Giant Thumbs

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Not fully evolved

Giant thumbs are Darwin's cruel joke on Generation Y where the normal size human thumb is evolving into a hueg digit out of all proportion to the rest of the hand thanks to teenagers's excessive texting and gaming habits.


 
 
I have a very strong suspicious that my children will all have thumbs that are flat on the outside. Hubby's been playing all types of TV games for almost 18 years now. His thumbs are flat on the outside. Mine are not looking like that and I text a lot. So probably, in a generation or two, you'll be able to identify "gamer families" by their thumbs.
 

 


The Evolving Thumb

The human thumb throughout history has been used in opposition to fingers for grasping things. Today, the thumb has taken on new prominence (hitchhikers notwithstanding) among digits as it is used more and more as a communication tool for text messaging on cell phones and other hand-helds.

According to experts, there may be some genetically based extra neural connection that could allow one to text message faster. Faster text messaging could get one a better job (yeah, right...) and allow one to have more kids to inherit ones thumb gene (because we all know it's the rich people, who have a fuckton of children). That would be evolving.


 
 
People could have been evolving a better text-messaging thumb gene for 100,000 years, but it didn't do any good until BlackBerrys came around. It could be a capacity that some had that suddenly became advantageous.
 

 

—Expert


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See Also

External Links

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