Bravesgirl5

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BGIRL5 keeping real for her peeps

Bravesgirl5, now known as Bgirl5 or IRL as Lindsay, is an emotionally arrested charming young female who has foregone getting a job to go to college with the idea of living indefinitely with her parents. She rivals any 16 year old girl as a consummate cam whore with a devoted YouTube following consisting almost entirely of old men and nerds that hope she will someday take off her clothes on cam. Given that she has the intellectual capabilities of a golden retriever and a voice like nails on a chalk board, the hope of nudity and possible masturbation with produce is the only reason to continue watching her videos. Well, we take that back, she deleted them, lol.

Bravesgirl5 is an attention whore of the first rank, who always asks for it. Sadly, her predilection for enormous negro cock guarantees that her vagina will share much in common with a wind tunnel by the time she is able to legally drink. At that point, she will take up hanging around redneck honky tonks, swilling whatever is on tap, fucking good old boys in the backs of pickup trucks on Saturday night, and continuing to plaster her haggard, leather skinned mug all over YouTube, thinking someone cares. She also added to her level of fail recently by becoming the girlfriend of YouTube's posterboy for unfunny, Sxephil.

her with her pet niigra, who needs chiikens, and by the looks of it, is baked as hell.
It's easy to hate, It's harder to love.





Contents

GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUUUUUUUN

100% REAL FOOTAGE

December 27, 2006

SHE IS BACK, as YouTube Favicon.png BgirL5. zomg!

July 16, 2010

SHE IS BACK, as YouTube Favicon.png LinzLoves. Has reinvented herself as found a way to relieve onanists of their produce-covered monies as a chesty Van Nuys-based travel vlogger. Campaigning for Gary Johnson (L - NM), alongside longtime love interest Svengali buttsecks deviant Philip DeFranco a.k.a. YouTube Favicon.png sxephil.

The battle of Bravesgirl5

Bravesgirl5 was the makings of a tradition attention whore, except with a massive amount of subscribers urging to penetrate her. General wattagecat devised a plan to take her off the internet forever, saving her from what could have happened.

A Dumb Blonde

Lindsay err. Bravesgirl5 made the mistake of placing her name on the internets where everyone could see it. Her name, birthday, and pictures with her drinking with college boys were placed on ED.

The Reaction

Bravesgirl5 got onto ED IRC and requested an account, and blanked her own page [1] BETRAYING an ED sysop (mod sass at its highest).

Her MySpace

Someone placed a redirect embed of a Quicktime movie which brought her MySpace viewers to her ED page. Shocked, she deleted her MySpace account, allowing bantown to sweep in for the kill and take her MySpace name.

To this day, Bravesgirl5's myspace receives messages from pedophiles. Srsly.

Leaving YouTube

With nearly 3,000 subscribers she closed her account with all her videos deleted.

Victory

After outspoken /b/tard and well known lamer Talim phished the MySpace accounts of several of her friends and used one of the accounts to embed a quicktime movie into her comments that redirects visitors to her profile to this article, she deleted her MySpace account and removed all her videos on YouTube.

Since Bravesgirl5 has threatened to quit YouTube forever at least a hundred times, the YouTube community was shocked that she actually went through with it.

Ok. You caught me. I lied. Nobody cares that she deleted her crap videos except for the perverts that need to find new fap fodder.

Denial

After all her pwnage, the dumb bitch doesn't get the idea that she has been trolled and that she has lost. To this day she still continues to say "I'll be back someday!". Why? So more old men can stare at your chest? ED's recommendation to Bravesgirl5 is to act more civilized, show some restraint for god's sake and make videos of yourself playing "hide the cucumber".


   
 
I'm Lindsay, I'm a goof ball and I love the Atlanta Braves. I don't go live and most likely never will, so don't ask. Feel free to add me as a friend, I accept pretty much everyone. Don't ask me why I deleted my YouTube videos. Its not that I want to be bitchy about it, I'm just tired of explaining it over and over. The point is, I will be back...Once me and my family feel safe again. If you (yes you know who you are) are here to stalk/harass me or try to get shit on me, it's not going to work. You're only making your case worse. I'm the one getting shit on you every time you pull that shit...And let's just say that karma is a bitch. If you are here to just chill and talk...I love you.<3 No..Seriously..I do.
 

 
 

Bravesgirl5, Stickam

Hatred for Lonelygirl

   
 
LONELYGIRL15 IS OUT! NOT KIDDING Y'ALL
 

 
 

—Bravesgirl5

Her anti-lonelygirl15 sentiment and jb-status made her a hot commodity to the older men that inhabit the festering shit hole called YouTube.

Cam whore or just plain whore?

