John Travolta

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John Travolta in his role as a fat man with Manboobs

John Travolta (born Josef Goldstein) is a Hollywood actor best known for playing the dad in the critically-acclaimed Look Who's Talking series.

Contents

Early Life

John Travolta and his twin brother, actor/comedian Carrot Top, were born at least 100 years ago in New Jersey. Their father was an Irish immigrant who worked in a coal mine and their mother was a concert pianist. By his early teens, Travolta had already shown a certain knack for acting and auditioned for roles all the time, most of which he easily won. In 1976, at the age of at least 100 years old he was trapped inside a bubble to stop his gayness fucking up society and forced to bubble fuck some dowdy bitch and shit. This was later blamed for his succeptibility to scientology headfucking techniques. He has his own themetune, it's all like naaah, nananana nah nah.


He is also known for his famous catch phrase

Midlife Crisis (aka joining Scientology)

Travolta became a Scientologist after seeing one of their really persuasive television commercials. He had been looking for direction ever since his movies Grease and Saturday Night Fever completely flopped and he found it in the form of paying people to rid his body of ancient, evil aliens. It is estimated that Travolta has purchased $1 billion worth of Scientological horse shit.

Shortly after joining, Travolta auditioned for the role of Goatse man but lost out to Rob Schneider. That's why to this day he only performs in movies based on the writings of L. Ron Hubbard, like Battlefield Earth, The Passion of the Christ, and Throw Mamma from the Train.

Because John is a sci-fag and doesn't believe in mental illnesses, he decided not to treat his autistic son as it's against the TOS of scientology. His son Jett (like a plane geddit?) had seizures and was diagnosed by teachers, psychologists & just about everyone the kid ever met. Joey Travolta did a documentary about autistic kids and interviewed 65 of them, which was still not enough to get Travolta to get his kid the help he needed.

Jett slipped on a bathmat and joined the great Xenu in the after life, well at least he will as long as Travolta doesn't admit to the other sci-fags that his kid was a retard.

If it is revealed that Jett intentionaly commited suicide and framed it as a bathmat fall because he couldn't bear to live with his dad's faggotry, he will be considered an hero to us all. If it was a setup it is quite possible he did this simply for the lulz.

Scientology No More?

Yet because Scientology is so full of AIDS and bullshit, Travolta has apparently had it with their teachings and way of life. Since they've blamed him for Jett's death, Travolta has become embittered (yet terrified) of Scientology's subsequent retaliation. Those rascally Scientologists sure do like to hold onto their high-profile members..

Read the article here.

Help John Travolta Leave Scientology!

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Selected Filmography

Gallery

Xenu homeboy.pngJohn Travolta is part of a series on ScientologyXenu homeboy.png

LOL TECH: Scientology - Dianetics - Disconnection - Child Abuse - Saint Hill - Scientology's History of the Universe - Sec Check - Freewinds - Sea Org - Glossary - Religious Freedom Watch - Volunteer Ministers - OSA - Space Opera
SCILONS: L. Ron Hubbard - David Miscarriage - Tom Cruise - Scientology Agents - Footbullet Man - Rogues Gallery - Suri Cruise - Terryeo - Heaven's Gate - The Regime - Evil Jacket Guy - Joe Feshbach - VaLLarrr - Jonathan Barbera - Jake Vigil - John Carmichael - Freezone - Captain Bill Robertson - Danny Masterson - Will Smith - Tommy Davis - Oschaper - Kendrick Moxon - Tim Armer - Jorge Serrano - Ron Savelo - John Travolta - Jett Travolta
NOTORIOUS SPs: Anonymous - Wise Beard Man - Jason Beghe - Gas Mask Girl - Magoo - New Zealand Fail Guy - Message from Scientology - Shawn Lonsdale - Rorschach - Moralfags - Leaderfags - Raidfag Wench - James Packer - Epic Nose Guy - Stu Wyatt - Tommy Gorman - The Unknown Autobot - Psychiatrists - Marcab Confederacy - Marvin Gaye - Epic Sword Guy - Agent Pubeit
ENTURBULULZ: PROJECT CHANOLOGY (portal page) - Enturbulation - A Scientologist's Guide to 4chan - The Geterator - Mrfetch - ReligionIsFree.org - You Found the Card - /i/ - alt.religion.scientology - Complete binge of LEAKED SCILON DOX - 888chan
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