Georgia

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Georgia Atlanta Tbilisi.JPG
President Saakashvili, IRL troll
A Georgian man preparing to unwrap a traditional chocolate Stalin.

Georgia is an unofficial state of North America in the Caucasus Mountains, squeezed between legions of boozed-up, trigger-happer Russkies to the North and hoardes of Sandniggers to the South, who will zerg rush cum suicide bomb at the slightest provocation. The population of Georgia is 4.3 million, most of which are tribal mountain dwellers who fap while guarding their goats. Georgia is known as Sakartvelobantustan[1] in their native tongue but abroad as the land which unleashed Joseph Stalin on the world.

The leader of Georgia is a batshit insane[2] gazillionaire French Jew by the name of Bidzina Ivanishvili, who succeeded a wise and charismatic man known as Mikheil Saakashvili, known for his ability to do old-school ethnic cleansing and then rationalize it away with a cheery smile on Charlie Rose.

Georgians had some ancient independent kingdoms in the past and insist they were great warriors despite being repeatedly pawned by tiny littles Azns, Timur who destroyed it 6 times for the lulz, gay Turks, perfume-soaked Persians and finally by the retrograde Russkies. However, one thing stands out: they were among the first Christfag States ever, having been converted by some slut named Saint Nino.

When the Rotten Soviet Empire disintegrated because of poor economic planning (each family was allocated 7 rusty assault tanks and two toilet-paper squares per year, for example), the Georgians were happy to taste freedom once again. However, tragedy soon struck, as some dipshit pointed out to the Russkies that the fuel and gas they were sitting on could be exchanged for Dollars and Euros. Feeling powerful again, they wanted their empire back and backed separatists movements in Georgia retarded enough to want to rejoin an autocratic Russia. Moreover, the Russians were upset since Georgia's president refused to suck Vladimir Putin's clearly longer than average penis. Vladimir Putin had made it clear that BJs were expected from all of Russia's satellite nations. President Saakashvili refused, thinking it wiser to join NATO and suck up to the Jews.

tl;dr = the South Ossetian War

In 2008, the Georgians tried to take back a separatist enclave called South Ossetia. Basically, they bombed and shelled an entire city, and then invaded and began the necessary task of ethnically cleansing the subhuman, non-Georgian population. Unbeknownst to them was the fact that the Russkies had cunningly given the South Ossetians Russian passports, making them officially citizens of the Russian Federation. Many South Ossetians had already used their Russkie passports as toilet paper, but there were still enough "Russian citizens" in danger to justify rolling in South Ossetia with the entire Red Army. The Russians, despite having a 75:1 numerical advantage, took heavy losses due to their faith in the "charge, comrades, until enemy run out of bullets" soviet battle doctrine. Eventually, they did assrape Georgia with their sheer numbers and Vladimir Putin, escorted by more than 9000 tanks entered the capital of Georgia in his luxury Lada to receive the customary blowjob from president Saakashvili.

Later, in an interview on Charlie Rose, Mikheil Saakashvili explained, with a boyish smile, that sucking Vladimir Putin's cock was akin to licking a clitoris and that all Russian men should first practice on Vlad's pussy. Putin does not understand English and it is said that no one of his entourage has told him of the prank for fear of "mysteriously" dying of a Polonium-210 spiced meal or in a SMG-bullet peppered room.


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