Genital Herpes

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Genital Herpes (technically herpes simplex, but more commonly known simply as "herpes") is a virus that effects humans and one of God's gift to teh lulz. It won't kill you, but once it infects you, it's like a tattoo: permanent, and worth having.

Although a permanent STD, according to advertisements for herpes medication Valtrex, herpes will cause you to live a more glamorous life: riding horseback through the ocean shores of California, white-water rafting in the Colorado River, riding a motorcycle through the chilly evening desert plains, and climbing the rugged terrain of the Appalachian Mountains.

In fact, you get genital herpes because you are a whore. Feel free to treat those with genital herpes like the smegma-sucking, santorum-licking, low-life shits that they are.

1-in-4 Americans over age 12 have "teh herp". While not shocking at first, the number can be viewed as a staggering statistic if applied in the following manner: Imagine, if you will, going to see your local baseball team and the stadium is at near capacity. 10,000 of your fellow beer swilling, hot dog eating brethren are herpetic. Feel better now?

Contents

What to do if you have herpes

The proper treatment for genital herpes is with bacteriostatics (herpes simplex virus) and antivirals, such as acyclovir. Acyclovir should be taken orally in 200 mg doses five times per day (for a total of 1 g daily) for 10 days. Oh, what's that? Your stupid health care system doesn't provide you with prescription coverage? No problem: you can always practice the tried-and-true method of just not telling people that you have herpes because, hey, you're not contagious if you don't have active sores, right?

Celebs with "Da Herp"

It's not a herpes lesion

"Beauty Marks"

It's...

Gallery

See Also


Genital Herpes is part of a series on Dying Alone

Poemo.jpg Those Who Have Died Alone

Aaron SwartzAmy WinehouseAnna Nicole SmithAmanda ToddBrandon CrispCharmaine DragunCodey PorterDavid CarradineEdaremElliot RodgerElvis PresleyHeath LedgerLemonade CoyoteLoki BlackfangMegan MeierMichael JacksonMitchell HendersonMySpaceOtoya YamaguchiRicardo LopezRipperLiloRudolph ZurickShawn WoolleyShayTyler Dumstorf

Those Dying Alone

Alex FordAmerica's Third PartyAnonymous BorgAnthony 'A-Log' LoGattoArgent009Arguecat3Bambifan101Basement DwellersBenny_the_SnakeBikerfoxBill9929Bob RehahnBroniesByAppointmentToChris-chanChuck M.CrazyvideosandrantsDaniel BrandtDavid HockeyDBoyWheelerDeekerDGTrixieDiaper BoyDnepropetrovsk maniacsDon RobertsDragoneerDrakonEpic Fat GuyErik RibsskogFagolescentsFat ManFaust & PoryFluffy teh wolfFriends of A-LogFurriesGirlvinylGoddessMilleniaGhostG-ZayHellkiller777IchverbotJohn BullaJohn FieldJohn Patrick RogersJonmonJoseph CampJoseph8276Kathleen ToddKevin HavensKimmo Johan AlmKrashedLecarickMariotehplumberMarjan SiklicMonica PunkMuZemikeMylarBalloonFanNaokoElric2250Nathan GaleNick BravoNullcherriOnideus Mad HatterOnyx ForepawPit ViperRicki RavenRobert Wayne StilesRootbrianRose3212Sad FrogSam PepperSethistoSceptreSchnookumsSonmanicSnapesnoggerSuperlisamcbTheSockDetectiveTyciolUlillilliaThe Unknown AutobotWeegeeisgoingtokillmYou

Their Methods

9gagAIDSAnimuAsperger's SyndromeBoozeask.fmBody PillowsBullyingCosplayDead FriendDeviantARTDrugsFanFictionFeminismFleshlightFurry ArtHover hand‎HufflepuffSelf-seclusionHackingIRCJenkemLegoLiveJournalLonelyLoveShyMai WaifuMinecraftMMORPGsMUDsMy Little PonyMy Tiny DickNeckbeardNice GuyismOculus RiftOh ShiternetOnline datingOnline sex gamesPlastic CrapPlenty of FishRuneScapeSilk Screen Goku ShirtTaking the Internet Too SeriouslyShy Boys IRLSocial JusticeTulpasTV TropesUncyclopediaVloggerheadsWizardchanWorld of WarcraftYouTube


Genital Herpes is part of a series on Biology
Body.jpg Bodies: AssholeBodybuildingBoobsCameltoeCockCumFatGuntManginaMoobsNeckbeardPissPussyShitSkeleton
Illnesses and Disorders: AIDSCancer (and The Cancer That Is Killing /b/) • DiabeetusDwarfismErectile dysfunctionFetal Alcohol SyndromeFibromyalgiaGenital HerpesGRIDS (see also The GRIDS that is killing ED) • ObesityParkinson's DiseaseSexually Transmitted DiseasesSwine Flu
Injuries: 1guy1jarBMECircumcisionCastrationEmo Cutter GirlEunuch ArchiveGuroHeadshotLJ cutPain SeriesPsyke.orgSelf-injuryTattoosTrepanation
Famous Body Bits: Finger BoxHand of ClodHand of Dios
See Also:

PsychologySexShock Site

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Genital Herpes is part of a series on

Sex

Visit the Sex Portal for complete coverage.

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