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What? This article needs moar cartoony graphics to illustrate various incidents in the history of the universe.
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Thetans hear a large popping noise and go to investigate what they later discover is the beginning of the universe
The famous story of Lord Xenu, a tiny but important event in our history
And then...
Then of course...
Fucking body thetans
DC8 JOY.jpg

According to the infinitely wise and authoritative scriptures of the Church of ScientologyTM, the History of the Universe goes like this:

  • 70 trillion trillion trillion trillion trillion trillion trillion years ago (7×1085 years): The Story of Creation Implants
  • 40.7 trillion trillion trillion trillion years ago to 5.9 trillion trillion trillion trillion trillion years ago (4.07×1049–5.9×1060 years): The Glade Implants are implanted
  • 83 trillion trillion trillion years ago to about 40.7 trillion trillion trillion trillion years ago (8.3×1036–4.07×1049 years): The Bear Goals are implanted
  • 110,000 trillion trillion years ago or earlier to 390 trillion trillion years ago (1.1×1029–3.9×1026 years): The Invisible Picture Goals implants are implanted by an unknown alien race
  • 390 trillion trillion years ago to 370 trillion trillion years ago (3.9×1026–3.7×1026 years): The Black Thetan Goals are implanted
  • 4 quadrillion years ago (4×1015 years): Thetans enter the present universe and experience Incident I
  • 382 trillion years ago to 52 trillion years ago (3.82×1014–5.2×1013 years): The Helatrobus Implants are implanted
  • 319 trillion years ago to 83 trillion trillion trillion years ago (3.19×1014–8.3×1036 years): The Gorilla Goals Implants
  • 315 trillion years ago to 216 trillion years ago (3.15×1014–2.16×1014 years): The Aircraft Door Goals are implanted
  • 80 trillion years ago (8×1013 years): The Galactic Confederacy is established
  • 52 trillion years ago (5.2×1013 years): The Helatrobus government is established
  • 44 trillion years ago (4.4×1013 years, "43,891,832,611,177 years, 344 days, 10 hours, 20 minutes and 40 seconds from 10:02½ PM Daylight Greenwich Time May 9, 1963"): The Heaven Implants are given by Helatrobus
  • 38 trillion years ago (3.8×1013 years): Helatrobus falls or is destroyed

It should be noted that all dates given above are far beyond the current scientific consensus for the age of the present universe (approximately 13.7 billion [1.37×1010] years). However, if you have a calculator, please check my math.

  • 75 million years ago (7.5×107 years): Xenu commits his famous genocide and brainwashes his victims with the R6 Implants
  • 50 million years ago (5×107 years): The Body Builder Incident
  • 200,000 years ago (2×105 years): The Marcab Confederacy is established
  • "Hundreds of years ago to hundreds of thousands of years ago":- The Marcab Invasion Force implants thetans with the Train Goals
  • Circa 6235 BC: The Fifth Invader Force invades the Solar System but is defeated by the Fourth Invader Force
  • AD 1150: The Espinol abandon our Solar System

OK, so how does this work out if you tried to explain it in detail?

The following is the actual sekrit leaked dox of LolRon's crazed ranting/trolling about the actual history of the universe. I think this is only part of it, but as I don't see Xenu in this batch. TL;DR? more like TL;OH SHI- amirite? This guy wasn't bad in the imagination department, I don't think anyone was supposed to take all this stuff seriously.


From about 256 trillion trillion years ago to about 370 trillion trillion years ago the GPMs are the Bear Goals.

These use the same pattern, similar amusement park arrangements, the same type of goals as the Gorilla Goals.

The only real difference is that instead of a mechanical gorilla a mechanical or live bear was used, and the motion was even more violent.

There is, however, a change of pattern in the Bear Goals in that TWO RIs were added.

These come as a pair just below "The Vast Value of Goaling.

"They are oppterm "Any worries about being _________ or goaling" opposed by terminal "A worried goaler.

"Aside from this addition, the pattern is the same as the Gorilla Goals.

Mostly raw electric sprays are used in the Bear Goals to drive in the items.

The Bear Goals were handled by a group called, I think, "The Brothers of the Bear" and were the ancestors of the Hoipolloi.


From somewhere around 110,000 trillion trillion years ago or earlier to 390 trillion trillion years ago, the most difficult GPMs on the track were given.

These contain four RIs per set, positive-negative in dichotomy, (example: Wake, Never Wake, Sleep, Never Sleep), the four given five times for every one picture shown.

This makes 20 firings per picture.

