Emery Bowman

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Cat eyes.JPG
THIS PAGE IS BEING WATCHED BY ENEMIES OF THE LULZ.
BEWARE OF BUTTHURT REVISIONISM.
Emery Bowman 911.jpg

Emery Bowman is a chubby pig-nosed teenage boy who is known for being two-faced and trying too hard to fit in with the edgetards of The Ranting Community. He lives in a boring ghost town known as Maple City, Kansas, where he spends most of his time online fishing for attention. Due to his loneliness, Emery has a very clingy personality, and will naturally latch on to people he meets like a dog humping his owner's leg. Emery desperately craves the approval of others, and is known to shift his views on life to match those of the people he's closest to, even if it means betraying some people along the way.

YouTube

Emery's YouTube channel has more or less stayed the exact same way as it was in 2014. However, that's not to say that Emery hasn't changed up repertoire. But it's usually a downgrade (if you could believe it). These days, Emery's videos consist of him regurgitating points made by his "friends" as a vain attempt to impress them. Emery's content so far has consisted of;

Tard Guard

Tard Guard is best summed up as "Content Cop; Lite". Since Idubbbz and Emery are both people who rely on saying nigger as their source of comedy, Emery figured "Why not follow in his footsteps?". This renders Emery as nothing more than a lazy knock-off. Even the name "Tard Guard" was stolen from the countless unfunny memes him and his friends circlejerk. Different to Content Cop, Emery decides to eliminate any structure to his videos on users and strictly makes response videos. Although Emery has wiped most his videos from YouTube, you're not missing much.

All of the videos were just carbon copies of targets his so called friends had already responded to.


Emery following in his idol's footsteps'

The start of many Vegan related videos...


"Veganism"

Somewhere down the line, Emery's Tard Guard series quickly became 100% about Veganism. Again, you're not missing much. If you've seen one of his Vegan videos you've seen them all. They all repeat the general point that pwecious animals are being turned into bacon, and that makes Emery butthurt. Even though the people watching his channel agreed that nobody fucking cared, Emery continued anyway.

Interesting thing to note about Emery's Veganism, is that he's low-key Vegetarian. He'll secretly drink milk, and eat eggs, and ice-cream. Meanwhile he'll shame Vegetarians for being "too pussy" to be a Vegan. Not seeing the hypocrisy, Emery will continue to support the same industry he claims to have boycotted. It wouldn't be much of a surprise to find out that he's not even a Vegetarian either, those tasty Bacon burgers are too much for chunky Emery to give up.

File:Two sides of Emery.jpg
tfw you use the Vegan label to act superior for months then later clarify you're actually Vegetarian.

Edginess

Emery is the type of person who thinks swearing and suicide jokes make him the funniest human being alive. He'll pretend to cut himself, harass girls on Facebook, and even take pictures of himself naked. (This will come into play later.) Generally, people who are his "friends" will be made fun of. He's even gone so far as to invade their privacy. Emery also used to have dozens of YouTuber parodies on his channel, where he'd fail at improv and replace part of the YouTuber's name with "shit." Emery eventually realised how cancerous these videos were and removed them all.

Emery Dance.gif
Emery Bowman is a true ladies man.

Emery also thinks blurting out random catchphrases makes him look clever, and not autistic in the slightest.

   
 
What in God's vagina.
 

 
 

   
 
Anywhore.
 

 
 

   
 
Consume.
 

 
 

   
 
Ayy lmao
 

 
 

—Emery loves forced memes.

   
 
EARTHQUAKE WARNING!
 

 
 

Not So Slim Shady

iMustDestroyAll and ReaperTakinOver react to Emery's rap album.

Like any other middle-class white boy, Emery is a big fan of Eminem. He owns an Eminem poster, attempted to start a rap career, and even went so far as to bleach his hair. Well, at least he's not a juggalo.

Hitler would be proud.

Advice For Emery From Filthy Frank


Eminem poster

Ass Kissing

Emery Bowman's sycophantic behavior has made him lose many people's respect (if he had their respect in the first place). He's like that obsessive girlfriend that calls you every 5 minutes; the only difference is you're not going to let him give you head. Emery is known to spam people's inboxes trying to flatter them, and then beg them to join his Skype calls. He'll also attack people just to gain someone else's approval. Even after betraying somebody, Emery will play it off like he's innocent and plead for their forgiveness.

