Lucky Star

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Lucky ☆ Star is an overrated animu that most of /a/ has been creaming their pants over since its debut in April 2007. Catering to pedophiles, the show follows the completely ordinary lives of 17-year-old high school girls, drawn to resemble 8-year-olds, which makes fapping to the public bath scene totally okay. While the show may have its moments, like Tsukasa being gang raped by some deer, or when Konata's dad has one of his "Kimura" moments, the funny moments are few and far between. Most of the show is just long sequences of dialog that last for what seem like hours, wrapped up with one witty retort when each scene closes.

Plot

Lucky ☆ Star consists of four main characters who are all girls being unfunny retards making constant references to other animes and being total fags. For every episode, simply imagine 30 minutes of lolis talking, and talking, and talking and OMG IT'S SO STINKY!, and looking "cute". The only real reason anyone watches this shit is to have something to base their yuri fantasies on. Or rape.

Lucky Star's "humor" comes from observations from daily life, usually something you can relate to. Like how to eat a pastry with chocolate inside it. However, unlike proper observational comedy Lucky Star contains no punchlines, so watching the anime is the equivalent to watching an arse-pie narrating every zany thing they witness without any wit nor cleverness involved. So all in all, it's pretty much just an enormous cocktease for sad otakus and provides no real plot and a script that a down-syndrome child could create.

Lolis

Kagami, secret fan of Yaoi.
Tsukasa discovers lemonparty on her cell phone for the first time.
Miyuki, the trap oldfag.
Yutaka being unfunny.
Minami almost exposing her flat chest to the world.
Misao uttering her catchphrase, translated: "I suck cock!". Careful of the fang.
Ayano.

Konata Izumi

The leader of the four main female leads and easily the most popular because her blue hair, addiction to anime, retarded facial expression and procrastinating lifestyle often makes weebs think they have a sense of self-worth in their forever alone lives, then worship her and paint her figurines with semen because she's so "kawaii". She's the perfect example of an Otaku who fucks away most of her time playing H-games, fapping to Yuri doujins, reading manga, poking fun at superior animes, playing MMORPGs with her teacher and getting nagged by Kagami to study or she'll end up working at McDonald's. A running gag throughout the show sees her getting harrassed by Meito Anisawa and his accomplices for useless anime merchandise she doesn't want when she visits their shop. Unlike you, she gets a job at a Cosplay café with fellow weeaboo Patricia Martin so she can fund her habit.

Like nearly all the other characters she has no tits. She exists primarily as a walking Advertisement for Kyoto Animation's cash cow, The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya, thus the constant insertion of Haruhi references as humanly possible and more.

Kagami Hiiragi

The older twin of Tsukasa and behaves as if she is constantly on PMS. She studies hard and is the most responsible in their family but is an uppity anal-retentive dyke who always gets into trouble with Konata, and compared to her sister can't cook for shit. As a running gag Konata frequently rubs her up the wrong way and arguements ensue. She bitches constantly throughout the show because Konata trolls her with constant animu references and copypastes her homework even though she lets her, which is why fanboys believe she is gay for Konata. She's also a fatass in her own eyes, constantly keeping an eye on her weight but doesn't do anything about it. Her non-existant love life is a hot topic on Konata's mind for some reason.

The only "action" she gets throughout the show from male characters is receiving a note from a boy which she misinterpreted as a booty call. Turns out he only wanted a toy she bought. Forever Alone. Like Konata, she has little to no tits.

Tsukasa Hiiragi

Kagami's twin sister, but has short hair and looks nothing like her. She is the polar opposite of Kagami in that she is a dumb shit with the attention span of a bag of cucumbers - evident when she left her phone in her pocket while her clothes got washed. So like Konata, she copies Kagami's homework. She is basically Lucky Star's Osaka, the only difference being that Tsukasa is good in the kitchen and doesn't mistake a knife for a frying pan.

Like the her sister and Konata, she also has invisible tits.