But the first picture is invisible and the thetan afterwords is not expected to find then the first twenty firings of RIs (four in a row, repeated five times).

This makes a "vacuum" for a picture and groups the bank.

This type of implant is probably the source of vacuums in the reactive mind.

The remaining pictures vary during different periods of the sequence, but consist usually of a scene of a cave, a railway, an airplane, a view of a sun and planets.

The first "picture" making the total number of five is invisible and is no picture.

The pictures have a moving object in each (except the invisible one) which backs up halfway through the series.

The trick is to get the RIs out of the invisible picture, particularly the basic first four.

The RIs also fire right left, then left right so that the "Never" RI the next time has swapped sides

They go positive, negative, then, with swapped sides, positive negative.

They are simple aberrative words.

Start, Never Start, End, Never End are always the first firings, followed by Begin, Never Begin, Stop, Never Stop for the second whole series of firings.

The same four run through all five pictures.

Then the next four go through all five, etc.

There are many words used.

Early in the series 3-dimensional sets were used, late in the series only 2-dimensional pictures were employed.

_____________ There may be earlier GPM-type implants but the Goal idea does not go back earlier evidently than 390 trillion trillion years -- in the "Black Thetan" Implants.

Earlier material is only positive, negative and dichotomies according to present data.

But the earlier ones are more aberrative to the pc. _____________.


From about 390 trillion trillion years to 370 trillion trillion years ago, the Black Thetan goals were given.

These were given in a glade surrounded by the stone heads of "black thetans" who spat white energy at the trapped thetan.

The trapped thetan was motionless.

The pattern is the earliest "To" form of GPM now known.

There were six RIs per goal, consisting of: Accomplished Not Accomplished Action (ing) Never Action (ing) Goal Not Goal There were from 15 to 18 goals in the series, all of a simple nature such as To End, To be Dead, To be Asleep, etc.

The full series will be published at a later date hut is easily reconstructed, always following the same pattern of six.


This goal pattern (HCO Bulletin of 17 April 1963 as changed) was in use in an aircraft-type set between 315 trillion years ago and 216 trillion years ago and less, and is the pattern which precedes the Helatrobus Implants in this galaxy.

It remains to be seen if all preclears have it.

The goals were given with one or more goals in a series, usually one, and that goal was To Create.

The preclear possibly has this goal several times during this period.

It was given in the mocked-up fuselage of an aircraft with the thetan fixed before an aircraft door.

(There are also two or more aircraft fuselages used in the Helatrobus Implants, but the preclear moved through them, was not fixed in them). The date is the way to tell the pattern.

The Helatrobus Implants existed only between 52 trillion and 38 trillion years ago, the total life span of the Helatrobus government.

If the goal is found to lie earlier, between 315 trillion and 216 trillion or later, up to 52 trillion years ago, then it is probably this pattern.

The goal items were laid in with explosions.


This same pattern, but given in an amusement park with a single tunnel, a roller coaster and a Ferris wheel, was used between about 319 trillion years ago to about 256 trillion trillion years ago, a long span.

The symbol of a Gorilla was always present in the place the goal was given.

Sometimes a large gorilla, black, was seen elsewhere than the park.

A mechanical or a live gorilla was always seen in the park.

This activity was conducted by the Hoipolloi, a group of operators in meat body societies. They were typical carnival people.

They let out concessions for these implant "Amusement Parks.

" A pink-striped white shirt with sleeve garters was the uniform of the Hoipolloi.

Such a figure often rode on the roller coaster cars.

Monkeys were also used on the cars.

Elephants sometimes formed part of the equipment.

The Hoipolloi or Gorilla goals were laid in with fantastic motion.

Blasts of raw electricity and explosions were both used to lay the items in.

The series is always five goals.

These are very simple goals, no long words.

To End, To be Dead, To be Asleep, To be Solid, To Create, To Find, To be Visible, To be Sexual (not To have Sex as some pcs give it), To be Invisible, To Postulate and a very few more were used, always five goals in a series.

The series usually started with To be Dead, but To End, To Sleep and To be Asleep must also be investigated as the first goal of each series.

The pattern in HCOB 17 Apr.

AD 13 is correct for all of these goals, as changed in this HCO Bulletin.


The trick is to run a full series through on any of these as found, no matter how late it is in the period, then find the first time the series was given the pc and run the complete series.

Then get the next earlier type of series and do the same thing.

Your pc may not have been in the areas where these patterns were used and may have different types of implants.

If so, make sure first that the implant you have found does not contain one of these patterns before going to the hard labor of trying to make one up with the pc.


Between 38 trillion years ago and present time a lot of off-beat implants can be found.

