Elfen Lied

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Elfen Lied is a overrated low quality japanese shit manga/animu about some super lolis called the dicklonius that use vectors (kind of invisible arms) to kill people at leisure.

These dicklonius' seem to have all the same appearance, except with different hair cuts and slight differences in boob sizes. There are large amounts of guro, loli and splatter in this series, thus, great lulz is unavoidable.

Formerly deemed one of the best (if not the only good) animes in existence due to sheer shock value, this animu has been slowly but surely ruined by the 9,000+ pedo/angsty fanbois who fap over its very existence.

Main Characters

Some typical Elfen Lied scene


  • Lucy: Lucy is one of the first Diclonius (read: "Two Horned", or maybe just horny...) to appear. In her childhood, she lived in an orphanatory until she went apeshit. She raped over 9000 other people, until she was finally captured by some secret organization that holds all the dicklonius to pwn and to rape them until they die. Some shit happens, she escapes, br00tally killing at least 100 moar people in the process, and then finally gets shot in the head and acquires a fucktarded alter ego. She is then found trying to commit suicide near the ocean by Kouta and moves in with him.
  • Nyuu: The fucktarded version of Lucy, who is also a pervert. She is one of the major sources of fanservice in this anime, as she acts completely innocent and unaware of the laws of normal people (and probably the internetz), and instead acts like a retarded baby who enjoys pissing on the floor and moaning constantly, while saying "Nyuu~!" a million times over. She also loves taking off her clothes randomly and molesting naked people while they are having a bath.
  • Kouta: Kouta is the classic animu main character, except for the fact that he is an orphan, since all his family died last Thursday. His hobby is picking up any loli who lives in the streets, as well as staring at the ocean.
  • Yuka: Yuka is Kouta's cousin, she wants to be with her cousin, and she also gets jealous to the point of suicide at the slightest interaction of Kouta with another girl, especially in regards to Lucy/Nyuu.
  • Mayu: One of the many loli in the series, she lives in the streets since she escaped from being raped in the ass by her stepfather. Remember, raping is a polite way to say hello in Japan. Practice on family members and friends.
Nana after some bowling ball shots to her head and limbs in a secret facility.
  • Nana: Nana is a Diclonius, like Lucy, only that she is fucktarded, so she gets pwnd by Lucy easily, leaving her limbless. Later in the series, she tries to protect Kouta, resulting only in getting pwnd again by Mariko.
  • Mariko: The ultimate loli, she is the most powerful Diclonius evar, having at least 100 vectors and is around 8 years old. She was kept in a hibernative state for at least 100 years, and then promptly exploded her adoptive mother. Then she explodes after a while.
  • Bando: A mercenary and the only person who kills who isn't a dicklonius. His hobbies include raping loli and blasting the fuck out of everything. He dies twice but comes back to life through having his ball chopped off.

Trollng

While a great anime to watch full waste of time and brain cells (especially if you are a Sick fuck) the real question you are undoubtedly asking is how to piss off the fucktarded fanboi horde.

  • PLOT - there is none, and if you have watched it you would already know that. Nothing is ever really explained, just lots of nudity and gore. And more nudity and gore. In the end everybody dies. All fanbois deny this fact, and get particularly angry because they know it is the truth.
  • Characters - unrealistic (like most animes) and really annoying. Typical main character is excessively nice guy who has an aggressive over-protective girl sidekick, and manages to "accidentally" get multiple dickloniuses (and a fat homeless former rape loli) into his house (and seemingly with no BUTTSEX intentions). Also crazy sniper-dude who wants to KILL THE DEMONS and the creepy leader of the horngirl lab who turns out has horns himself.
  • Pedophilia - When 13 year old boys talk about this anime, they will call it "mature". By this they mean they see underage girl's naughty bits, as they do not yet realize real adults like stories that also have plot and character development. People who don't watch this anime for the lulz, or who do it more than once, are gigantic pedophiles and should be told so as much as possible.

Ratings

  • Action: 15
  • Lulz: 10 (Moar if you liek laughing at other people's sad, fucked up lives.)
  • Loli: 295
  • Mecha: 150
  • Guro: Over 9,000!

YouTube

Gallery


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