ED5

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Happy Birthday!


Ed5 brawl.jpg












That's right, kids! On Thursday, December 10th, your favorite wiki turned FIVE!

Let's take a moment to look back in anger at all ED's had to offer the world.
Then we'll sing a birthday song, enjoy some delicious caek, and watch as ED opens its presents.
EdsFifth.jpg
I'm THIS many.


Birth

Encyclopedia Dramatica was conceived December 8-10th 2004 while girlvinyl was impatiently awaiting the delivery of her new ibook. ghettofinger and girlvinyl were outraged and amused at the ill-treatment of internet celebrity jameth by the moderators and nerds at wikipedia.

Girlvinyl decided it was time to present an alternative to the fascist hold they had over information on the internets. The moniker was coined by 33mhz on jameth's journal. Creation of the project was swift and is under constant development. December 10th marked the inaugural install and first operational night of Encyclopedia Dramatica. The world hasn't been the same since. Millions have now learned just how serious business the internet is.

Timeline

Timeline of Events
2004 2005 2006 2007 2008 2009
[-+] [-+] [-+] [-+] [-+] [-+]
Decades:

1970s1980s1990s2000s2010s2020sFuture

Years:

20002001200220032004200520062007200820092010201120122013201420152016201720182019

2004 was another miserable, shitty year filled with plenty of drama and AIDS. Americunts re-elected a literal chimp, W and a few MMOs launched that destroyed millions of lives.

Need a recap of what happened last year? We've got you covered.

Events

Gallery

See Also

Dramatic Years
Preceded by
2003
2004 Succeeded by
2005
Decades:

1970s1980s1990s2000s2010s2020sFuture

Years:

20002001200220032004200520062007200820092010201120122013201420152016201720182019

Katrina.jpg
As mid-July 2005

Old, outdated crap. 2005 is long obsolete, but is the year in which the internet started to shift into Web 2.0. According to NBC, Gwen Stefani's Holla Back Girl is the number one song of 2005, making 2005 the Year of Shit Music, again. W continues second reign over Murrika after votes were baleeted, thus proving niggerdom was soon to come.

Need a recap of what happened last year? We've got you covered.

Events

Numerous shitty memes from this year include Chuck Norris, The Million Dollar Homepage, Back Dorm Boys, George Bush doesn't care about black people, Loose Change, Tom Cruise going apeshit on Opera, that retarded Batman meme, etc.. And the list goes on...

Joseph Evers

   
 
Freedom of information for all eternity.
 

 
 

—Joseph Evers, Gentleman & scholar.

Stumbling out of the desert after a month-long ayahuasca binge, and having discovered the ancient secret of health, wealth, and self, he set his sights to ED—and brings the much-needed loyalty to lulz that has sustained ED through these six long years. Oh, and deep pockets.

See Also

Decades:

1970s1980s1990s2000s2010s2020sFuture

Years:

20002001200220032004200520062007200820092010201120122013201420152016201720182019

lol

YouTube Favicon.png "Nutrition for elderly"

2006 was a good year for drama. Democrats won the House and the Senate, only to see their one seat majority die of a heart attack before the power kicked in yo. Loose Change creators released another batshit video, and all while the machine of IRL worked, drama was occurring all throughout the internets, which we now know are a series of tubes. It was the designated the International Asperger's Year (seriously) commemorating the 100th anniversary of the birth of Dr. Hans Asperger, discoverer of Asperger's Syndrome.

The most important thing to remember before reading this article is that Fred Bauder cannot practice law in Colorado due to soliciting a client's wife for prostitution.

Need a recap of what happened last year? We've got you covered.


Sheneequa's throwback to 2006.

Events

January

February

March

April

Rest in peace.

May

  • LJ mommies go batshit-insane when LJ Abuse tell them they cannot have breastfeeding default icons.
  • A teacher calls a student "nigga" and sparks a massive political debacle
    • Get away from the door, niggaa

June

Oh yeah, that's how I like it
  • The founder of Purple PJs decides to go batshit crazy.
  • Put shoe on head becomes known.
  • ED's trademark rainbow blinkies are used to make fun of Jacknstock for being fired.