They sometimes have only pictures, sometimes only items, sometimes items and pictures both.

They are usually short, often have no goal in them, only positive -- negative commands, and are not hard to work out.

The pc can usually get them easily if they're on his assessed R3R chain.


In a complex GPM pattern almost anything can be made to fire until the exact RI is found. Then no RR is left.

Wrong RIs leave white mass and eventually crumple up the engram.

Missed RIs leave black strips or patches.

Partially discharged RIs leave gray patches.

Restimulated but not run RIs turn everything black in the picture.

Scan a pc through RIs you don't suspect and it all goes black.

Get a wrong date or wrong duration and the pc has no visio or pictures that don't belong there.


This is a rapid resume of principal GPMs on the track.

Where the pattern applies it must be done exactly as given.

(Note: All trillions used are US trillions which are 1,000 million ).


This is a rough, fast survey of the Train GPMs and the Between Lives Implants and the pattern used.

The data involved in all this is of great scope and as it concerns all the peoples of Earth, considerable more work will be done on it.

As these are the most involved and low-toned implants on the time track, it is recommended that other earlier GPMs be completed before the Between Lives material is tackled.

After all tone arm action is the important thing and any earlier GPM that gives it makes the Between Lives Implants and Train GPMs easier to run.

So program for earlier GPMs.

However, pcs do get into the Between Lives Implants and do connect with the GPMs there and in the Train GPMs, so the pattern and data is released.

Where possible run earlier GPMs.

In any event, a safe rule is to run whatever GPM you can get your hands on and date as little as possible in 3N.


These are given to the being on his first contact with the Marcab Invasion Force in this sector of the universe.

Thus the Train GPMs date from hundreds of years ago to hundreds of thousands of years ago.

Earlier on the track there are lots of trains such as in the Invisible Picture GPMs.

So the mere existence of a train in the implant doesn't make it the Train Implants.

This is established by date.

The implanting is done from a huge train station.

The announcer, through speakers on the platform, gives continual running fire of wrong dates and directions, and orders to depart and return to this point, and "you don't know when this happened to you.

"A lot of hellos and goodbyes and false information.

The being is put in a railway carriage quite like a British railway coach with compartments.

Speakers are to the right and left in the compartment.

The train is backed up rapidly through eight pairs of stands (eight on either side of the track, sixteen in all ) These spray white energy against the side of the carriage.

None of the white energy touches the pc.

One pair of RIs fires during the whole backward run between the stands and then, reversing in the speakers, fires all the way forward again.

One pair of RIs in the pattern, then, fires a complete round trip.

Then the next pair fire for a complete round trip (forward and back) and so on.

There are then sixteen repeats for each pair, 8 forward and 8 back, before the next pair.

The pattern is as follows: (List for oppterm.

Remaining terms use the whole phrase of the goal "To Be ______.") Oppterm NOT (Oppterm) All (+ complete goal) Nothing (complete goal) Best (+ complete goal) Not Best (complete goal) Inevitable (+ complete goal) Questionable (complete goal) Doubted (+ complete goal) Certain (complete goal) Accursed (+ complete goal) Commendable (complete goal) Unforgivable (+ complete goal) Forgivable (complete goal) Hopeless (+ complete goal) Hopeful (complete goal) (Single RI) That's your goal.

At the start of each goal (or pair perhaps) a face may come up and say "You still here? Get out. Get off this train. We hate you.

" And from the speakers "This happened to you yesterday, tomorrow, now. This is your departure point, keep coming back. You'll be meeting all your friends here. When you're killed and dead keep coming back. You haven't a chance to get away. You've got to report in. This happened to you days ago, weeks ago, years ago. You don't know when this happened to you. We hate you. Get out. Don't ever come back.

" There's a lot more of this including how you'll be pulled and pulled when you're dead until you come back.

A lot of wrong dates are also thrown in. The type of goal is of the worst negative dichotomy. To Be Caught. To Be Wrong. To Go Away. To Commit Suicide. Etc.

The GPM "To End" begins the series.

There is a large number of GPMs in the series.

This series may have been given the pc on entrance to the Marcab Confederacy plus or minus 200,000 years ago, and then again much later just before the first Between Lives Implant as a preliminary step before the actual Between Lives Implant.

It is therefore important to run these Train GPMs before trying to run the Between Lives Implant itself, for all these GPMs are repeated again in the Between Lives Implant.

In running these Train GPMs, be sure to get the first pair on their first fire.

There is a standard swinging arm crossing signal that sounds at the end of each run of the train.

