From Encyclopedia Dramatica
|100 shekkels (or more if you have good shit) is currently being offered|
to anyone who can prove they know Brett IRL
Message The Drunken Peasants with proof for your money
| Breaking news!|
Fatso has now become a New-Age individjul. Expect this to change next week.
If you ever needed proof that YouTube is a haven of the bottom of the barrel of humanity due to its easy access and relative ease of gaining exposure it gives its users; and that Atheists can be just as immoral, nasty, lying, scamming and stupid as any televangelist scam artist, look no further than Brett Keane.
Who is Brett Keane?
Brett Keane is a 40 year old thief, liar, and deadbeat wife-beating piglike welfare cheat with a pear-head and a sharpied-on mustachio. He lives in a trailer in
Festus, Missouri New York, together with JDub where he spends all day playing Elder Scrolls
Ornline and making YouTube videos every five minutes, while his heavily bruised and injured wife works welfares to support the family.
Some may point to people like FakeSagan, Coughlan666, TheAmazingAtheist and Inmendham as examples of atheists who are self-centered, lying twats...but they got nothing on the Keane. Unsurprisingly, Brett does not have any serious socio-political or ideological loyalties, as demonstrated by how he went back and forth from being an atheist to a Christian and back again (and even dabbled in Islam) all in the pursuit of eWelfare. If there's one thing he is loyal too, it's money from gullible idiots on the internet.
A Little Internet History
Somewhere around 2000, Brett Keane first infected the internet (like a fungal rash), with several half-baked websites and message board accounts, where he tried peddling his illiterate Christian Goth "novels" and incompetent attempts at "music".
Unexpectedly, he got banned from every single site his ugly mug appeared on.
He therefore tried to hide his fat head, and use pseudonyms such as Damion Andrews.
Brett Keane started off his YouTube career with surprisingly mundane videos about science and atheism without even showing his face and in the most inoffensive way possible. As his videos started getting
more attention, this single feeble iota of power went to his bloated head, and he began appearing on camera (to the displeasure of everyone), proclaiming himself "the sexiest YouTube atheist" and making 400,000 videos a day.
He began posting
insulting insultive videos mocking random YouTubers for not being atheists. Then he made videos on every topic in existence. Politics, video games, fitness, there wasn't a topic this genius wouldn't pontificate about, not because he gave a shit or knew anything about this stuff, he just did it because he wanted to get his videos to be the top rated in every subject.
Brett began to build a (very, very small) cult following.
Soon, the other 99.9999999% of YouTube (that existed outside of the microscopic Brett Keane Tonguebath Cult) began to criticize him for his shallow, dull and inane videos. Manbearpig lost his shit like a Gorilla on a strict diet of All-bran and Ex-Lax.
He began blocking and insulting everyone, foolishly believing his ass was bulletproof. It got so deranged, even his former fans crusaded against him. This led to the paranoid fatass releasing personal info on other (sometimes random) YouTube channels that he blamed for all his troubles. In Brett's fevered imagination, it's always a cabal of two or three people that are behind his failures to thrive.
This led to a righteous Banhammer smiting, and his migrating in disgrace to other websites, such as LiveVideo before his antics led to bans there as well. Eventually, he tried several times to come back to YouTube, only to be told to GTFO. He has obtained a cheated youtube partnership from FattyCabbie, so he can supplement his welfare checks with JewTube dollars, because that is totally allowed.
How he became the most hated man on the internet
Lightfingered Brett never met an anything he wouldn't gladly steal. Considering how he has everything just handed to him by the Gubmint and his dull-witted fanbase...he doesn't see why everything else shouldn't be free for the taking as well. He's been caught claiming ownership of an essay that he merely copypasted. He's been caught claiming ownership of poems that he merely copypasted. He's been caught claiming ownership of Here's a non-YouTube mirror song lyrics that he merely copypasted. To him, anything that can be acquired through Ctrl+C and Ctrl+V is same as a valid purchase.
His most famous copypasta moment was when he stole the work of female Judy Burnette, really a good choice with his newly found feminism.
- Brett copy-pasted the entirety of this in a song he called Life Is A Prison
- Brett copy-pasted the entirety of this in a song he called When Is It Time
- Brett copy-pasted the entirety of Stupid Game Of Me in a song he called Marching into Hell, that featured the iconic Hell March theme from Red Alert.
- Brett copy-pasted the entirety of the lyrics written by a 15 year old girl (Still better at English than Brett will ever be)
- Brett spliced together another YouTubers videos and passed them off as his own
- Brett used to host a website where he ripped off news and passed them off as his own, without ever giving a source
- Brett couldn't make his own shitty YouTube background so he stole one.
