I Am Legend

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I am legend, properly executed.

I Am Legend is a meme. Shockingly, despite its strong roots of being copied from a line of dialogue on an advertisement for the movie based on the book, it failed to take off.

The Film

Aaron Neville is the last black scientist left on earth, and luckily is immune to the incurable virus that has plagued the entire planet. For three years, Neville has constantly sent out daily radio messages in between 24/7 spins of Bel-Air, to try and find any other survivors who might be out there. No one wants to listen to him, however, because he is a black person and this is talk radio.

Though I Am Legend is an easy to watch action/horror movie that bears no relation to the award winning story it is based on, there are also some very serious scenes in the movie, such as the gem below:


The Meme

The meme was simple to pull off, and very unimpressive. It consisted of the following:

One can either post pictures of someone with a phone or message with the caption "My name is Dr. Robert Neville. I am broadcasting on all AM frequencies.", or, a la Battletoads, call a department store telling them you are Dr. Robert Neville, and are broadcasting on all AM frequencies. The second method is best received when done with static in the background, staying true to the movie trailer.


Howevar, /b/ was not amused and did not respond. Unlike the EPIC WIN that was "300." Anon came away lolling at the crappy movie instead of embracing it, proving - once again - that Will Smith sucks donkey balls and is only of relevance to Anon cos of Bel-Air.

What replaced the above (supposed) 'meme', were a few 15-minutes-of-fame mocking macros making light of the film's moar hilarious maguffins such as bacon, Fred, a crowbar and bacon.

How The Fresh Prince will Fix This

Unfortunately Will Smith is a scientologist, so he will probably believe he has super powers after filming this.

FREEEEDDDD!!!!!

DAMMIT FRED!!!!!!!!
OHMYGODS FRED IS REAL!


The Full Text

   
 
My name is Dr. Robert Neville.

I am a survivor living in New York city.

Nothing went the way it was supposed to.

There were 6 billion people on earth when the infection hit.

I am broadcasting on all AM frequencies.

If there is anyone out there..

Please.

You are not alone.
 


 
 

— Robert Neville, bricks shat.

Fresh Prince of Legends

Dammit, Frank!

Now this is a story all about how my
Life got flipped turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute just sit right there
I'll tell you how I become the last man on Earth.

In New York City born and raised
In the labroom is where I spent most of my days
Chillin' out, maxin', relaxin', all cool
And all curin' some cancer outside of the school
When a couple of vampires they were up to no good
Started makin' trouble in my neighborhood
I made one little mistake and everyone's dead
I thought, "I'm movin' with my dog to my fortress shed"

I was cornered by vampires that ate my dog
But I was saved by a Brazilian that had immunity
If anything I could say that this bitch was rare
But I thought, "Nah, forget it. Yo home to my lair!"

I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8
And I yelled to the vampires yo holmes smell ya later
Looked at my kingdom I was finally there
To sit on my throne as the last man on Earth.

Dogs and Bacon version

Now, this is a story all about how
My life got flipped-turned upside down
And I liked to take a minute
Just sit right there
I'll tell you how I was savin the bacon

In west new york born and raised
On the pier was where I spent most of my days
Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool
And all shootin some infected inside ground zero
When a couple of monsters
Who were up to no good
Startin makin trouble in my neighborhood
my dog got in one lil fight and i got scared
and said 'shit im savin that bacon'

I whistled for my dog and when it came near
The flesh was ripped and the fresh smell of blood was in the air
If anything I can say this made my sanity get taken
But I thought 'ah shit now you done it' - 'i was savin that bacon'

I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8
And I yelled to the Heavens 'Let me tell you about god's plan'
I looked at my shithole, I was finally there
To sit on all alone with the bacon frying in a pan


WHY I SHOULD HAVE STAYED IN BEL-AIR

Now this is a story all about how
My life got flipped turned upside down
And I'd like to take a minute just sit right there
I'll tell you why I should have stayed in a town called Bel-Air

In New York City born and raised
Talkin' to mannequins is how I spent most of my days
Chillin' out, maxin', relaxin', all cool
Rentin' movies and hittin' on mannequins too
When a couple of mutants they were up to no good
Started makin' trouble in my neighborhood
I made one little mistake now I'm stuck in a snare
I thought, ' FUCK HOW DID FRANK GET OUT THERE.'

I whistled for my stupid dog Sam and when she came near
I told that bitch to stop barking if she wanted some bacon
If anything I would say that this dog was rare
But I thought, 'Man forget it, let's get back to the lair!'

I crawled up to my house about 7 or 8
And I yelled to that Mexican Brazilian bitch ' Yo holmes I was savin' that bacon! '
Looked outside, the mutants were finally there.
To fuck up my throne, I should have stayed in Bel-Air!

TL;DR

Trolling

A good way to troll faggots is to call the mannequin Neville was gay for "Frank" instead of "Fred". For some reason people get really butthurt over this.

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