My Chemical Romance

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Faggots (aka "My Comical Bromance" or "my chemical no chance" or commonly known by emos as "the only band in the fucking world") was without a doubt the most overrated emo band of homosexual emofags the music world has ever seen. But never say this within hearing range of any of their millions of fans, as they will defend MCR above all other things in life. For some unknown reason, probably to appease their millions of brainwashed fans, an MCR expansion pack is now available for the Xbox 360 version of Gitar Heroh II. In truth, just like any biker club it includes at least 2 Toby Keith tracks in its jukebox, the addition of this song serves simply as a means for the rest of us to screen the clueless douches who "rock out" to the dulcet tones of this fag-brigade. Also to note, the sheer irony that MCR's songs are harder to play on Guitar Hero than they are on a real guitar.

Band Members

It was that big!
Some people will do anything for teh cock.
Totally not gay

Gerard Gay

Gerard Gay is the biggest fgt in My Chemical Homance

In the words of Mark Adkins (of Guttermouth), Gerard resembles a fat pink raccoon, a fact that the band often gets hot and bothered about.

In an attempt to express himself and his political views Gerard then dyed his hair red. The attempt failed however, as absolutely noone cares. Even his diehard fans are LOLing.

Gerard believes he sounds exactly like Freddie Mercury, but he is only like him in that he can't get enough of that delicious buttsex.

On July 10th 2008, Gerard Gay was the subject of a particularly win prank that came spiraling out of the halls of Ebaumsworld. It began with the usual post of WHEN I WAS, then OP said to go to the MCR page on Last.FM and post RIP Gerard Gay 1977 - 2008. Soon, the page was full of comments, causing mass confusion among the emos. As the prank escalated, fake news reports and screenshots were created to help spread the news among various news sources like Digg and various emo forums.

Eventually the culprit was found when some newfag broke rules 1 and 2 on a guitar forum while trying to be funny. Then, screenshots of the /b/ thread was uploaded to the talk page of Gerard Gay on Wikipedia. The total raid/prank lasted at least 100 hours, and due to the spread of the news to such locations as Digg Yahoo Answers, and even IRL radio stations it was pronounced a win of the epic variety.

Gerard also claimed that emo is a load of fucking shit and he doesn't give a shit about it. He said his band isn't emo. Well Gerard, please cut your hair and also change your lyrics.

His denial that he is female has generated considerable lulz.

He also claims to "Save kids lives," which he doesn't. He just makes them fags/dykes.

Milkey Gay

This emo nerd is the brother of Gerard Gay. He used to bully his brother in high school which is the only mitigating factor of his association with this faggy band.

He used to wear glasses, which again adds to his lack of respect. In some South African countries wearing glasses is an arrestable offense so best if ole Mikey boy stays away.

Frank Iero

This guy is the height of a midget. Or you could say he's fun-sized. He once kicked Gerard Gay in the vagina on stage. Despite the promising lulz induced by this fact, he is still a total fucktard. He enjoys licking his guitar and being a pansy in his free time. Being completely unable to play his instrument and having made out with Gerard Gay on stage [1] multiple times would award him the title of the biggest faggot of the band. Yes, that's right, he is the one-and-only fuckbuddy of Gerard's and one day hopes to become pregnant with Way's baby. The fact that he sucked off James Muñoz, the lead singer of The Bled, for 20 dollars doesn't help his reputation as straight. His "marriage" to an actual woman is his backfiring gimmick to "prove" to the world he is not gay. However, this only heightens the fact that he is in midget-related-denial about his gay-ass sexuality and undying love for Gerard Gay.

Ray Toro

He would have to be one of the ugliest people to ever be squeezed out of a jackal's vagina. I assume he grew his enormous black person nose to take the emphasis off his face, unfortunately for everyone it didn't work.

Ray Toro is also the cause of many teenage girls and boys becoming An Hero, due to insane amounts of Ray/Gerard slash fiction. Many young children have died in the forest of his shaggy ass long hair.

Bob Bryar

From looking at this guy it's hard to see but he is in fact a lisped fag. He is also a former fatass and wears a clown wig. He might be the illegitimate son of that one guy from The Turtles. Not to mention, he's a ranga. He's also know to be a fucking crybaby, this was revealed to the wider world, when he was pwned by Jonathan Ross on British Television. Recent news has announced that he has LEFT! This has caused much bawwwwwing amongst fans, and also much lulz. A MCR fan had this to say about Bob's recent leaving: "Well all us mcr fans think that he's doing his side project full time", when we all know that he's just tired of getting buttraped by Gerard Gay

Onstage Behavior

Typical Onstage Behavior with The Used frontman Bert McCrackhead.