Miyuki Takara

The pink haired not-quite-loli character whose only reason for her existence in the show is to provide a pair of tits to reassure you the show isn't just for pedophiles. She's the bastard child of Wikipedia raping her mother (who is even more of a dumb shit than Tsukasa) and is therefore an annoying mega ultra super genius who provides explanations like why hair loses its color under direct sunlight, the difference between the cold and flu viruses and various other shit things the characters wonder about in their daily lives, when they could actually be doing something, like being funny.

She's scared shitless of the dentist, loves sleeping, and is scared of having contact lenses. She's also a bit of an airhead; most of the episodes revolve around her being clumsy or being a forgetful twat and being "moe". But never mind, glasses and poor hand-eye coordination will always be someone's fetish.

Yutaka Kobayakawa

Yet another pedobait moe titless character in the series, because Kyoto Animation studios and Kagami Yoshimizu (the series writer) honestly think that too much is never enough. She has pink hair, is even shorter than Konata, her clothes are too big for her and has negative tits. She lived with Yui before moving in with Konata. She calls Konata "onee-chan" despite the fact that Kona is - one, not her sister, two, she is two years younger than Konata, and three, probably smarter, even though she's a basement-dwelling lolli because she keeps catching colds left, right and center.

Minami Iwasaki

Basically a loli Sakaki with green short hair and no tits. She doesn't talk much and keeps mostly to herself. The only person she interacts with is Yutaka, probably because she's the only character flatter than her.

Misao Kusakabe

The bastard child of Tomo and Kagura, and maybe Nanako Kuroi if you note the enhanced left canine. She is athletic, and like most athletes, she is also mentally retarded. She likes to play games, but like most of the noobs on the internet, is completely useless at them. She hates Konata for stealing her lover Kagami from her, and has since had to settle for second best in her babysitter, fuck-buddy, and childhood friend, Ayano, and have been scissoring each other ever since. Be warned, the first thing all weeaboos point out is that her English voice actress, Lara Jane Miller, also voiced Kari from Digimon.

Ayano Minegishi

Geeks.

Misao's ginger friend, fuck-buddy, and babysitter with a fucking huge forehead. Both of them have been scissoring since she began to get used as a rebound by Misao, but she bakes a mean weed cookie.

Patricia Martin

A transfer student from the US who works at the same Cosplay Café as Konata. She is the perfect anime representation of a typical weeaboo faggot. She apparently learned her Japanese from anime and manga, which is why when she's saying hi, they think she's asking them if they're gay. Although, that in itself is still a valid question. Her only purpose in the series is to give fucktarded weeaboos unrealistic expectations about being accepted in Japan.

Hiyori Tamura

Amateur doujin artist who doesn't shut up about her hobby, who develops a crush on both Minami and Yutaka and begins to draw them as her yuri fetish, especially at moments when they're interacting with each other, although she draws other shit ranging from guys getting it in the ass to cuntmunching lesbians.

The usual unfunny Lucky Shit.

Akira Kogami

Junior high student and self-proclaimed idol and captain of Lucky Channel, the three-minute bit that runs at the end of every episode. She almost always starts off every Lucky Channel segment diabetes-includingly cute and happy-go-lucky, then degenerates into a chain-smoking sadistic bitch after Minoru, her assistant, introduces himself, meaning that about 2 minutes of every episode are dedicated to Akira bitching her stupid yandere ass off about why she wasn't put in the show. She's the anime embodiment of a forced meme, as she constantly begs the audience members to convince the staff to give her actual screen time, since fucking them for a part obviously didn't work. (But who can blame them)

Minoru Shiriashi

High school student in the same high school as Konata and her friends, appearing as "Sebastian" in the show; he is also the assistant on the Lucky Channel segment and he sang karaoke for the end credits of four episodes irl. Akira, who seems threatened by his very presence on the show, bitches at him constantly and treats him like shit. Eventually he snaps after she sends him into a dangerous hike into the mountains for some mineral water and destroys the set 2 episodes before the season finishes in an angry butthurt rage.