July

Created by Sheneequa with MS Paint.
  • ED IRC is created.
  • A bunch of asspie 13-year-olds go insane when they see that ED joked about the Beatles!
  • MONGO, a Wikipedia admin, goes ballistic when a screencap of ED's main page is uploaded to TOW, and repeatedly vandalizes ED.
  • ED hosts the P-p-p-powerbook tale.
Tawnee hates Erectile Dysfunction.

August

  • /b/-day 2006 occurs.
  • Culturalbaggage sees his three line "article" and legally threatens ED. Tfo then expands his article to what it is now and culturalbaggage quits before he gets any further behind.
  • Funnelgirl becomes known.
  • Littlefag becomes the self-proclaimed King of Trolls and fails horribly.
  • Vincent Margera gets arrested after feeling up some 12 year old girl boobs.
THIS PICTURE IS A PARODY OKAY?

September

  • DannyRose rapes a paraplegic fox-child.
  • Duke Otterland, an autistic furry who gets pissed off about his ED article, documenting the Duke's daring exploits. Lulz ensue.
  • Facebook implements a new stalking feature that had college students up in arms. Nowadays, everybody uses it.
Proof that he is guilty
Kim in the Flesh

October

So I heard you have a cast fetish

November

December

Gallery

See Also

Anotheraetan.jpg
ED5
is part of a series on


The History of Encyclopedia Dramatica

[Seal ThemOpen the Records]

Events:
In Chronological Order

In the BeginningAttempted coup of the wikiRFJason CL ExperimentMay 2007Dancing sandwich warED turns 5Creation of the ED MascotED sued by Australian Human Rights CommissionsAustralian Media interviewSheneequa Turns FourGirlvinyl deletes "Niggers"DeHippo replaces ED with KYM cloneOperation RestorationNew ED founder v& ◆ We change domains over 9000 times for various, hilarious reasons ◆ EDF2 game on the newsED turns 10

During the Great Reign of ED:
Includes Timelines

2005200620072008200920102011201220132014201520162017

Other Notable Years:

1980s1990s2000s2010sY2KFuture2001200220032004

See Also:

ED GovernmentEncyclopedia Dramatica in the NewsDisgraced, Missing and Dead DramaticansTaking down ED

Dramatic Years
Preceded by
2005
ED5 Succeeded by
2007
Decades:

1970s1980s1990s2000s2010s2020sFuture

Years:

20002001200220032004200520062007200820092010201120122013201420152016201720182019

1 image summary

2007, Microsoft's patch for the faulty 2006, has been proven to be just as buggy as the last year. Notable for being the climax of meme-faggotry, producing several lulzy memes this year.

2007 is also the year when the iPhone and The Big Bang Theory came out and therefore women discover video games and the internets for the first time, beginning third-wave feminism's start of ruining what was nice.

Some end users were tazed. Some gained sexual attractions Ebon Lupus, children, and even cartoon mice. Others were arrested for being pedophiles, and for not taking a seat right over there. Some flew off the handle and killed themselves. Many even died from bullet related injuries. Yes, this glitchy release has caused vans to explode off of their frames, monolithic meeting places to disappear, and all the beautiful women either died or were given worse fates. Leading scientists have traced these errors to an optional feature known to cause unpleasant side effects.

2007 has proved itself to be as terrible as the old 06 model. Luckily, we are quite certain that life will be improved drastically as soon as 2008 comes out, hopefully in time for Christmas.

Need a recap of what happened last year? We've got you covered.


EDiots look back to 2007.

Events

January

February

It was Renzo, lol.

March

Ray Jones, one of the lulziest articles you'll see

April

Chocolate Rain society comes crashing through your veins

May

ED died this month, so pretty much the only thing worthwhile was watching pigslop get ruined.