When MCR performed, the transvestite 16 year old girls had raging erections as they watched the members of the band have wild orgies on stage and play music every once in a while. Usually the singer Gerard Gay is making out with the midget (Frank) and has many times engaged in sexual activities with his brother Mikey Way because he likes it when Mikey sticks his nonexistent dick in his ass like he did when they were kids.

Fans

Pretentious spoiled rich kids coming from various parts of Surrey, Greater London, and the whole of the United States trying to rebel "the system". Identifiable by the fact that they look like girls and their complete lack of humour they are often seen hanging around local parks looking like anti depresant addicted fags, or for those who really want to seem like a complete pile of shit, crying at music concerts.

The Black Parade curse

The Black Parade was the biggest form of faggotry ever seen on the face of the earth.


Uh....wheres the autobots when we need them?

The Suicide Parade

The fans of my chemical romance marched on May 31st in London to protest against The Daily Mail's exposé on their suicide cult. Basically, they dressed in clothes only a true faggot would wear, held up signs and all... All this for some stupid 13-year-old an hero? Yes, it gets better from here on. Some 13-year-old kid killed herself because of emo music. In the protest, the emo fags claimed that "ZOMG MCR SVS PPL FRUM SEWISIDING!!!11oneoneone" When in reality, their music makes everyone want to commit suicide. Later on in this protest some random /b/tards started protesting against the protest.

Bottled

At the 2006 Reading and Leeds Festival, the event organizers had the brilliant idea of having My Chemical Romance play right after Buffy. The fortunate juxtaposition of alcohol, metal heads and faggotry resulted in massive lulz as MCR had the shit bottled out of them on stage as they performed. Large sections of the audience threw bacon, tangerines, golf balls, and bottles filled with urine at the group as they played. Gerard Gay then became unbelievably butthurt, and introduced a track saying:


   
 
This song is called Thanks for All the Bottles, Thanks for All the Piss, Thanks for All the Golf Balls, Thanks for All the Apples and Thanks for All the Sticky Shit.
 

 
 

Wut

They then proceeded to BAAWWWW and slit their wrists. Eventually one of the bottles struck Gerard Gay in the head and he was knocked out for several hours. This was considered by most onlookers to be the highlight of the entire year, the ferocious attacker himself was later made a knight and has since become Sir Jeffory McHigginns.

Notice how there isn't a single second where people stop throwing shit.

Bottled, Again!

Apparently, My Chemical Romance is as stupid as they are shitty. They didn't learn their lesson from their epic pwning at Reading and Leeds because they agreed to headline the Download Festival 07 instead of another shit band, Korn who were forced to play the shittier smaller stage resulting in much butthurt and injuries. Lulz struck twice as the MCR had the crap bottled out of them again. Despite putting out a pathetic 45 minutes that evening, Kerrang media gave them 5Ks out of 5 and played heavily edited versions (i.e. lack of bottles and avoiding the vacuous empty fields) of their shitty performance.

Soundwave Cancellations 2010

The Australian Soundwave tour was set to have My Chemical Romance performing. This created much rejoicing amongst their avid fans . BUT! A couple of weeks before the big event, they made note of pulling out of this event! Much bawwwwwing happened on the Facebook page for Soundwave. Many butthurt emos commented, saying they will not be going after buying a $150 ticket to the event since their favorite band had dropped out. The reason behind them dropping out was that Gerard had come down with a medical throat problem. We all know the truth though.

Comments on this article from MCR fans

   
 
"WTF?! You are all homophobic pricks. They make good music. and half the people that say call people homos are probbly suckin their moms own dick right now. So Fuck Off Tards."
 

 
 

BAWWWWWWWWW

   
 
"I'm not really bothered if people don't like mcr, but putting in gross and unnnessceary links to disturbing and unwated pictures is not needed. I also think that asking people to troll this forum is disgusting and shows that this person has no respect for other people and other types and taste of music dissimlar to their own. It's sickening and wrong."
 