NOTICE ME SENPAI

Dear Paul, I wrote you but you still ain't callin'

I left my cell, my pager, and my home phone at the bottom


Emery's Trolling Backfires

Last Thursday, Emery was in a Skype call with his "friends" Levon and BurnCoalition. Emery thought it would be lulzy to send RanterInShade's parents a link to Shade's YouTube channel, since they would make him delete his account if they found out about his videos. Emery, being the suck-up he is, later tried to pass it of as nothing personal and that he was just "kidding". However, Levon used a nude picture of Emery as blackmail if Emery told anyone that Levon had a part in it. Then Emery sent a screenshot of the messages he sent RanterInShade's parents to Shades himself.

Emery Trolls RanterInShades.jpg
Pedobear approves.

Just to be on the safe side, Levon sent the nude picture to Razorath and told him to use it as blackmail. Razorath, not knowing what "blackmail" means, decided to make Emery the butt of the joke, so he sent the picture to TheRandomGangsta and RanterInShades. Then as an act of revenge, RanterInShades and OfficialGATG shared the picture on Facebook. Emery later tried to apologize to Shades, but Shades told him to fuck off.

Emery Nude.jpg
RanterInShades Tells Off Emery.jpg

Emery's Life Goals

It turns out our little failed abortion has some high expectations in life.
Emery Bowman Life Goals.jpg

Life Goals Accomplished

Tumbleweed.gif

Tumbleweed.gif

Here Comes Dad To Save The Day

EmeryDad.png

Recently, Emery's dad had found this article and attempted to white knight his son by blanking the entire thing. Noble, but seeing as how this is a wiki and blankings can be undone in 2 seconds, It was all in vain, earning him a swift, hot stack of bancakes, his vandalism reverted, even more drama to contribute, and proof that the username he chose described him perfectly. Thanks!

Misc.

Emery in trouble with the law.
[Collapse GalleryExpand Gallery]


See Also

Typical fan art

Emery Bowman
is part of a series on
YouTube Ranters

[Get terminatedStart ranting]

JewTube Logo.png

Emery Bowman is part of a series on YouTube.

[CollapseExpand]

A-BC-DE-FG-HI-JK-LM-NO-PQ-RS-TU-VW-XY-Z#

Visit the YouTube Portal

A Message From Chad and SteveA hunter shoots a bearAJcomixAaronEverettLandAbsenceOfTheAbsentAddison MikkelsonAdeleADoseOfBuckleyAeverine NievesAfr0blu3Afro NinjaAgoraphobic-BlueAkaichouAkewsticRockRAleksandr PistoletovAlexander4488Alexander4488/Approved ED PageAlexander4488/Director CommentaryAlexandercarneiroAlex MacRaeAlix HenriolAlphawerewolffAlyallieAmazingplatypus69Amber ButtrumAmerica's Third PartyAngelofthyNightAngry GrandpaAngry Homo KidAngry Video Game NerdAngryLittleGiriAnonymousNastyAnonymousThoughtAnthony 'A-Log' LoGattoAnti-Flagger Association of YouTubeAntiDisneyMovementAntoine DodsonApplemilk1988AquagirlwhitefoxArceusfan2013Ardi RizalArgent009Armake21AsalieriAshlea ClaytonASMRAstablaziaAtJap13Atheist Scum UnitedAtheneAttackofthehankAudreynolandAush0kAustin FullmerAutoplayAxelswife1AyumihamiltonB WalmerBaaaBags of MoneyBananaphoneBANGSBarefoot NatureBarmer479Bart the GeneralBattimBeebee890BenthelooneyBetabyteiphoneBigBadFurgyTheFoxBikerfoxBill122460Billoon45BLACKB0NDBLACKbusterCriticBlasphemy ChallengeBleedingFireWolfBloodraptorBludshot the HedgehogBlueshineWolfBlunty3000Bob RehahnBodrochowskiBodyXPoliticBoh3m3BoxxyBravesgirl5BreakBrett KeaneBrokeTheInterwebBroncofn90BrookersBurger the Angry CatBURKBus Uncle