June

Tyler Dumstorf bags a couple

July

They're hackers on steroids, almost like an internet hate machine...

August

Oh come on everyone on the internets lol'd at this one.

September

KCFireplug on Colbert Report

October

[email protected] says: andsleep together every night
serious says: if we sleep that is ;)
[email protected] says: true
[email protected] says: cause we would have sex every night

November

Megan Meier's parents daydreaming about bulls and rabbits.

December

Dr4g0nK1d has suffered 456 viruses because of you fucking morons, over the past 5 years.

See Also

Anotheraetan.jpg
ED5
is part of a series on


The History of Encyclopedia Dramatica

[Seal ThemOpen the Records]

Events:
In Chronological Order

In the BeginningAttempted coup of the wikiRFJason CL ExperimentMay 2007Dancing sandwich warED turns 5Creation of the ED MascotED sued by Australian Human Rights CommissionsAustralian Media interviewSheneequa Turns FourGirlvinyl deletes "Niggers"DeHippo replaces ED with KYM cloneOperation RestorationNew ED founder v& ◆ We change domains over 9000 times for various, hilarious reasons ◆ EDF2 game on the newsED turns 10

During the Great Reign of ED:
Includes Timelines

2005200620072008200920102011201220132014201520162017

Other Notable Years:

1980s1990s2000s2010sY2KFuture2001200220032004

See Also:

ED GovernmentEncyclopedia Dramatica in the NewsDisgraced, Missing and Dead DramaticansTaking down ED

Dramatic Years
Preceded by
2006
2007 Succeeded by
2008
Decades:

1970s1980s1990s2000s2010s2020sFuture

Years:

20002001200220032004200520062007200820092010201120122013201420152016201720182019


Most everyone would rather forget 2008 altogether and ED is no exception. Between all the unfunny and shit hitting the fan IRL, however, were plenty of lulz, drama and Internets to keep the snugglenet grinning like a batshit crazy Joker. There are 8,000,000 stories in the virtual city; these are just some of them.

Need a recap of what happened last year? We've got you covered.


EDiots look back on 2008.

Expected Events

These are a list of events people expected to happen, but miraculously, didn't.

Events

January

February

March

April

Lioncash08.jpg

May

June

July

August

Lolympicsmatos1.jpg
Site's closed soulja boy.jpg

September

October

  • Bailout Plan becomes known.
  • OJ Simpson finally goes down in flames on the tenth anniversary of his acquittal.
  • MTV gets rick-rolled by Anonymous.
  • Forumwarz Episode 2 is born.
  • Losttrap attempts to persuade Anonymous into sending him unmarked estrogen.

November

December

Gallery

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

See Also

Anotheraetan.jpg
ED5
is part of a series on


The History of Encyclopedia Dramatica

[Seal ThemOpen the Records]

Events:
In Chronological Order

In the BeginningAttempted coup of the wikiRFJason CL ExperimentMay 2007Dancing sandwich warED turns 5Creation of the ED MascotED sued by Australian Human Rights CommissionsAustralian Media interviewSheneequa Turns FourGirlvinyl deletes "Niggers"DeHippo replaces ED with KYM cloneOperation RestorationNew ED founder v& ◆ We change domains over 9000 times for various, hilarious reasons ◆ EDF2 game on the newsED turns 10

During the Great Reign of ED:
Includes Timelines

2005200620072008200920102011201220132014201520162017

Other Notable Years:

1980s1990s2000s2010sY2KFuture2001200220032004

See Also:

ED GovernmentEncyclopedia Dramatica in the NewsDisgraced, Missing and Dead DramaticansTaking down ED

Dramatic Years
Preceded by
2007
2008 Succeeded by
2009
Decades:

1970s1980s1990s2000s2010s2020sFuture

Years:

20002001200220032004200520062007200820092010201120122013201420152016201720182019

2009 in a nutshell.