 
 

BAWWWWWWWWW

   
 
"I really don't mind people who dislike my chem. not everyone has to like the same music as me, however i do dislike people who go out of their way to be annoying and fucking disgusting to prove that they are perverted and extremly discriminative to those of us that like mcr and mcr themselves."
 

 
 

BAWWWWWWWWW

   
 
"Yeah, i saw that earlier today. Yes, it was horrible to read, but not EVERYONE is going to be expected to love MCR. Anyway, they don't know anything 'cause it seems they only know who Gerard and Mikey (where's the rest of the band?) and they say fag over and over again like that's the only insult they can think of. These are just loser people who have no life. WHY DID YOU HAVE TO MENTION THE "MANY" THING?? lmfao Wow! Now I'M scarred for life -shudders-"
 

 
 

BAWWWWWWWWW

   
 
"Im the world's biggest fan of mcr,and i just can say that,if you dont like them,that's not a reason to insult them,or their fans,anyway,you listen to another kind of music,you will not like if we insult your favorite artist/singer,so please,be careful with wath u say,it may make that someone gets really angry.I LOVE U GERARD WAY!!!!"
 

 
 

????

   
 
"I started listening to them when their first album came out. Since then, I have hated the bands work.. except for the first album and I still don't know why. Well anyway I am with everyone else, but no one has listened to the first album. My favorite song is Early Sunsets over Monroeville. But yeah, Gerard is a douche."
 

 
 

Anal Clamp

   
 
"funny how all these dick cunts are like defending their personal opinion on these mcr buck toothed mop headed faggots but yet they wont let the person(s) who wrote the articles' point of view be expressed without critisism. shame on you you self-contradictive fat pink-racoon-loving pre-teen whores"
 

 
 

Truth

   
 
"MCR: Totally Pwned, fucken pussy cunts. Any dickhead who reckons they are punk is obviously very seriously retarded. Whoever wrote this is a complete legend."
 

 
 

Truth

   
 
"16-year old Girls coming to defend THIS band?? Gentlemen, man the harpoons."
 

 
 

LOL

   
 
"That first picture looks more like Gerard's mom to me. Or maybe his fugly stepsister. Anyway, Remembery that I suck my mothers cock :)MCR isn't that bad, but they need a good pwning every once in a while."
 

 
 

—MCR's only Mexican fan delivers his balanced judgment

Ladies and Gentlemen, The UltraBAWWW

On September 19th of 2010, User:Kitkatschemical blessed ED with a twenty thousand word manifesto of pure butthurt. It is preserved in its raw form here.

