From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Once known as nuclear magnetic resonance (NMR), the name of this machine was changed because the word nuclear makes people go batshit paranoid.
MRI is a spectroscopic technique that measures the precession, that is, rotation, of nuclei in a strong magnetic field, when pulsed with radio frequency electromagnetic energy. Through the use of magnetic field gradients, three-dimensional images can be produced, as well as sectional slices.
MRIs are big scary machines shaped like a tube. You get strapped down, possibly injected with noxious substances and then wheeled into the tube where you spend up to an hour being subjected to horrible loud banging sounds.
MRIs have been hunted to all but extinction by Al Gore and his Mooninauts.
People who work with MRI machines, known as "MRI Technologists" are also known to be full of unwarranted self-importance, and think that they are automatically better than everyone else in the hospital because they get to play with a big magnet.
People Who Wouldn't Fit in an MRI
—charminmonkey84 blaming her problems on somebody else
Some people are too fat to fit in an MRI. Radiologists use the euphemism
LBBHBALEETED which means "limited by body habitus", to refer to fatty-fats like the following grotesque caricatures of the human form:
- Iworshipsatin - The one who started it all.
- this is warmth
- Schol-R-LEA (Who certainly is lubed up most of the time, but still couldn't fit)
- Donut Girl - The Donut Girl
- Shay - Who was so unable to fit that she died of diabeetus.
- Donna Simpson
- Joe Blackburn
- Rosie O'Donnell
- Anthony 'A-Log' LoGatto
- Your Mom
- Everybody at WisCon
- Violent J
- Drew Pritt
- TeaAndZebraStripes - bonus points considering she's a filthy furfag