Felching

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Your mom and your sister at your family reunion

Felching refers to a popular party game that involves sucking semen out of a vagina or an anus. Usually the vagina or anus belongs to someone else, but self-felching can be achieved via four separate methods:

  1. Participant is ludicrously flexible
  2. A really long straw is involved (for best results, suspend vagina or anus above the head so that the semen is forced down the throat, similar to a beer bong)
  3. Participant has ribcage removed so as to provide more leverage and flexibility. This last method is known as the Marylin Manson Method.
  4. Thinking with portals!

Felching provides a unique flavor and is for this reason generally reserved to gormands and other Epicureans. Rumors suggest that certain secret, elite restaurants for the extremely wealthy have freshly felched semen on their menus. For VIPs only, that is. Mostly CEOs. Excellent with a garnish of parsley.

Felching can also refer to the insertion of animals into the rectum--commonly small rodents like gerbils, octopi, hamsters, and eels. Feltcho, however, can fit his Jack Russell terrier inside his ass.

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