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Old media

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Old media, meet the inn(t)ertubes.
Always accurate.
Always hard hitting.
Old media is known for it's highly accurate dating

Is your neighbour terrorizing you with his latest gadget? Is your computer game playing sons back being benched like the banana of your husbands increasingly fat encrusted cock?

DON'T WORRY! We are now introducing media! If you buy a subscription now, you will also get a soffa ergonomically fit for your pear shaped rear. BUT WAIT, THERE IS MORE! Did you not get any romance as a teenager? Fox News! Do you know better than others? The Jew York times. Media, saving the world with one syllable at a time!


Old media is a Jew conspiracy that's heavily biased against you and your political viewpoint and philosophical stance. Therefore, everything bad that happens is most likely the fault of old media. As old media is old, it's neither cool nor funny. If you ever meet a member of the old media, be sure to give them AIDS. Old media is constantly screwing with our minds by telling us what to think. Also, parents love to endlessly discuss how the media corrupts our youth.

Last Thursday, the old media (New York Times) finally covered ED, much to the chagrin of moralists everywhere.

Contents

How new media corrupted everyone 4EVAR

First literacy corrupted the youth according to older generations....
Then books corrupted the youth according to older generations...
Then radio corrupted the youth according to older generations...
Then comic books corrupted the youth according to older generations...
Then television corrupted the youth according to older generations...
Then video games corrupted the youth according to older generations...
Then easily accessible Internet corrupted the youth according to older generations...
Then smartphones and tablets corrupted the youth according to older generations...

Luckily, we have impeccable older role models to tell us that we are permanently doing it wrong!

Examples

  1. Radio
  2. Television
  3. Tabloids
  4. Magazines
  5. Newspapers
  6. Web 1.0
  7. MRI
  8. BBS
  9. Email

Gallery

About missing Pics

See also


Old media is part of a series on Language & Communication
Languages and DialectsGrammar, Punctuation, Spelling, Style, and UsageRhetorical StrategiesPoetryThe Politics of Language and CommunicationMediaVisual Rhetoric
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