2009 has been yet another banner year that has blessed us with some of the more notable internet happenings that you have come to expect from this wonderful medium that we choose to exploit and use. The usual gang of internet nerds, retards, and angry mobsters have outdone themselves once again and have made 2009 an unexpectedly grand year in lulz. Folks like crusader cat have offered us a chance to brighten our days with laughter, while memes such as Zalgo have given us a pause where we might reflect upon the fact that this internet thing is quite silly, and finally, the Dan Lirette story taught us that babies only die when you kick them in the head.

But that's not all—2009 showed us the softer side of the internet as well. Heartwarming tales such as Kenny Glenn, Cheyenne Cherry, Camille Marino, DracoGuard, and Esachasa displayed mankind's ever-open heart, sympathy, and his ability to show compassion for his fellow animals.

And that's not all! Encyclopedia Dramatica also showcased several misfortunes that senselessly deprived us of our beloved entertainers. Massive buttgrief and sorrow was expended upon the deaths of Farrah Fawcett, Michael Jackson, Billy Mays, Patrick Swayze, and Ted Kennedy.

There have been some good irl trolls as well, the biggest being Tony48219, but let's not forget the most spectacular troll of all: the fact that Encyclopedia Dramatica turned 5 this year despite all of its detractors, skeptics, haters, and doubters. During the festivities P-p-p-powerbook! won the contest for best article ever, upsetting Chris-chan. And on top of all of this internet hoopla, ED got its own forum, which would make it a tradition to destroy itself once a week.

Once again, the most important thing to know before reading this article is that Fred Bauder cannot practice law in the state of Colorado due to soliciting a client's wife for prostitution.


EDiots look back on 2009.

Need a recap of what happened last year? We've got you covered.

Events

January

The face that launched 1,000,000 shit brix.

February

Nevar Fucking Forget

March

Sup dawg we heard you like to whine like a bitch.

April

Tony48219 becomes the first YouTube an hero
  • Angry Homo Kid becomes known.
  • Columbine's 10th anniversary.
  • Dick Neck becomes known.
  • Pig Flu becomes known. Like AIDS, the Pig Flu was probably invented by the Jewish Secret Service to scare you.
  • The Hipster Grifter becomes known.
  • The R Word is a thing these days. Both online and IRL.
  • This is the second notice that the factory warranty on your vehicle is expiring becomes known; /b/ decides to wage war against those annoying telemarketers.
  • Tony48219 (YouTube Favicon.png Tony48219) kills fellow YouTuber YouTube Favicon.png AsiaMcGowan after an e-argument.
  • Tubcat dies.
  • Zalgo i̦̼̻ͣͥ̕s̤͚̺̻̻̮̭̆ ͤ̂҉͚̭̪̘̣͍̙c̴͙̃̐ͣͨ̈́ô͍͈̜̣̺̎̃͌́ͅͅm͈̭͔̦̮̩͇̓̒̅̒̽͞iͦ̀n̲͈̝̹̺͕ͮğͯ͂ͫ ̫̭ͩ͠t̲̻̳̗͑o͆͑͌̿̔ ͟r͍̦͎̳͇͈̱̆̔ͦ̊ͭ͗̌u̼͒ͫ́̾̐ͨ͠i̥̩͙̖ͣͫ̂̄͛͌͘ṉ̬̀̌ͤͥ̓̍̑͜ ̥̥̠̦͇̹ͨ͛ͨ͗y͕̝̫͓̭͈͒ͨ̅͛̔ͅo̱̝̟̼̺̻ͨͨ͗̌͝u̙̜ͬͪr͙̗̪̟͔̞̭͒ ͇͕̬̝̃̓͒̏̽͘ͅͅt̨̹̟͍̫e̫̲̯̒ẍ̪͖̑́̓̏t̺̹ͪͯ̉ͮ̎s͌ͬ̓̃ ̟ͯͨ̃̀ͬ̚̚̕a̟̞͚̮̻ͮ̿́̋̅̂̚͢n͉̈́d͎͉́̇ͯ̊ͣ͗ ̡̝̘̯͙͚͍̔͊̈̍ͨb̹̱͈̦͓̲͒ͩͤ̆ͭͯ̆l̔a̅ͣ͝cͣ̄ͭk̠̞ę̝̖̫̦̗͛́͂̉ṋ̥̓̀ ̗̱͎͕̉̅̂̀ͩ͒ͫu͙͖̱͚ͥ̉̓̓́́p̠̖̜̺̳͓̄ ̗͈̩̪̲͂̽͌͐͒͜y͚ͫͨ͗ͤo͚̜uͨ҉̻͉̫͉̬͚̯r̭̩̫͉̘ͪ̈́̃̀̋̈́́̚ ͮͤ͌̿ͬ̊̕p͈̥̰̖͒̍̊̉i̷̐̍͊̈̀̾́c̢͉̣͈͎̤s̳̤̱̲̜͍̍ͮͥ̚͡.̴͎̻͎̮͔́
  • ED is mentioned in a leaked government document "2009 Virginia Terrorism Threat Assessment" (on Slashdot).

