Grudgewank

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Technically masturbating to this is also a grudgewank.

Grudgewank is that urge, that flaming desire that rises up in some people.

It is the urge to bring down someone or several someones because they made you hurt or offended over something that happened a long ass time ago.

Signs of someone bearing Grudgewank

  • A single incident magically becomes "all the time" or becomes an extreme, unforgivable crime that sparks an intense vendetta for no reason
  • Making things up about the person(s) in question
  • Making exaggerated claims of rightfulness to be hurt about made up things
  • Telling everyone on your LiveJournal or MySpace blog about this incident, then rallying their support and feeding them more lies to keep them convinced
  • Leading some kind of self-righteous crusade to destroy everything you don't like, while everyone loses sight of what exactly started the grudgewank to begin with.
  • Writing a shitty attack article on Encyclopedia Dramatica.
  • You are Onigojirakaiju.

Possible cures include ignoring wankers and acting pleasant instead of crying about it.

Fantard Variant

   
 
*gasp* Joel Schumacher is history's greatest monster! Get him!
 

 
 

Robot Chicken shows just how pathetic it is (1:53)

One common version of grudgewank is to instead hold an eternal hate towards some creative work and its creator. Rather than just quietly acknowledging they wasted two hours and a couple hundred megabytes of bandwidth pirating a movie and moving on with their lives, they instead make it their solemn duty to find every last avenue of discussion where they can bring it up as a topic so they can rant and rave about the evils of some shitty film.

While this would be acceptable if it was done for the lulz, they're most emphatically serious about making sure they spread what they see to be the inalienable truth and correct strangers for having the wrong opinion on the internet. It is a sad and pathetic display of everything wrong about organized fandom made worse by the fact that at least the typical fantard basing their identity around some shitty Nickelodeon OMG RANDOM cartoon at least have a positive association with their obsession. They then only become valuable as lolcows via White Knighting the object of their hatred.


[Case ClosedOpen Up to Us]
Grudgewank is part of a series on Psychology
Antisocial personality disorder Hannibal Lector.jpg Mental illness & Disorders

AcrotomophiliaAddictionAgoraphobiaAlcoholismAlexis Pilkington SyndromeAlzheimer'sAnorexiaAntisocial personality disorderAnthropophobiaAnxietyADDADHDAsperger's SyndromeAutismBimboficationBipolarBorderline personality disorderBug ChasingBulimiaDeep thinkerDepressionDick ImpalementDown's SyndromeDyslexiaEating disorderFactitious disorderFake SchizophreniaFauxlimiaFeminismGender dysphoriaGirl on the Internet SyndromeHeterophobiaHero ComplexHFAHistrionic Personality DisorderHutchence's SyndromeHyperbolimiaInadequacyInconsistent personality disorderInsanityLiberal Butthurt SyndromeLow Self-esteem'Missing White Woman' SyndromeMultiple personality disorderNapoleon ComplexNarcissistic personality disorderNeurotypicalObsessive Compulsive DisorderParanoiaParanoid personality disorderPeter Pan SyndromePost-Traumatic Stress DisorderPsychopathyRetardationSchizophreniaSeasonal Affective DisorderSelf-diagnosisSelf InjurySexsomniaSickfuckerySociopathySocial anxiety disorderSpecial Snowflake SyndromeTrolling Induced Transsexuality SyndromeTulpaUnrealistic expectationsVictim complex

Fetishes:

AcrotomophiliaAquaphiliaArborphiliaAudiophiliaAutogynephiliaBalloon FetishBestialityCarmen Electra complexCross DressingDollfiliaEmetophiliaEmosexualityEproctophiliaFatty Fetish (Female Fat Admirer) • FetishismFoot FetishFurniture PornFurrismGoo girlGuroHeterophiliaHomophiliaInflation FetishJapanophiliaJungle FeverLesbian pedophiliaLotion PlayMacrophiliaMaiesiophiliaMechanophiliaMpregNecrophiliaObjectophiliaOedipial ComplexParaphiliaPedophiliaPlushophiliaPregnant LoliPregnophiliaQuicksand FetishRangerphiliaSpectrophiliaStatuephiliaTrichophiliaVoraphiliaWet and Messy FetishismWetlookXenophiliaYellow feverZoophilia

E-Psychosis:

Chronic Troll SyndromeDeletionismE-goE-PsychiatristE-PsychiatryETDHivemindI-DosingI have a 140 IQIRC DiseaseImaginary girlfriendInternet Disease & Internet Disease ChartInternet poverty delusionsInternet RehabInternet troll personality disorderMega ultra super geniusNerdy Fandom Gateway TheorySex by associationLulz-BlindnessWikipedia's Greatest Hits Diseases

Experiments:

ask.fmBrainwashingHypnosisMilgram ExperimentScientologyStanford Prison ExperimentThe Hivemind Corollary

Sites:

Above Top SecretB/Bodies Under SiegeCYOCChatrouletteDefense Industries OrganizationDeekerFoolQuest.comInkBunnyNeuticles.comPsyke.orgWarpMyMind.com

See also:

American Psychiatric AssociationAngerASMRChild abuseConscienceDreamDSMEnlightenmentIntelligenceLobotomyPsychiatristySerial KillersTake the meat bridgeThe Law of ConformityTrigger Warning