CRoadwarriorCaddicarusCakefartsCallumCartelCapnOAwesomeCaptainAtheistCaramelldansenCarl FiadinoCartoonjunkieCash MasterCassiusPlejarenAlienChad "Atheist Killa" ElliottChad HurleyChadwardennChancepsychChangeDaChannelCharlestrippyCharlie Bit Me - Again!Cheeseburger JoshCheetawolfChekovsgunCheryl ShumanChismahChloe DykstraChosonNinjaChrissy ChambersChris CrockerChris-chan/VideosChristianHillbillyChuggaaconroyCid SilverwingCid and Conners Excellent AdventureCircaRigelCirnoClay ClaymoreClayranger89CodenamesailorearthCodenamesailorearth/2nd Wikia SagaCodenamesailorearth/2nd Wikia Saga/BlacklistCodenamesailorearth/ED SagaCodenamesailorearth/The BeginningCokeman2423Colleen ThomasCooking With Jack ShowCopperCabCorey MargeraCoughlan666Crazy GideonCrazyvideosandrantsCriss AngelCropperbCrossmackCrunkcoreCrystal ShinkleCubbyCulexorCulexor/YouTubeCuntFuckBitchCupcake DogCutechongCutiePieMarziaCwilliams1976CyanterroristDJ KEEMSTARDaddyOFiveDaHaloChickDamaronDamien EstreichDan144xDandCVideosDangermanDanielspengiesDarknessthecurseDarksidered992DarkspeedsDarkzero63DashieGamesDavid After DentistDavid HockeyDavidsfarmDaxFlameDbootsthedivaDcigsDear SisterDeleting Your YouTube VideosDemcadDenalynnnDerek JeevesDerpaviangottDigitalSurgeonDiGiTiLsOuLDiaper BoyDie AntwoordDips Tobacco RedneckDLAbaoaquDog264Donnie DaviesDouble RainbowDoubleSAnimationsDownfallDr. OctogonapusDr. TranDr4g0nK1dDraconas RayneDrewtoothpasteDrinkingwithbobDrossRotzankDrp1zzaDylan KimberlinDynaCatlovesme

EdaremEddward4evaEduard KhilEgoraptorEinsidlerElevator FilmingEmmalinaEmogirl21Encyclopedia Dramatica:YouTube Improvement DriveEpic Beard ManEpic meal timeEpic Rap Battles of HistoryEpicKitty54EricDouglaceEvalionExhibit AExhibit B-5ExoParadigmGamerFail ArmyFakeSaganFake SchizophreniaFanimeFatmanFelinoidFelipenetoFergie OlverFilthy FrankFilthywhoreFirithfenionFists The EchidnaFlirty The FoxFluffy teh wolffouseyTUBEFrank BonafedeForeverKailynForum TrollingFrank'sVoiceFredFredryk PhoxFreeman's MindFriends of A-LogFrosty the SnowmanFuture the rapperFuturisticHubFCTC

Gaijin GoombahGame GrumpsGame TheoryGangstaElijahGay kissGeerupGen ZedGeorge CarlinGeorge SodiniGeorge4titleGerald CelenteGet A New DaddyGigiGimme PizzaGimmeabreakmanGinger GenocideGingerslapGloria TeschGoddessMilleniaGodofUnicornsGolimarGoosh GooshGorgeous GeorgeGorilla199Gothguurl1989Gothreaper1GothzillaGradeAUnderAGraeme Stephen TuckerGreenTeaGirlieGreg SolomonGreyson ChanceGuntherGurigorloXHaydendaftH.J. FreaksHIVchickHannah CrappsHappy Tree FriendsHarder, Better, Faster, StrongerHatedwerewolfHatersHellionExciterHinaUchiHoney BadgerHonorzHotel MarioHowToBasicHyperCharge

I Hate EverythingI Like TurtlesI just wanted to make it snowIckeriss69IDubbbzTVIgnoredImclosetfreeImmelmannInception CatInmendhamIntellectual CheckmateInterior Crocodile AlligatorInuboy1000Irate GamerIrish282Iron Man NumbersItalian SpidermanItsAboutJesusItssaphiragoreJackSepticeyeJDubsJacobDarkgodJacob SartoriusJamichJared MiltonJason SteeleJasonspeaksJawsusJay WakefieldJeffree StarJennifer Lynn PetkovJessi SlaughterJessica BeagleyJessica ValentiJewish Internet Defense ForceJewWarioJezuzFreek777JfreedanJim ProfitJoe SomebodyJoey BootsJoeysworldtourJohn KatehisJohnny RebelJonah MowryJonas BrothersJonTronJon SudanoJoseph KonyJoseph8276JoshU2uberJoshwa PlasticJuggaletteJennyJustin BieberJwriter4