May

Oh god put that away

June

No, no it's not
Now he can reenact Thriller!

July

It's just a fun thing, really.

August

September

He loves bowlcuts so much even his fursuit has a bowlcut.

October

HAHAHA

November

oic

December

Gallery

See Also

Anotheraetan.jpg
ED5
is part of a series on


The History of Encyclopedia Dramatica

[Seal ThemOpen the Records]

Events:
In Chronological Order

In the BeginningAttempted coup of the wikiRFJason CL ExperimentMay 2007Dancing sandwich warED turns 5Creation of the ED MascotED sued by Australian Human Rights CommissionsAustralian Media interviewSheneequa Turns FourGirlvinyl deletes "Niggers"DeHippo replaces ED with KYM cloneOperation RestorationNew ED founder v& ◆ We change domains over 9000 times for various, hilarious reasons ◆ EDF2 game on the newsED turns 10

During the Great Reign of ED:
Includes Timelines

2005200620072008200920102011201220132014201520162017

Other Notable Years:

1980s1990s2000s2010sY2KFuture2001200220032004

See Also:

ED GovernmentEncyclopedia Dramatica in the NewsDisgraced, Missing and Dead DramaticansTaking down ED

Dramatic Years
Preceded by
2008
2009 Succeeded by
2010
Featured article December 31, 2009
Preceded by
Chanology Contest
ED5 Succeeded by
Food Not Bombs
Baecktothefuture.jpg

Time Machine

Holy shit! Somebody archived the archives!

ED's in your tubes, killing your news

Hey, how's your news?

In it's five short years of lulzitude and trollery, ED has managed to attention whore itself into the clutches of old media moar than once. Good thing their arthritis keeps them slow. See our stalkers here.

Birthday Cards


Delicious caek

Happy Birthday To You!!!

Is that semen covering the cake? Looks like semen to me.
Aetan-cake.png

[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]

Astrological Chart

[Enough of this bullshitWhat do the stars hold?]
Oh, heavens
  • Name: ED
  • December 10 2004
  • 12:00 PM Time Zone is PST
  • San Francisco, CA

Rising Sign is in 09 Degrees Pisces Very sensitive to your surroundings, other people's feelings become your feelings. Try to avoid negative people because your tendency to empathize with them will make you negative also. A dreamer, you like to escape to a world of your own creation. As such, you are known for the vividness of your imagination and should try to share your inner visions with others. Very self-sacrificial by nature, beware of others becoming overly dependent on you or vice versa.

Sun is in 19 Degrees Sagittarius. Very fun-loving, spirited and energetic, you have a huge reservoir of physical energy within you that needs to be released. As such, sitting at a keyboard shooping cocks for hours is very important to you. Quite gregarious, you enjoy being with other people, but you tend to avoid emotionally restrictive or intimate relationships. Constantly curious about the broader issues of life, you may at times be quite careless and sloppy about details -- you tend to leap to conclusions before all the facts are in. An avid reader, you are totally enthusiastic about any given subject should it interest you. You are known for being homophobic, racist, anti-semitic and in general, very positive!