Trains play a large part in implanting. There are lots of pictures of them, lots of rails way earlier than the Train GPMs. But no earlier ones are given inside a coach. This is what makes it nightmarish -- the white energy only hits the coach sides, not the pc. The rush of the train puts heavy Kinesthetic into the engram. The goals "To Start" "To Stop" "To Change" make the pc feel he can't control the train.

To Be Unable. To Be Instantaneous. Various perceptions are all in this series of Train GPMs. If it's bad, it's there.


This implant properly has six parts.

1.Pc's actual death (not in first one given).

2. First screen section (to left) giving a false death, many GPMs calculated to obliterate memory and group the time track, and some pictures containing groupers.This says it is 15 days long.

3. The main screen purporting to give the future trillion, trillion, trillion, trillion, trillion years from the year zero. On this the pc's past implants get stuck up.

4. The "Next Hundred Days." A screen on the right of the main screen giving a number of positive dichotomy GPMs to fit the negative dichotomy goals on the first screen section (2).This also contains a false projection to Earth "into a baby" complete with sonic on the delivery room (a home bedroom with oatmeal wall paper or the current fashion on Earth.)

5. The actual kickoff from the implant station (not by projection to Earth but being dumped on Earth.)

6.The actual search for a baby.

The main screen is a long white board with a grate near the top all the way along.

There is a roar in the whole place like blowers going.

Huge numbers of earlier GPMs stack up on (2). Lots of earlier implants stack up on the main screen. The whole operation is a huge grouper. But given good TA action, it all eventually flies apart, especially if many earlier GPMs and the Train GPMs are run first with good TA action.

The pc has had at least two series of Train Implants and perhaps as many as 300 Between Lives Implants in the last many thousands of years.

Therefore the way to program all this is to run mainly earlier GPMs on the pc, then the Train GPMs, then any more earlier GPMs that can be found and then the Between Lives Implants.

The Between Lives Implants (and the Train GPMs) have the full intention of installing a compulsion to return and a feeling the pc can be reached by them and be pulled about, and wiping out all memory of former life.

But any pc can be run on earlier GPMs in spite of all this.

The reason this and other "screen implants" acts as a grouper is because it restimulates earlier track charge which then, pushing forward toward PT, crushes the incidents and GPMs on the screen.

Of course it is all "wrong dated" and "wrong durationed".

" And this contributes to the crush of the material toward PT.

But basically it is simply restimulated charge on the early track that presses toward PT and shoves the pc into the screen implant.

Therefore if you just restimulate and do not run early track GPMs when found, eventually you will find your pc crushed up against recent times and in these Between Lives screens (if life and these screen incidents have not already done it).

This is the secret of the amnesia: Restimulate enough early track charge and do not discharge it and the being will have amnesia on the whole track.

If you are monkeying about on the backtrack and just partially discharging incidents, going on to something new all the time, failing to run a series of GPMs completely when you find them, after a while, past track will become unreal to the pc.

Then it will blot out and vanish and you will only have these Between Lives type of implants to work with.

Then if you flub them, your pc's pictures will disappear.


This all occurs on the mechanism of early track restimulation, compounded with wrong dates and wrong durations. So the way to handle any pc is to locate or spring off the bank early GPMs or implants and run them fully.Lack of Tone Arm action may upset this program but it is mainly GPMs that stick tone arms since they stall time. A pc is in danger if earlier track is becoming less real or is vanishing or the bank is pressing forward and landing on screens.

The remedy is take what was already restimulated earlier, particularly GPMs, any GPMs, and run them thoroughly (1) As GPMs (2) As engrams and (3) As pc's postulates.

This discharges them. Keep this up, be thorough.Don't restimulate more than you discharge fully. And the pc's pictures will come back on and the track go straight again. The above gives you the right way to handle the Between Lives Implants.

Peel off the GPMs from it (meaning early track GPMs restimulated on it and visible on the screen) and run them fully before taking something else off the screen to run. Thus one does not really run a Between Lives Implant until very late on a case.

The auditor uses it when it appears on a case (1) to realize that the earlier track has been restimulated too much and too little discharged from it and (2) to find earlier GPMs to run.

Excessive restimulation and flopping about on the early track and running nothing clean will inevitably bring the pc forward and up against the Between Lives Implants.

So the auditor who restimulates and does not run early track material when found is doing a dangerous thing.

The Between Lives Implants create amnesia only because they restimulate early track and don't discharge it.If they didn't do this they would not produce the same effect. Therefore auditing undoes this mechanism only when early track incidents are thoroughly run when contacted. The worst sinner is the GPM.So never fail to run any early track GPM completely when found, with its whole series.