K00lAIDGIRLKNIGHTRIDAHKaa VFXKai the HitchhikerKathera LockharteKatherine MarionKathleen ToddKatiesopinionKatiethesinger123Kersal MassiveKevin SmithKeyboard CatKicesieKim PetrasKimberleighKingMasterReviewKissingTheWolfKitty0706Know Your MemeKobidobidogKoraxKrappleGuyKripparrianKrispy KremeKrystle ColeKSIKumichooKyle ForrestKäpt'n Balu Und Seine Tollkühne CrewL.U.L.Z.LILSHOWSTOPPALa PequeñaLaci GreenLaddergoatLadyALT69LambiSinClairLatarian MiltonLee WestwickLegion of NowayLeisureSuitGamingLeisureSuitGaming/NoDateGamersLeprechaunLesleybloodLet's PlayLexi BeeLexshit BleuuaaaarghLia Marie JohnsonLiam SullivanLifeInATentLilypichuLimapal00zaLinkaraLisanovaLittleKuribohLoganSperman2Lonelygirl15LopunnyLordZedd16LordshadrachLouisthehedgehogLowtax/YouTubeLukeywes1234Lulz in hell TrollfagsLyle McDouchebagLynn AnnLyor Cohen

METOKURMMORPG Freak OutMRirianMachinimaMagicalPockyUsagiMajelaZeZeDiamondManlytearsMannixThePirateMariozplazeMariotehplumberMark GormleyMarkiplierMars DefdenMaruMatt ShizzleMax HarrisMaxofs2dMcJuggerNuggetsMeganLeeHeartMeganSpeaksMeleeKirbyMemy9909Michael GimsonMichael JacksonMichelle PhanMickyy MooMike MateiMillion Dollar ExtremeMilo StewartMisha SilenostiMissHannahMinxMister MetokurMogalfulMonica PunkMonkeyGameGuidesMontagraphMorbid KrabsMorganAnsonMr BeastMr PregnantMrDisambiguationMrpunchdrunk1MrRepzionMsHeartAttackMuffdaddy2MustDestroyAllMyIDIsPhatMylarBalloonFanMySpace KidMysteriousMrEnterMysteryGuitarManNOT THE BEESNaltsNarcovideoNateTalksToYouNaviiNekoNeedledropNephilimFreeNephilimFree/Debate SagasNephilimFree/Misc.AsshatteryNephilimFree/The Anniepies DocumentsNessaluNichole337Nick BateNick BravoNick ChaleunphoneNiggest Crook ForceNikky RaneyNornnaNothing ToxicNuttymadam3575Nyan Cat

OfficialGATGOH GOD BILLOH MAN OH GODOld Spice GuyOldnataliedeeOmegaloreOneLessGodOnisionOperation Fat FuckOperation YewtubeOperation YouTubeOschaperOz KangarooPacificoceanasiaPaperliliesPat CondellPaul "Fetch" CarnesPaul Joseph WatsonPekka-Eric AuvinenPekitiPeppermintPattiPerez HiltonPeter SchiffPewDiePiePhantom409PigslopPissedOffVideoGamerPit ViperPixelBeeProductionsPMRantsPooh's AdventuresPreacher717Producing101ProJaredProper Words SongPyrobooby

RJ BandsmaRandomlaughingmanRational Response SquadRay William JohnsonRaymond45154RealaloverRealman1000000000000Rebecca BlackRed Shirt GuyRedlenses2112Red MinusRemi GaillardRenettoRetro Video Game KidsReymon14Riley34470RMG ProductionsRobotnikRobtranRon SaveloRonBudda6699RootbrianRorschachRowdyCRubeus EdenRucka Rucka Ali