- Brett copy-pasted the entiry of a rotten.com article into a video and passed it off as his own. To top it off he even put it on top of Slayer's South of Heaven, that was played in full.
- Brett copy-pasted an article from Yahoo Finance
- There are countless other examples of Brett stealing full lyrics, riffs, news, backgrounds, videos, whatever you can imagine.
Showing his wife love...with his fists
It was bad enough suspecting that he beats his wife; but MOM also felt the loving care of his amateur ass-kicking. Here's Brett trying to tell two different, mutually contradictory versions of why his wife filed a restraining order against Mr. Toad and his Pummeling Fists of Marital Bliss.
When backed into a corner, Brett will -- completely out of nowhere -- accuse his detractors of "attacking his wife"; which is cracked, because the only person people bitch about is Brett himself. He has made this accusation hundreds of times, but only one time has anyone ever said an unkind word about Dawn.
And here's it is, right from their sister-in-law....
The original E-beggar
His house was supposedly going on auction. Begged for money.
The Xbox360 slim is released. Fatty decides he needs one. Probably why he made up the story about getting shit-canned in the first place.
Apparently forgets to pay rent from this month.
Highlights his Amazon wish list in a video. Mentions how his kid already has an Xbox 360 Slim, and would like a Wii. The list totals $2,300
Makes a video crying about how he is going to get evicted, for not paying rent since October. Magically the money needs $2,300. lines up perfectly with how much his Amazon wish list came to.
Adds yet another item to his wish-list
Now his new contract is up, and he could be evicted at any time. And he needs your money, so his family doesn't starve to death. How are they supposed to eat without a brand new Wii?
I'm rich and you bitch
Agoraphobia is fear of open spaces. So when Brett claims to suffer from this one shouldn't be expecting to see him
Being worse at gaming than DarkSydePhil
—Brett Keane, I'm Building an Empire and I Won't Be Defeated.
World Of Warcraft
Wanted a mount, so he e-begged
The X-53 Touring Rocket is a scam mount created by Blizzard, in order to get stupid WoW players into recruiting their friends, or using their details, in order to get a mount. And of course Brett wanted in on that action. More important than getting a job. Having already used all of his options in terms of friends, meaning he already used their details, he was unable to get this DLC. So off to YouTube and e-beg and cry. And somewhere some pathetic lonely basement dweller actually decided to pay money for this game, just so Brett could fly around before getting ganked repeatedly.
Please help me not get a job
Look at me not getting a job
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Created fake book reviews
Brett is an arthur. Not an author, that would require him to be able to spell it. His books read like they were written by a dyslexic 6th grader who had one hour to turn in a 20 page assignment. None of his books got sold, as they are the worst thing ever put to paper. So he had to find out a new way to pawn off his Christian goth edgelord novels onto unsuspecting customers. The idea was to misuse Amazon.com's review system, by making up fake websites, or just downright posing as those, and writing positive reviews.
Actual reviews of his book
False flagging, DMCAing and blocking everyone who disagrees with him
Plagiarism, fake book reviews, wife beating, horrible gaming, e-begging what else could Brett possibly do that make himself more unlikable? Well, flag down anyone who dares to criticize him, of course. And if that doesn't work, send a DMCA, hope they counter-claim and use it to dox them. So was the case when straightd0pe made a video exposing him, and Brett was quick to retaliate by firing off the DMCA's.
And there are literally dozens of examples of Brett Keane DMCAing people.
And that's before we get to him and his butt-buddy JDubs flagging everyone. When the DMCA was successful all Burger Keane had to do was wait in order for the people affected to counter-notice, using their legal name, so he could proudly present it to the world. As was the case with straightd0pe, when he tried to claim that his real name was Edward. He later changed that story into that he found this name by doing a Google search. He later changed that story into that Gimmabreakman mentioned it in a video. A complete hackjob of a video. And he has obviously used this on myriads of other people as well.
Debating the Brett Keane Way
If you were to ask Brett (of even if you DON'T ASK) he'll gladly tell you about his perfect record of never being defeated in a debate. This perfect record, of course, skips all of those times he has been defeated in debate. Which happens every time he debates someone.
Want to "Pawn" all the trolls telling hurtful truths about you and your eBegggin', ego-strokin' self?
This is how to "Pawn" Trolls.
A simple plan for a simple man.
A simple plan for a simple caveman, printed sloppily in crayon on drool-proof paper.
