Donate to ED • Donors • Advertise on ED
Golden iPod
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
The Golden iPod Award is given to one person who managed to become an hero (i.e. commit suicide) in a lulzy way and bring joy to the interwebs. There can only be one Golden iPod each year, and the competition is very tough. The first person ever to receive an Golden iPod was Mitchell Henderson, for his drama-inducing self-pwnage and subsequent posthumous pioneering of the phrase "an hero".
Contents |
Requirements for the Golden iPod Award
- The person must have become an Hero.
- There must be drama involved.
- The person must have become an hero in a lulzy way.
An Hero, 2006
For becoming the first person to receive the An Hero title and for bringing many lulz to the internets. Mitchell showed us that death does not have to be sad, but could in fact be quite hilarious. For losing his iPod and creating a new classic meme in the process, Mitchell Henderson lives on in our hearts and in our hard drives, and receives the Golden iPod Award of 2006.
2007
Nominees
- Chris Benoit
- Ben Vodden
- Broady Paul Ledet
- Charmaine Dragun
- Jodie Gater and Stephanie Gestier
- Kevin Neil Whitrick
- Cho Seung-Hui
- Pekka-Eric Auvinen
- Asa Coon
- Tyler Dumstorf
An Winner
For performing the amazing feat of 32 * over 9000 kills (33 31 if you count his self-pwning; suicide penalty, lulz), a high score which has yet to be broken learn to history (Port Arthur massacre)(BRB Jail, Not An Hero - Epic win: Uiryeong massacre). But also for spawning major drama, lulz, and controversy on the interwebs. Cho also posted a tape of himself making lulzy threats, which has become a famed and legendary video. Mr. Seung-Hui even became a meme, and even today, there are still people posting his image on the web.
2008
Nominees
- Codey "Code Red" Porter
- Hannah "Black Parade" Bond
- Megan "Bulling Is Rabbit" Meier
- Jake "An Wii-ro" Roberts
- Joshua "An Halo" Nimm
- Matti "The Finnisher" Saari
- Shaun "GET ON WITH IT?" Dykes
- Abraham "Candyjunkie" Biggs
- Bruce "Satan Claus" Pardo
Disqualified nominees
- Heath Ledger -- He overdosed by accident, he never meant to become an hero. His OD wasn't even worth a darwin award, unlike Codey Porter.
- Brandon Crisp -- He had a luzly brawl with his parents, like Jake "An Wii-ro" Roberts, but he did not run out in the woods to kill himself. He fell from a tree by accident, which is a unfunny death. Brandon Crisp was disqualified even though he is popular and did bring many lulz to the internets and a specific image board. If Brandon jumped from a cliff or hanged himself from that tree, he could have won the game.
- Sam Leeson -- Even though he spawned some lulz on 4chan and Bebo, he was nominated too late. PROTIP: nominate people before the voting starts.
An Winner
Bruce Jeffrey Pardo has won 2008's Golden iPod Award for the incredibly lulzy task of dressing up like Santa Claus on Christmas eve, knocking on his in-laws' door while they were having a Christmas party, and shooting an 8 year old girl in the face when she answered. He subsequently went on to pwn 9 people in all, including himself, but not before burning the house down with a flamethrower. The only explanation possible for this act is that he was extremely horny? Bruce Jeffrey Pardo was an amazing individual, but not least of all, he was An Hero.
2009
Nominees
Disqualified
- Nidal Malik "AbduWali" Hasan - Despite Getting Forth Place on the Southeast Regional High Score Leaderboard, he hereby has been Disqualified after Æ's judges decided that paralyzation does not count as An Hero of the legs.
- David Carradine - Even though his death was self inflicted with help from an asian hooker, David Carradines death was not planned nor lulzy. Æ's judges decided that you gotta have intent to become an hero. Carradine is out.
An Winner
Tony48219 won 2009's Golden iPod Award for going on a road trip to kill a negro Boxxy for hating on his religion. He has earned the respect of his fellow man for truly standing up for what he believes in.
2010
By default, it goes to OldDirtyBtard. Rest in peace bro.
On Saturday, October 30, OldDirtyBtard was martyred by the Pharisitic bastards at the Church of Scientology. The cause of death was labeled suicide, and the police refuse to investigate the issue further. He will be sorely missed. As ODB was a career alcoholic, over-aged EDiots (a word invented by the Captain himself) are advised to take a shot in remembrance.
2011
The Golden iPod for 2011 goes to The Sherrodocracy. Because of the valiant suicide of Encyclopedia Dramatica dot com, we were able to rise from the ashes and become the ED that ED was meant to be.
2012
The 2012 Golden iPod winner is Amanda Todd. A 16 year old girl who got bullied in school for fucking some dude who had a girlfriend because he pretended to love her. She also camwhored online and ended up having to change schools three times because some pedo tried to blackmail her for more nudes and kept posting her tits on Facebook for all her classmates to see when she refused. She eventually was "bullied" into becoming an hero by drinking bleach hanging herself, on her third suicide attempt. She drank bleach during her first attempt, but survived after having her stomach pumped.
Close seconds: An autistic hero named Adam Lanza who committed the very lulzy act of pwning his mother, stealing her guns, using those guns to pwn 20 kids and 6 adults at the local elementary school, and then shooting himself.
2013
This year's winner is hyper-nigger Chris Dorner. Notable for inciting a county-wide manhunt after he published a manifesto and went out on a killing spree against the police who fired him. Finally he was cornered in a cabin in the woods which the police set on fire to try and smoke him out. But black rambo would not be taken so easily and he took the express train to hell instead with a close range headshot.
Other Nominees
- Aaron Swartz - Emo reddit jew.
- Ariel Castro - Killed himself in jail after being incarcerated for snatching up all the white girls.
See Also
| Featured article January 1, 2009 | ||
| Preceded by Nurse-kun | Golden iPod | Succeeded by The Great ImageFap Troll |


