Life partner

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A gay partner. Due to the fact that to be politically correct, gays have to be allowed to do anything normal people can do. This includes marriage, and so many countries are now legalizing gay marriages. Due to the fact that gays, like any minority, think that they are better than everyone else and therefore have to have a special term for them. Yes, that certainly will reduce discrimination. The term is used by fags and dykes when referring to their intimate relationships to distract the listener from the fact that the consummation of said relationship consists of hopelessly rubbing cooters or bloody buttsecks. Unfortunately, to most people (aside from gays and lesbians), the term "life partner" brings to mind images of the life partners engaging in hopelessly rubbing cooters or engaging in bloody buttsecks.

A homosexual life partnership usually lasts anywhere from a week to five minutes, depending on how into foreplay they are and how far away the nearest leather or lezzie bar is. Once a gay man hits prostate cancer age, if they aren't already closed due to AIDS, they'll find some twink to pound messily until their body falls apart from years of snorting cocaine and chugging Tab soda. This pegboy often contracts terminal GRIDS early on in their life from this sort of partnership (See: DLB), and often break down upon discovering that their papa bear spent the inheritance on gigolos and blow. When old lesbians marry, they generally brick off the front door of their apartment and watch the Ellen series on repeat until the smell begs the neighbors to remove their fetid corpses.

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