Moon is in 01 Degrees Sagittarius. An idealist, you prefer the grand, the beautiful, the good and the noble. You get very disappointed when your high expectations in life are not met. Very curious by nature, you enjoy traveling and learning about other peoples and cultures. Try to avoid your tendency to ignore the small but important details of living. You are independent and free, and you want others to be that way, too. Optimistic, buoyant and cheerful, others like to have you around. You have an incessant desire to learn as much as possible about metaphysics, religion, philosophy and any other broad, deep subject - so you can properly ridicule it. Your life tends to be punctuated by bursts of energy and frenetic activity.

Mercury is in 17 Degrees Sagittarius. Your mind is very curious and inquisitive, always seeking information on a wide variety of topics. The broader the subject matter (philosophy, science, religion, metaphysics), the more it will appeal to you. You prefer to deal with abstractions -- the small but important details associated with any subject tend to slip your grasp. You are known for being blunt, honest and truthful.

Venus is in 22 Degrees Scorpio. Your feelings about others are deep, powerful, intense and complex. When you like someone, you do so totally and obsessively - if you do not like someone, they do not exist. Your faithfulness and loyalty to your lover is unquestioned, indeed at times it is too much so -- you get so possessive that you almost smother your partner. At times, your feelings are kept deep within you and, because they are so complex and intense, they frighten you -- this is the way that you try to ignore them. But the more you try to do this, the more explosive things get when you eventually do express them.

Mars is in 19 Degrees Scorpio. Your likes and dislikes are strong and intense, never casual or superficial. You are known for your persistence and willful obsession. Once you have decided on a course of action, you are unstoppable. Your emotional actions tend to be extreme, although you try to keep them muted. And you tend to release your anger as sarcasm or irony. Beware of your tendency to hold grudges and to be vengeful. When you do fight, or release your internal tensions, you do so body and soul -- you become totally passionate and your outbursts are awesome to behold.

Jupiter is in 14 Degrees Libra. You are generally good at balancing opinions and judging issues, but you tend to be indecisive when it comes to making up your own mind. You are objective and quite concerned with fair play and justice. But, when it comes to yourself, you are so aware that whatever you do might upset the apple cart that you often choose to compromise rather than do anything that might make you lonely or vulnerable. Relationships are very important to you -- you learn about yourself and grow through observing yourself interacting with others. Your æsthetic tastes are refined, but expansive and expensive.

Uranus is in 03 Degrees Pisces. You, and most of your peers, are extremely idealistic and want to change society by completely reorienting its highest religious goals and aspirations. Just be careful to make sure that your new goal structures are properly grounded in reality so that they have a chance of being accepted by the majority.

You're Invited

Also we totally accept presents.
You wouldn't show up to a 5 year old's birthday without presents, would you?

Featured article December 8, 2009
Preceded by
Amanda Knox
ED5 Succeeded by
P-p-p-powerbook!
Anotheraetan.jpg
ED5
is part of a series on


The History of Encyclopedia Dramatica

[Seal ThemOpen the Records]

Events:
In Chronological Order

In the BeginningAttempted coup of the wikiRFJason CL ExperimentMay 2007Dancing sandwich warED turns 5Creation of the ED MascotED sued by Australian Human Rights CommissionsAustralian Media interviewSheneequa Turns FourGirlvinyl deletes "Niggers"DeHippo replaces ED with KYM cloneOperation RestorationNew ED founder v& ◆ We change domains over 9000 times for various, hilarious reasons ◆ EDF2 game on the newsED turns 10

During the Great Reign of ED:
Includes Timelines

2005200620072008200920102011201220132014201520162017

Other Notable Years:

1980s1990s2000s2010sY2KFuture2001200220032004

See Also:

ED GovernmentEncyclopedia Dramatica in the NewsDisgraced, Missing and Dead DramaticansTaking down ED