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Brett Keane is being protected by Youtube
Brett Keane is unbannable if you or anyone else reports his channel nothing will happen.
Even knowing he often violates youtube's terms of service by bullying others or bashing their religious beliefs he is still unbannable.
If you have the time feel free to file a report against his youtube channel and see for you're self he is being protected by youtube he will never be banned.
Proof Brett Keane is not allowed on youtube
Fresh Brett of Bel Air
- HappyCabbie - His best friend who has died
- JDubs - fat and retarded like Brett
- Hacking Team - David Vincenzetti is a proto-Brett
Brett's Own Accounts and sockpuppets
an_hero yet again for his attention seeking and being brett's pet.Another channel along with Jdubs who hasn't tried to
Back as the super wife beating doc dropping fraud that is. Christian.
Was banned within 24 hours. LULZ. With a name that he has delusional celebrity status. Even if it's for beating his wife, false flagging, pissing off his haters and trolls. Obviously
targeted for termination in the next days or months on. Banned for spambait
Another one. He's also back, how long will his fat fingers last if he starts false_flagging? But he's not even relevant anymore since 2007. Even so he's just advertisting his brother's band Flagged for trying to pwn MrRepzion. Shit He has his wife on there at gunpoint trying to whore out his cheated partnered channel.
- His brother's band, nothing of importance. Maybe a song about ebegging or beating your wife would be suitable.
Socketpuppet alert! Closed. Obviously. Duuuh. HOLY FUCKING SITUATION THE FAT FUCK GOT PWNED BY MIZZSTAR, THOUGH WE'LL EXCEPT HIS FAT ASS RETURN SOONER OR LATER 2013 SMACKDOWN SITUATION SPECIAL: BACK FOR MORE Unwarranted_self_importance DRAMA THIEF ALERT !!! Make sure to double check for any PLAGIARISM!!!It might be and so he can talk about shit_no_one_cares_about all over again. Also back on his channel. Hoping he'll start shit with the haters and trolls again. Apparently a fan boy or his socket account made so when he gets butthurt over haters and trolls. He goes over there to cry about it. Socket account to harass and troll William Ga's Google hangout, because Brett wants to be the little girl. (Meaning he's too hot for older women and wants his pedophile) He's now friends with HappyCabbie, BFF, after removing two of his strikes that were meant to be on his channel for being a huge retarded blob, and they can go both get cancer, meanwhile while MimicVendetta, portraying anonymous has caused a shitstorm, to make brett look like a fool by having other dude pretend to be his white_knight. Brett's response is just him being butthurt while golf clapping. Meaning ready to smack his wife afterwards. This account was too much cancer for youtube. Terminated. Brett's Newest Channel (first two videos is his introduction and some failed trolling attempt against a user named Benos and ShredderNeverDies, which also predicts he's going to make videos on another users that said bad and truthful things about him, because his cyber bullying site wasn't enough.] Well gaydubs obviously is the first one to comment on his vids, because he wants to fuck brett rape. Closed until he shits out a another new main account CLOSED! Click the Link. It clearly states he closed the account himself. Here's the (dead) account he shared with his pet JDupe. His channel devoted to the World of Warcraft he insists he never plays anymore. CLOSED!
http://brettkeanevideo.com/ NOPE FALSE ALARM, IT'S BACK UP The site was dead, looks like it's time for the ebegging season to begin. Because he's so shit at keeping a website together, because he has no real job to begin with. He's too busy white knighting Onision as to getting into other people's dramas. Note: Don't go to his website, all it'll do is give him money.Arvixe the webhoster pwned him for cyberstalking and like every brettkeanevideo webhoster pwned him for the millionth time.
- http://keanevlogs.blogspot.com Apparently, the blog was hacked to make brett look less badass.
- Golgothica One of his many failed websites.
- His "Exposing Cyber-Bullies" Page (note the self-fellating URL.)
his Epic Butthurt Blog CLOSED!No, RE-Opened! But because he closed the YouTube channel connected to it...there is no old content on it. Brett's StickamClosed. http://twitter.com/#!/MrBrettKeane I think this is a parody twitter, hence he loves beating his wife. And brett wouldn't say that on camera.Deleted
- http://brettkeane.weebly.com/ Nothing much, but you can contact him, by giving him nice messages
http://www.youtube.com/user/WorldofWarcraftScrub Where brett (A good for nothing)sucks at World of Warcraft.CLOSED!
- Brett's Pin Dick Another shitty link to his videos.
Brett Keane is part of a series on YouTube.