Legend of the Cryptids

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Not to be confused with Legend of Zelda

Legend of the Cryptids (AKA Legend of ripping you off), is an MMORPG card game for iPhones and Androids where every card is an animu card with big tits that just rips your basement dwelling ass off of your jewgolds with network servers fucking up every time.


Cards

For only $60.00 that ultra rare card can be yours!

Common, rare and ultra rare are the three categories of playing cards, they have 1, 3 or 5 stars respectively. Another star is added when a card is evolved, accomplished when two similar cards are combined. Evolving seems like a strange name for the process, but that's what the developers call it. To ensure players grind needlessly, coins are required to evolved a card, and afterwards its level resets and the max level is increased.

Legend of the cryptids common.png
Common

Common cards are completely worthless, they are acquired by questing, event participation and drawing from the Friendship Card Pack. Players may draw from this pack once a day for free or by spending Friendship Points. So you basically get to draw once a day, because if you play this game it is pretty obvious you don't have any friends.

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Rare

Rare cards are what most players will possess unless they are newbs or clueless. While these can be drawn from the Friendship Card Pack, the chances of this happening are slim. Instead, when players reach certain levels, they can draw from the Legends Card Pack which guarantees a rare card. Think of this pack as virtual food stamps. Most the time players will add rare cards to their collection by wasting their life by ranking in events.

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Ultra Rare

The ultra rare, as their name implies, are not easy to get a hold of, but also have the best stats. Drawing one from the Legendary Card Pack is just not going to happen, and of course the other retards with this game won't sell trade these for your shitty beginner cards. For the most part, events and special promotions are the best way to get an ultra rare card, or if you're really that desperate, there is always eBay.

How to play

Like any other mobile game, Legend of the Cryptids is a fantasy RPG card game. It's like any other IRL Pokemon or YuGiOh card games that you play back when your mom was a porn star. The basics of the game are to tap on button icons.

Questing

Questing is where the storyline is. You play as some douche with no life who was then enslaved to fight a giant nigger cloud known as the Shadow King and his army.

Battle

This is where players battle other players just for lulz to stir up a shitstorm or to steal each other's collection items. Before they patched up the game, people use to pick on the same oppponent for collection items or to stir up a storm. The collection items are the shit you get for completing the quest. there are 6 items in 1 set. You only get 2 of the 6 as you progress through the story. Steal from 4 other people via battle to complete the collection only to get a very weak rare card.


Clothing

Appibot did all it could to attract perverts from across the internet without invoking the wrath of Apple's censors. Like everything else that originates from Japan, only the trained eye can differentiate if the jailbait is male or female. While males look are feminine as possible, it's what females are wearing, or lack of, that's a dead giveaway. If a character is wearing just enough lingerie or latex to coverup certain areas while keeping fans interested, then it's female, probably.

Whoring out their product

In an attempt to gain moar jewgold, Applibot made many ads and spread them around like AIDs in hopes of getting the attention of perverts and fatasses all around the world.

Referrals

Legend of the Cryptids has a referral bonus results in free advertising as players spam referral codes across the internet in hopes of a rare card and 10,000 coins. While invite codes are spammed everywhere, forums seem to get hit the hardest, to the point that idiots to post referral codes get banned on sight. What's sad is the rare card isn't very powerful and 10,000 coins isn't a game changer either.


Language filter

Like any other place on the internet, conflict between players is inevitable as they go after each other's throats other silly drama in-game and on the forums. Word of this faggotry eventually reaches the administrators when someone gets butthurt and snitches, resulting in someone getting raped with the almighty ban hammer because of "inappropriate behavior." In an effort to make their game a friendly place for all, the developers implemented a state of the art language filter, preventing people from saying "grape" while allowing "ass" and "damn." Everyone knows that grape references grape soda, which is considered racist when said by a white person. Other words were also deemed inappropriate, causing those who put a lot of money into a free-to-play game. Appibot in turn shows their concern by ignoring their complaints, choosing to tend to more important matters such as extracting more cash from their user base.

Servers

The server on on Legend of the Cryptids is even shittier than ED's IRC servers.
This screen will pop up every 2 minutes after you start up the game, proving how well the admins have set up their server fo this broken game.

The servers on LoC runs on baked potatoes and often crashes every 10 seconds which makes all the players in the game butthurt all over the place and then whine like bitches on their community board.

The Mods

The admins of this broken game are Japs since the server is hosted somewhere in Tokyo. These Jew Gold hungry loners sit on their fat ass and fap away with there 1 inch penises at their drawings. Obviously no girlfriend what so ever. They can just fap, draw another card, and then fap to it for the rest of the day all through their life. When it comes to compensations to their broken game to users, they will act like Jews and not give anyone the kewl items.

Events

Events in the game are broken and are the main factors that the game crashes frequently causing players to rage quit forever. There are 4 events in the game, which makes 4 times the butthurt. Events are as followed:Raid, Colosseo (they probably don't know how to spell Colosseum), Odyssey, and Battle Royale.

Raid

Probably the most competitive event. Most rage occurs here as the game's servers will fry up in 5 seconds. Players fight through a shitty written story of some twisted folk story. Randomly a boss would surprise buttsex you through the event. But you wont be able to fight it because of how shit the admins run their servers. Final rewards are shit, and you realized that you have wasted thousands of dollars and 10 days of your life trying hard to rank number 1 and sucking when you could have used that money to stop being a fat basement dwelling furry and get lipo, and an actual girlfriend.

Odyssey

Worst event ever created. Ctrl C, Ctrl V of Raid, except bosses appear every 5 levels.

Battle Royale

A big war between guilds using your $1000 hentai cards that you tried winning at the card pack.

Colosseo

An absolute fail version of a Pokemon/Yu-Gi-Oh card game or some shit like that. Pretty much it's Battle Royale, only difference is that you fight other players with your hentai cards.

Cryptic Assault

Fight a monster with your guild to get points and win a pointless card with boobs on it.

Gallery

See also

External links

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Gaming

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Legend of the Cryptids is part of a series on MMORPGs. [Gratz!Ding!]
Forerunners:

AngbandDiabloDungeons & DragonsFATALRagnarokRogueWarhammer 40,000

MMORPGs:

Age of ConanAnarchy OnlineCity of HeroesConquer OnlineDark Age of CamelotDarkfallEarth EternalEVE OnlineEverQuestEverQuest IIFinal Fantasy XIFinal Fantasy XIVFree RealmsHero OnlineLifeMapleStoryMinecraftPangyaRagnarok OnlineRuneScapeRuby Dragon EntertainmentSilkroad OnlineStar Wars: The Old RepublicTabula RasaToontownUltima OnlineWikipediaWorld of WarcraftWWII Online

Semi-MMORPGs:

Diablo IIDiablo IIIEndless OnlineFurcadiaGaia OnlineGraalGuild WarsKingdom of LoathingProgress QuestSecond LifeTibiaWar Thunder

Developers:

Blizzard EntertainmentJagexSony Online Entertainment

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