Don't go skipping about. Going earlier. Omitting goals, leaving a GPM incompletely discharged. Otherwise you will make the acquaintance with the Between Lives Implant area. If you know of any early GPM series left unhandled on the pc, run it completely before restimulating anything else. And if you are running the Between Lives Implant grab off of it any earlier GPM or incident you can find and take it early and run it. Don't stay with the screen. Peel things off it that are earlier and run them. Otherwise the pc's bank will feel like crumbling forward into PT like an avalanche.

This mechanism of the production of unawareness by restimulating but not running charge on the early track is itself an important discovery. It forbids then browsing through the early track, a sip here, a datum there. Be thorough or crash, out goes the lights, into PT slides the pc with a thousand volts driving him on.

If you know of any early track GPM on your pc that can be run with tone arm motion clean it up as a GPM, clean up all the GPMs in that series, run it as an engram, run any and all postulates out of it, get it clean and then find something else.

The cycle of a pc in total amnesia at start of auditing would be (if audited with good TA action): 1.

Contacts yesterday 2. Contacts this life 3. Contacts childhood 4. Contacts a past life 5. Contacts incidents on this planet in the past few thousand years 6. Contacts early track 7. Contacts lots of early track and GPMs 8. Contacts earlier GPMs 9. Contacts very early material 10. Continues to clean up track 11. Contacts reasons for making pictures 12. Goes OT.

If you try to rush this by practicing unthoroughness from (5) on, then when pc reaches (9) above you will suddenly find him on the Between Life screens.

You will have overcharged early track and failed to discharge it and the result will be: 8.

Contacts earlier GPMs but has trouble holding position on the track to run them and is ARC breaky; 9a.

Contacts earlier material but it groups and scrunches and sticks together; 10a.

Collides with screen implants like the Between Lives (there are earlier ones); 11a.

Can't keep pictures apart, things easily wrong dated and is very ARC breaky and is stuck in Between Lives; 12a.

Can't reach the early track and at session starts, is found to be stuck in this lifetime.

There is no shortcut back to finding when he started to "make pictures.

" The phenomenon of early charge pushing the pc back toward PT if not run defeats any such attempt.

So making an OT is keeping the TA going with itsa line in and being thorough on early track incident running.

If the pc has gotten into condition (12a) above or is approaching it, don't waste time on endless dating.

Just find any early GPM already partially run (the earliest one you can lay your hands on without restimulating others) and run it completely.

Then find another and another.

And shun all new material until you have completely handled the old.

And don't let the pc wander around on the early track.

Just find and run GPMs and clean up fully whatever you find.

Or you'll be sitting there reading this HCOB despairingly trying to get your pc off a Between Lives screen.

Even if these listed evils occur, however, you have not lost the TA action already gained, if misguidedly, on the case and the matter is easily repaired providing you redo what you've left undone and this time be neat and restimulate the case otherwise as little as possible.

He or she is still closer to OT.

They were just making it the hard way.

(TFL, DID read, unconvinced.)


See also

Xenu homeboy.pngHISTORY of the UNIVERSE is part of a series on ScientologyXenu homeboy.png



DianeticsDisconnectionChild abuseSaint HillScientology's History of the UniverseSec CheckFreewindsSea OrgGlossaryReligious Freedom WatchVolunteer MinistersOSASpace Opera


L. Ron HubbardDavid MiscarriageTom CruiseScientology AgentsTommy DavisRogues GallerySuri CruiseTerryeoHeaven's GateThe RegimeEvil Jacket GuyJoe FeshbachVaLLarrrTom NewtonJohn CarmichaelFreezoneCaptain Bill RobertsonDanny MastersonWill SmithOschaperKendrick MoxonTim ArmerJorge SerranoRon SaveloJohn TravoltaJett Travolta


AnonymousWise Beard ManJason BegheGas Mask GirlMagooNew Zealand Fail GuyMessage from ScientologyShawn LonsdaleRorschachMoralfagsLeaderfagsRaidfag WenchJames PackerEpic Nose GuyStu WyattTommy GormanThe Unknown AutobotPsychiatristsMarcab ConfederacyDavid Wu-KapauwEpic Sword GuyAgent Pubeit


PROJECT CHANOLOGYWhy We Protest ForumsA Scientologist's Guide to 4chanThe GeteratorPaul "Fetch" CarnesReligionIsFree.orgYou Found the Card/i/alt.religion.scientologyComplete binge of LEAKED SCILON DOX888chan