James Packer

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James Packer
2002 was a tuff year for James
James is very strong.

James "Fudge" Packer is the second third-richest man in Australia, and a former Scientologist. He was born in 1967. He is a Virgo. He is said to be worth around AUS$7 billion (USA $10 $100billion). James owns several TV networks in Australia, giving him almost total control of what Australians are allowed to watch.

Sex lives of the rich and famous

James is married to "model" and failed singer Erica Baxter. He started out stalking girls like Tania Bryer and Joan Severance, then was with Kate Fischer until she dumped his ass after two years. Packer then married swimsuit model Jodhi Meares. She dumped his ass in June 2002. Packer then snagged Erica. He also has a long standing same-sex relationship with Tom Cruise. He's also shagged Miranda Kerr.

Blunders

2002 was a shitty year for James. Starting his new rebound with Erica was kind of fun, but he was totally flailing in the business world. One of his biggest companies, "One .Tel," went belly-up, due to some silly mistakes James and his boyfriend, Lachlan Murdoch, had made. This cost the company's investors hundreds of millions of dollars.

Vulnerable but friendly

James was sad, confused and fat. He had no "havingness" and was not in "beingness." On a trip to Los Angeles he met top Scilon Tom Cruise at a celebrity soiree. The two hit it off immediately. They were inseparable for the next few days they spent together, just talking about the meaning of life and stuff. For his part, Tom was excited because it looked like he could "groom" James to be the new billion-dollar donor, allowing the cult to buy large new properties in cities all over the world. As a gift, Tom gave James the outstanding 15-DVD series of Mr. David Miscavige's Golden Age of Knowledge lectures.

When James got back to Australia, he couldn't stop thinking about what a good time he'd had with Tom. Everything Tom said seemed to make so much sense. James decided to go to the local "Org" for some "auditing."

Blurry

The next few years passed in a blur of checque-writing and weird, intrusive interrogations. James was invited to every Scientology party. He learned all the best anecdotes about LRH, and was really making moves in Australian political circles to b& psychiatry in that country. One thing, however, always troubled him: Scientology's hatred of his life's #1 passion: Gambling.

James loves to gamble. He owns casinos in 60 countries including Macau and Wales. He has a pair of dice and a deck of cards on him 24/7. Yet to be a good Scilon, he would have to give all this up, and replace the casinos with Narconon facilities.

Change spared

In early 2008, James was chilling at home, looking at Encyclopedia Dramatica. He noticed the articles aboutProject Chanology. He tried to look away, as he had been instructed to do, but he just couldn't. The more he read, the more he began to understand the true nature of Scientology.

On May 9, 2008, James let it be known that he was no longer a Scilon. Then he got in his jet and flew to Vegas for some good old-fashioned hookers & blow & craps.

Scientology response

When asked for his thoughts about Packer snapping out of it, David Miscavige only had this to say.

Xenu homeboy.pngJames Packer is part of a series on ScientologyXenu homeboy.png

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LOL TECH:

DianeticsDisconnectionChild abuseSaint HillScientology's History of the UniverseSec CheckFreewindsSea OrgGlossaryReligious Freedom WatchVolunteer MinistersOSASpace Opera

SCILONS:

L. Ron HubbardDavid MiscarriageTom CruiseScientology AgentsTommy DavisRogues GallerySuri CruiseTerryeoHeaven's GateThe RegimeEvil Jacket GuyJoe FeshbachVaLLarrrTom NewtonJohn CarmichaelFreezoneCaptain Bill RobertsonDanny MastersonWill SmithOschaperKendrick MoxonTim ArmerJorge SerranoRon SaveloJohn TravoltaJett Travolta

NOTORIOUS SPs:

AnonymousWise Beard ManJason BegheGas Mask GirlMagooNew Zealand Fail GuyMessage from ScientologyShawn LonsdaleRorschachMoralfagsLeaderfagsRaidfag WenchJames PackerEpic Nose GuyStu WyattTommy GormanThe Unknown AutobotPsychiatristsMarcab ConfederacyDavid Wu-KapauwEpic Sword GuyAgent Pubeit

ENTURBULULZ:

PROJECT CHANOLOGYWhy We Protest ForumsA Scientologist's Guide to 4chanThe GeteratorPaul "Fetch" CarnesReligionIsFree.orgYou Found the Card/i/alt.religion.scientologyComplete binge of LEAKED SCILON DOX888chan

James Packer
is part of a series on
Ausfailia
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Just another British fucking colony...

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