SKWEEZYSONYFANBOYSailormoonred1SammyClassicSonicFanSandro L JeanSanjaya/JSargon of AkkadSaturnine FilmsSave AaliyahScarredFurrySchool Bus FightScott DeiCasScottHermanFitnessSegacampSerialKillaCSesshReincarnatedSeto-Kaiba.comSetsuna ToushirouShane DawsonShane LeeSharolaidShaycarlSherry ShrinerShockOfGodShocked and Appalled CatShon TerryShoobySimply OkamiSimply SaraSindragonSirius OrionisSittin On Tha ToiletSkueeSmell Yo DickSmogon UniversitySmorekitty97SmpfilmsSnackyCakes2008SnowVhiteSokiTwopawSonadowclubSonic X BloopersSony VegasSpaghettiosSparkling WigglesSpax3SpeakoniaSSSniperWolfStarlaglamSteAndKelStealth CatSteve ChenStu makes chocolate pudding at 4 in the morningSusan BoyleSwitchiedaggerSxephilSynchtubeTL;DWTabbyTablecowTaekesiTails DollTamias the ChipmunkTammyToeTay ZondayTay Zonday/CRLyricsTechaTedjesuschristgodTeenage Tourettes CampTehbigtoasterTerror PlaylistTh3RoyismThat Guy With The GlassesThatkidparkerThdrksideThe Annoying OrangeThe Barney BunchThe CaseyThe DickridersThe Domino's YouTube IncidentThe Failkips Strikes BackThe Fine BrosThe Florida Tweenie RapistsThe Harlan ShowThe Kewl KidsThe Incredible Flying Broomstick GuyThe MoleThe Mulberry EightThe NutshackThe Online GamerThe Slow Mo GuysThe Spoony ExperimentThe Spoony Experiment/Spoony and FriendsThe TrashmanThe Troll HunterThe Unknown AutobotThe Young TurksTheAmazingAtheistTheArchfiendTheHill88TheMrXshowTheQuestionMarkManTheRedSkullTheSockDetectiveTheSuperRobotSoujaOGThedramatubeThemaskedanalystThenintendo3ds2TherealagerbonTheresa ShellerThewinekoneThink B4 You SpeakThree Wolf MoonThunderf00tTime MagazineTimmygalTimmysmommy01TinaecmusicTolstoyKafkaEvskyTom SersonTommy JordanTommy SotomayorTommypezmasterTonettaTonetta777Tony48219TonystockertTori BelliachiTotalbiscuitTourette's GuyTranime GirlTrevor RiegerTrey Eric SeslerTriciakittyTrickshottingTriggerfoxTrollsNewsTrollsOfTerrorTrololoTroyriserTruthfulChristianTsimFuckisTunakTurtle PunchTwilightSucksTwizidwickedletteTwiztidAshTwo Girls One FingerTyler Redick

UTubeDramaUlrichthehedgehogUltimate Muscle Roller LegendUltimateUKFFFanUndertakerfreak1127UnMaskingTheTruthUnstrappdUnsubscribingUpDownMostlyVaLLarrrValisHDValleyfeverVampiricSpektorVegan GainsVennu MalleshVenomFangXVenomFangX/CriticismVenomFangX/Online DramaVenusangelicVerdmidious ReznovVicious Dog ManVideo Game ReviewersVideoGameDunkeyVioletkitty411ViperVipor231Vipor231/YouTubeVipor231/YoutubeVirus-20VloggerheadsVoicEverythingVonHeltonVsauce

Walls Fall OutWarisartWattageWeatherManKevinWeathercatWeegeeisgoingtokillmWilliamsleddWilly bum bumWindows Movie MakerWise Beard ManWolfAdvocateWolfeedarkfangWolfeedarkfang/supportersWolfeedarkfang/videosWorld of LongplaysWwedx2007X people YXatuXiao RishuXRazorfistxXrissXrowXxPrincessPunkxx

YIFF! The MusicalYTwatchdogYokeupYouLoveMollyYouNooberYouTubeYouTube Anti-Troll ClubYouTube AvatarsYouTube Civil WarYouTube CommentariesYouTube Deaf JamYouTube Furry WarYouTube Independence DayYouTube PoopYouTube Poop: The MovieYouTube Rape VideoYouTube RatingsYouTube StaffYouTube Street TeamYouTube Subscriber HackYouTube Super FagsYouTube Thomas ClubYouTube View FraudYouTube VigilantesYouTube War ExpertYouTube Yahweh ClanYoufloodYoung Tubers UnitedYoung Tubers United/The Trades ArticleYoungdefiantYounger Woolwich BoyzYourTubeNewsYoutube NobodiesYtaskYuki DamonZenArcherZilianOPZzz33333

001rich10003bgood1000 Degree Knife vs X1guy1knee2xSpeedStacksDaniel3GI Industries7ols7seveng7911bio-med916power~jsСобака Бэ бэ бэээ