Minoru Shiraishi's voice actor is Minoru Shiraishi IRL, and it seems that he is waging war on Haruhiism.

Adults

Soujiro.
Kanata (left).

Soujiro Izumi

Like father like daughter., Soujiro is the basement-dwelling, lolicon-loving, incestuous-wanting otaku faggot, who Konata calls her dad. He is the Lucky Star equivalent of Kimura as far as his personality goes, and thus is a gigantic pedophile, even going so far as pining for his own daughter's arse. He has a hueg camera that he takes with him to local events so he can snap shots of titless Lolis and post them on the internets. He is responsible for Konata's possible gayness and infatuation with hentai pr0n, having read shitty yuri doujins to his daughter since she was 5.

Kanata Izumi

Soujiro's dead wife who is a ghost. She also looks about as young as her daughter, despite being at least 20 years old. When Soujiro and Kanata initiated the dance routine, it must have looked like awesome shit.

Yui Narumi

Konata's cousin. Despite being a police officer, she is a completely retarded blob of moe like the teenagers. Sometimes they even play dating sims, although this annoys Konata out of fear she's going to get Party vanned. Yui frequently comes to Konata's house shit-faced, and while drunk does stupid shit, like sliding around on some shitty Japanese chair. She has a husband, but he's nowhere to be found, she sometimes bitches about that.

Nanako Kuroi

Homeroom and history teacher, and also a basement-dweller. She wastes her time online with Konata at night playing Warcraft and flicking her bead to webcam streams of her student's jailbait cunt on MSN. Yeah, srsly. She's single, and sometimes hits on Yui because she doesn't know the bitch is already taken.

Meito Anisawa

Yui "Moeblob" Narumi, being retarded.
Meito Anisawa after getting jizzed in the eye

The dumb fuck who is hyperactive and a stereotypically overenthusiastic anime moron who spontaneously combusts whenever he gets excited. He works at the Animate store who sees Konata as "Legendary Girl A", who, with his 3 other accomplices, is always trying to sell Konata worthless anime shit and will stop at nothing to do so, bordering on rape in order to do it. But she never buys it, and whenever she doesn't they all act as though they've been defeated in som way or another. He appears once on the Lucky Channel, and no lulz were had.

The Hiiragi Family

Too many retards to name. Only ever seen during scenes where they're all sat at a table unsuccessfully answering the questions to quiz shows on TV, or seldomly interacting with Tsukasa and Kagumi individually.

Yukari Takara

Miyuki's mother, a stark contrast to her daughter.

Fanbase

Lucky star cumming COCK BLOCKED.JPG

The only three reasons weeaboos like to waste their time watching this show on Youtube are as follow:

  • The show has anime references pouring out its overrated ass
  • The characters' aspect ratio; they're all around 17-years-old but look like they're 8
  • Each girl's personality is designed to appeal specifically to different kinds of ronery otaku, which explains why you love it

It is extremely easy to troll the shit out of the Raki Sutah fanbase, as they are the figurine-collecting, futon-lounging, hentai-ogling otakus who most likely own at least one of those creepy pillows with an anime girl printed on it, and they honestly have nothing better to do than defend the show containing their imaginary loli girlfriends.

Lucky Star has also caught the eye of the hentai industry, thanks to its popularity with the lolicon characters among its fans, their favorite character being Konata, the blue haired girl with the retarded expression who every one of them wants to either fuck, see nekkid or getting it on with Kagami, or all three.

To get a clear understanding of the amazing individuals that constitute the Lucky Star fanbase, just watch these videos. WARNING: THESE VIDEOS MAY CAUSE EXTREME LOSS OF BRAIN CELLS, DEAFNESS, AND LOSS OF FAITH IN HUMANITY.

Gallery

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See Also

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Article of the Nao May 19, 2011
Preceded by
Cops
Lucky Star Succeeded by
The Rapture