Metal Slug

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Metal Slug, The Bullet

A wonderful invention best known for making war more efficient and enabling people around the world to become an hero conveniently and easily. They usually come into a wide variety of shape and shiny colors, which make them great collector item, backup dildo (have you ever rammed up a 40mm grenade up your butt ? Shit is so cash) or defensive tools (though they all suck in their own way, for more information on how to troll someone's favorite bullet, go there).

Metal Slug, The Arcade Game Series


Metal Slug is the only 90s arcade game series worth playing. It is one of the only series that allows you to pwn zombies, azns, Arab, aliens and wannabe nazis occasionally all in the same game. Teh game is composed of 85% EPIC WIN and 23.5% Dr. Pepper.

The Graphics

Metalslug themovie.jpg

The games are also known for their amazing graphics, thanks to every single action having over 9,000 frames of animation, which of course makes it awesome. You see everybody running in a super-smooth running cycle? Awesome, isn't it? You see that hippie in his skivvies unfolding that sheet to give some crap to you? Man, that was the best unfolding I've ever seen. Hey dawg, check out that guy crouching. Not even you or I could crouch that realistically. Ah man, that is some tight idle stance! Dude, you know how Sonic the Hedgehog has that thing where he gets all uppity at you for being lazy? That is GARBAGE compared to this.

The Story

Basically you consistently go right, cutting, shooting, and blowing up spam raeping anything that moves. The enemy forces are led by some butthurt wannabe Hitler who looks too much like Saddam to get away with it. He eventually gets raped in the ass by retarded aliens and rescued just before getting tentacle-raped by their HUEG overlord. Luckily you get to rescue guys who keep huge guns in their underwear and happily give it to you in return for saving them from being almost raped.

The Weapons

  • Knife - Lets you shank people. Warning: Causes huge fountains of blood.
  • The Cho Seung-Hui Special - Great because it never runs out of ammo.
  • Heavy Machine Gun - Shoots so much lead the enemies die from lead poisoning.
  • Firebomb - The fury in a bottle.
  • Shotgun - Good for removing pesky squads of soldiers
  • Rocket Launcher - Not some pussy rocket launcher. These rockets are HUEG.
  • Metal Slug - A slow-ass tank that allows you to shoot things with two weapons at once.
  • Camel Slug - An immortal assault camel with two miniguns on his back.
  • Grenades - Make things go boom.
  • GrenAIDS - Gives those Arab AIDS.
  • Stones - ALLAH IS GREAT !
  • Homing Missiles : absolute pwn. You can just stand somewhere and mash the "fire" buttan and receive dead nazis.
  • Iron Lizard - Shoots toy cars with drills on the front.
  • Ball Launcher - Named after its one function.
  • Flamethrower - KILL IT WITH FIRE!
  • Lazer - Pre-charged, guaranteed to inflict massive damage
  • Supersonic Z Sword - An azn ripoff sword.
  • Hadouken - A weeaboo POW that follows you and fires lazers.

The Characters

The Gameplay

Like Contra with less frustration and more lulz.

Gallery of Rule 34

[1]--->Now here`s the link to a gallery of Metal Slug Hentai for all you sick fucks who were too lazy to type in "Metal Slug Hentai" on Google.

See Also

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