Some argue that they would hit it like the fist of an angry god

Bravesgirl5 angles to use the young Britney Spears tease tactic of projecting the image of both sexuality and innocence. Note how she's painted up like a cheap tramp in nearly every video, posed in her pictures to draw attention, and flaunts her sex appeal by wearing clothing which enunciate her budding breasts. In blatant contradiction, she stated on her YouTube and Stickam sites that she doesn't do live shows. She went so far in one YouTube video as to call those that had remarked upon her obviously sexual behavior "perverts" despite the fact that she is completely asking for it.

YouTube Favicon.png Bravesgirl5 protests her innocence (now with added lulz). Set to private.

Noodz

Bravesgirl5 cums clean.

The Bravesgirl5 Problem

WE'RE GONNA GET YUO WATTAGECAT
File:Bravesgirl paranoia.jpeg
Oh noes! ED is ha><0ring Bravesgirl5

Bravesgirl5 has been polarizing YouTube for months. Initially jealous of the subscriber list and popularity of Lonelygirl15, she attempted to attract the notice of the Lonelygirl15 fans. When it later became apparent even to those with an IQ below what is considered necessary to be functionally retarded that Lonelygirl15 was a hoax (namely, when a site appeared stating exactly that) she made an extremely anti-Lonelygirl15 video and attracted her first wave of haters.

Disclaimer

   
 
Copy of the disclaimer/warning:

First and foremost, the following video will not contain any form of nudity, dancing or sexual references. If that is all you're here for, I suggest you stop watching this video now. Also, if you are one of the people that claim you have something better to do with your time, stop watching now. The few precious minutes that you spend watching this video cannot and will not be refunded, so don't ask. As a human on youtube, you have the right to watch what you want, when you want. It is you, not me, who is responsible for "wasting" your time watching this video. Put simply, no one is making you watch this video; unless of course someone is holding a gun to your head saying "Watch this video or die." If that is the case, I am sorry. If you are one of the people who feel it is necessary to leave hateful comments,all you are really doing is making my comment count go up and therefore putting my video on the most discussed list. And that makes me happy. If you really hate me and want me to get off of youtube, stop leaving me comments and feeding my "ego". Otherwise I'm going to assume that you actually enjoy my videos and just aren't intelligent enough to say anything nice. I am sorry that your parents didn't love you enough to teach you anything about respect. Ok, that was a low blow, I'll admit it. Now that all of this has been said, if you leave any hateful comment, or one with a sexual reference, you are just proving that you are an illiterate retard.
 


 
 

Her Dox, well, Sort Of

Source: Xanga ~Info about you~

Full name? '''Lindsay REDACTED'''
Do you like your name? nope I hate it
Were you named after someone? no
What does your name mean? umm one time I read it meant PeAcEfUL IsLe..whatever thats supposta mean
Birthday? REDACTED
How old are you? 16
Location of birth? atl
Where do you live now?atl
Do you like it? not really
If you could live in another state where would you live?cali,def.
Hospital you were born at? REDACTED
Time you were born? 1:25pm
How much you weighed when you were born?8 lbs 2oz 
Eye color? hazel..mostly brownish green tho
Hair color? strawberry dirty blonde..mmhm
What school do you go to? centennial
Do you take after your mom or dad's family? definitly my dads 
Are you left or right handed? right

~B/f or G/f?/crush~

Do you have a g/f or b/f? yup!
If so, what's their name? Christopher Walken
How long have you been going out? almost 14 months
Were you friends before you went out? uhh for like 2 weeks
How old are they? 17
What do they look like?SEEXXXAAAAAAAY! hah brown hair, blue eyes, 6'3 
Do you have a crush on a celebrity? duh who doesnt
If so, who? john mayer, andy roddick

Well, you get the idea...

Quotes

Just so you guys know, we're all going to internet court:

   
 
<JordanM> Alright, well, I tried. This will be taken to court you can count on that.
 

 
 

And you will all be forging spam headers in no time. Here are some other choice bits:

   
 
<JordanM> if it is not removed the user will have criminal charges pressed against him and i really do not want to have to put myself or you @ ED through all of that
 

 
 

Much like Argent009, you can tell that in the end all Jordan cares about is the welfare of us EDiots.

   
 
<JordanM> its not just the pictures. it is my full name and false information posted about me that is putting my family in danger and it needs to stop.
 

 
 

OH NOES!!!!~!11!!oneone Call Jack Bauer!!!1

Don't Show Her Parents This

Bravegirl.jpg

She will lose her internet access, like, forever.

Her Fans

Trivia

Did you know Bravesgirl5:

  • Lives in her basement
  • Previously fostered a YouTube channel with over 2,800 subscribers
    • Many of her subscribers were old men
  • is now known under the alias "bgirl5"
  • Has a stickam, but never goes live
  • is currently studying communications, while dating some dude that watches her YouTube clips
  • Her voice sounds like the screech of chalk on a board
  • was born on April 10th

See Also

  • Sxephil
  • The Kewl Kids
  • Deleting your Youtube Videos
  • 16 year old girl
  • Attention Whore

External Links

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