How my Chemical Romance Saved my life by A Weeaboo

And that was that, I guess… The pills weren't working, and so there wasn't anything left to do except put that big old kitchen knife to her throat. Or fly off the top of that big bank building downtown. Or take then entire bottle of those lovely little pills that were supposed to make everything better. I slunk across the floor of the house, silent at three in the morning, and unmoving under the silver moonlight except for me, trudging along with the bottle of pills in my hands. I laughed a little at the irony. These pills… this medication was supposed to make my life brighter and take away the depression and pain. They hadn't done their job, so they were being commissioned by me to perform one final fling. A contract kill that'd relieve the pain permanently. Seemed about right, to end a futile life that I was tired of living. I'm a fish in a barrel anyways; waiting to be picked out by the stronger, better part of society. I'd never last a day in the real, adult world anyway, so I might as well end it here. Seventeen years is long enough. I was in the kitchen suddenly, observing the slivers of moonlight that had escaped the barrier of blinds on the single window in the kitchen. I guess I had walked there, I didn't give much of a damn anyhow. I smelled the faint scent of bleach cleaner that remained from last nights after-dinner dishes, and the refrigerator hummed quietly in the dark. Hmm…bleach. Nah, that'd be kind of painful I think. Who gives a damn? I deserve as much pain as I can get. I'll just stick with a knife I guess. That's enough pain for me. I wandered over to the counter, mindlessly picking a knife out of the knife block; a decent sized butcher knife like the ones always used in those horror movies. Leaning up against the counter, I started thinking; should I leave a note? No, no one's gonna miss you anyway. Should I tell someone? Who is there to tell that wouldn't try to stop you? What am I doing? You're ending the endless pain…once and for all. With my butt up against the edge of the counter surface, I flipped the knife over in my hands. It reflected the moonlight and bounced it off the walls and cupboards behind me. A radio sat next to me, its red power light turned off. Maybe one last song wouldn't hurt. Making sure the volume was on really low, so as not to wake the parents up, I flipped the switch on and the power light glowed bright red. It was still in commercials, but just barely. A few seconds later, after a nice, catchy little tune for a bank or something, the announcer did his announcing thing; "Now back to the awesome tunes of today, for your late night rock and roll! I'll let all you hardcore guys and gals out there guess which band this is! Hint; This alternative rock band started in 2001 in Newark, New Jersey. Caller 8 after the song wins a free 108.5 tee and bragging rights, but enough talk, lets rock!" The voice faded away to soft piano playing. I scrunched my eyebrows. This doesn't sound like rock. I flipped the knife over again in my hands, as the vocals started; a young, seemingly shaky voice came in to existence over the radio waves. "When I was a young boy, my father took me into the city to see a marching band." Not bad, I guess. "He said, 'Son, when you grow up, would you be the savior of the broken, the beaten, and the damned?" … "He said will you defeat them, your demons, and all the non-believers? The plans that they have made? Because one day, I'll leave you. A phantom, to lead you in the city? To join the Black Parade." I was listening now, maybe even with half a mind. The voice had gotten more stern, and sounded like a singer now. There were guitars in the background and drums, and all the other instruments you'd need to make a good rock band. The vocals continued: "Sometimes I get the feeling, she's watching over me And other times I feel like I should go. And through it all, the rise and fall, the bodies in the streets. And when you're gone, we want you all to know We'll carry on We'll carry on And though you're dead and gone, believe me, your memory will carry on. We'll carry on. And in my heart I can't contain it, the anthem won't explain it." Wow, I actually liked this rhythm. The lyrics weren't bad either, and the singer had a nice voice. "And while that sends you reeling, from decimated dreams. Your misery and hate will kill us all. So paint it black, and take it back, let's shout it loud and clear. Do you fight it to the end? We hear the call, to carry on! We'll carry on! And though you're dead and gone, believe me Your memory will carry on, we'll carry on And though you're broken and defeated You're weary widow marches on! Now it got a bit grittier sounding, and I was paying almost full attention. On and on we carry through the fears Disappointed faces of your peers Take a look at me 'Cause I could not care at all Do or die, you'll never make me Because the world will never take my heart Though you try, you'll never break me We want it all, we wanna play this part Won't explain or say I'm sorry I'm unashamed, I'm gonna show my scar Give a cheer for all the broken Listen here, because it's only I'm just a man, I'm not a hero Just a boy who wanna sing his song Just a man, I'm not a hero I Don't Care! I could feel it… I could feel the song, and the meaning behind it, and how the author felt when he wrote it. I knew what he meant, and understood what he felt. I got it. We'll carry on, we'll carry on And though you're dead and gone, believe me Your memory will carry on, you'll carry on And though you're broken and defeated You're weary widow marches on Do or die, you'll never make me Because the world will never take my heart Though you try, you'll never break me We want it all, we wanna play this part We'll carry on Do or die, you'll never make me Because the world will never take my heart Though you try, you'll never break me We want it all, we wanna play this part We'll carry on! I put the knife down on the counter as the announcer revealed the title. "You just heard 'Welcome to the Black Parade', by My Chemical Romance! This band was started in 2001, by lead singer Gerard Way, and lead guitarist Ray Toro. Caller number 8, you were right, congrats!-" As this lucky person played a happy voice over the radio, I quickly shut it off and thought a bit. My Chemical Romance, huh? Well, My Chemical Romance, you seem to know a bit about depression, and how bad things can get. Gerard, I guess you probably know a thing or two about suicide. I pushed the knife away. God…what was I doing? I was going to end it all, thinking I was alone, wasn't I? I was going to end it all, and take myself away from everyone who loved me. My Chemical Romance Maybe I should look them up…they have good music. As I turned to the computer room, making my way silently to it, something clicked in my brain. Suicide would have been a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Maybe this whole music thing really could save my life.

"NOTHING IS WORTH HURTING YOURSELF OVER NO MATTER HOW SHITTY THINGS ARE GOING" -GERARD WAY, on being a hypocrite

Disbandment/Reunion

My Chemical Romance officially split up in 2013 and not a single fuck was given that day. Well never mind then. After 6 years, the emofags got back together on Halloween.

Gallery

See Also

External Links

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