ``blumpkin'' on the ``Norm Show'' and the network 
censor, we told him we just made the word up.  He goes, ``that's 
definitely not a real word right?''  We go, no,no,no. And I said 
it, I yelled out at a hooker in a cab.

HS:  What do you say to her, ``how about a blumpkin?''

MV:  I go ``honey, how much for a blumpkin?''

HS:  Right.

MV:  And uh the network censor never heard of it.  And he goes if 
you just made it up it's fine but if it's a real thing we can't 
have it.  So it's aired, it's been on ABC, it's like the dirtiest 
thing ever on television.

HS:  Yeah, but nobody knows what it is.  A blumpkin... I can 
explain it cleanly.

RQ:  There's nothing clean about a blumpkin.   

HS:  Well, a blumpkin is receiving oral sex while you're sitting 
on a toilet bowl if you are a man.  You're sitting on a toilet 
bowl and uh, while you're evacuating you receive your oral.  

RQ:  Ick.  

HS:  And uh, then, what did I say yesterday too you didn't 
understand?  Balloon knot?

RQ:  Yes, I don't know what that is.  Somebody said to me ``is 
that the funniest thing ever?'' and I was like ``what is that?''

HS:  A balloon knot...

RQ:  I didn't want to show my ignorance, I laughed too.  

HS:   A balloon knot...  I'm gonna post these on a web site...

RQ:  Yeah, we need a dictionary for this show.  

HS:  A balloon knot is when you bend over and I can see up right 
up your old...

RQ:  Up the wazoo? 

HS:  Up the wazoo and uh, you know that's a balloon knot that you 
see.  That's called a ``balloon knot.''

RQ:  Really, I did not know that.

HS:  Think about it, it looks like a balloon knot.

RQ:  I don't know.  Oh... you know what...

HS:  Tie up a balloon.

RQ:  I'm just thinking of a balloon knot...

MV:  It all makes sense, Robin, come on.

See also

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