Michael Savage

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigation Jump to search
And trust us, Savage knows a thing or two about mental disorders.
Typical quote from Savage.

Michael AlanWeiner (no, seriously that's his actual name) is a short, obese, self-loathing homosexual Jew, better known by his badass WoW screen name, Michael Savage. He hosts the nationally-syndicated American radio show, The Savage Nation in America. He's American. He's conservative. He burns Muslims and eats autistic children. He hates everything except plants, shitty heavy metal music, and cock. He especially hates YOU. He was recently banned from Great Britain for being what the British government called "a little too gay, even for us."

Typical Savage listeners have an IQ of approximately 47, and believe they are going against the grain by listening to a fat Jewish plant doctor who pretends to be a redneck. In fact most are clinically retarded. Most of them fail to realize that he was actually a former liberal homosexual in San Francisco, but became a conservative because Allen Ginsberg refused to give him head one night at a party. He claims he was never a gay man, but frequently discusses his favorite types of sausage on his brilliant program. His faggot son invented the horrible beverage Rock Star Energy Drink (which literally tastes like urine) and dresses very homosexually. Clearly the apple did not fall far from the tree, amirite?

Savage admitting to rampant faggotry

W̶e̶i̶n̶e̶r̶ "Savage" admitting to Skinny-dipping with a bunch of beatnik faggots in Fiji, and posing for a Pr0n shoot with the gay pedophile Alan Ginsberg.

A Typical Episode of His Show

Mann Coulter, Larry Craig, and Michael Savage having a summit on conservative values.



—Michael Savage, engaging in his standards of a valid argument

He then goes on to bitch about all the worlds problems, most common are:

  • Why hasn't the Middle East been nuked from orbit.
  • Him bitching about getting kicked off MSNBC and being banned from the UK.

Savage And The Internets

Apparently it's OK to call for the death of the vice president, but it's not OK to say that you find lesbian marriage disgusting and nauseating and it makes you want to puke. This shows you why liberalism is a mental disorder.

Apparently a death threat is not as bad as homo -- let's say homo -- it's not even homophobia. What it is, from my point of view, is not homophobia at all. I don't fear lesbians who are married raising children. I have contempt for them. I think it is child abuse.


—Michael Savage

Mr. Savage is a badass mofo, and loves him some free speech. This is exactly why other online entities are not allowed to pose any negative opinions. Don't believe me? You're probably a left-wing fascist.

Savage and Aspies

Savage's book on how to properly treat your kids.

Savage has also aroused the ire of the aspie community, causing an immense amount of butthurt on the Internets. Last Thursday, Savage made the claim that kids with autism and their parents were part of a vast liberal conspiracy to collect welfare checks from the Government. This is because Savage not only hates kids with autism, but he hates poor people as well. All this stems from the fact that Michael is in fact a retarded Shylock growing up a poor Jew raped every night by his ugly swine father. Like most well-meaning people, Savage asserted that the following comments were taken out of context, by liberals seeking to have Savage's show removed from the airwaves:

Now, the illness du jour is autism. You know what autism is? I'll tell you what autism is. In 99 percent of the cases, it's a brat who hasn't been told to cut the act out. That's what autism is.


—Dr. Savage's educated assertion of autism and its effects on behavior in children

What do you mean they scream and they're silent? They don't have a father around to tell them, "Don't act like a moron. You'll get nowhere in life. Stop acting like a Jew. Straighten up. Act like a man. Don't sit there crying and screaming, idiot.


—Michael Savage, being a fucking douchebag

Butthurt ensued. Within days of last Thursday, as TOW reports, a steady stream of parents and grandparents of retards lined up at Savage's New York radio studio, and angrily protested. Companies that once sponsored the airtime that Savage's show worked on quickly withdrew support, and Savage decided to dedicate his next show to confronting offended parents. This, of course made for great justice on the part of some parents who had been seriously offended by Savage's santorum-coated comments:

I can tell you who is a brat. That would be Michael Savage, not the autistic people of Montana.


— Brian Schweitzer, governor of The Great State of Montana and father of a retard, epitomizing NO U

Several rich and beautiful celebrity parents of asspies issued statements filled with BAWWW, most notably the black person and the dumb bimbo who married Jim Carrey.

We find it shocking that the individuals who name-call and pass judgment on families like ours have had zero experience with the disorder


Holly Robinson-Peete and Rodney Peete, a.k.a. Mr. and Mrs. BAWWW

Savage, meanwhile, has retreated to the safe haven of his beloved blog, where to the frunz of his Republican fanboys who would give all of their precious Social Security money to have one drop of precum from his enormous e-penis, he made a half-hearted apology. As Michael Savage is a lolcow of the first order, he also has been prone to foot-in-mouth disease, which has been known to afflict other old media commentators as well. This was evidenced by an assertive NO U comment on the aforementioned blog:

My comments about autism were meant to boldly awaken parents and children to the medical community’s attempt to label too many children or adults as ‘autistic.’


—Michael Savage, failing miserably, lol

Savage's production company, in their half-assed attempt to save advertising dollars, set up a webpage containing over 9000 audio comments from Savage's show on autism. This webpage also contains a defensive TL;DR statement by Savage's production company in an attempt at clarification. Nonetheless, the over 9000 clips on the webpage not only outline Savage's views on asspies, but also expose Savage's extreme douchebaggery at attempting to even seem slightly compassionate about the subject of autism. If there is anything to be learned of this situation, it is that Michael Savage must be brutally raped for great justice, so that people like Chris-chan can finally be left to their own asspie freedoms, saving us from having to deal with their furry tendencies later in life.

Savage vs O'Reilly

Savage has been known to attack other conservative radio talk show hosts such as Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, Glenn Beck and Bill O'Reilly, on the basis of his opinion that they are either not true conservatives or are mouthpieces for the GOP. He is known in particular for his beef with O'Reilly, who started the fire by attacking his website content on his Fox News show:

Savage Likes Scifags

As of January 5th, after young Travolta died, Michael has voiced his outright support for Scifags. He even gave a book to one. And thus, Savage fans are forever mortified.

Expect funny calls in the following weeks from SeaOrgs.

England drops the banhammer on Savage

Savage is currently permabanned from the UK. The result was much bawing among butthurt Republicans and conservatives. He's been constantly bitching about this on his radio show ever since.

Savage Likes The Cock

The photo "Savage" doesn't want you to know about (SFW verison)
March 8, 1970

Dear Allen [Ginsberg]: After speaking to you on the phone about how nice the black-white thing is in mountain villages in Fiji, I walked downstairs to the school courtyard, where a little-known black brother looks at me, takes my hand gently, we do some old-world Lower East Side finger tricks, and he peacefully kisses the back of my hand—I do the same for his hand. I told him about our brief talk, and he says, "I must have felt the vibes."


—Michael Weiner

There is also rumored to be a photograph of him swimming nude in Fiji with Allen Ginsberg.

I choose to override my desires for men when they swell in me, waiting out the passions like a storm, below decks.


—Michael Weiner, Vital Signs

List of people Michael Savage has insulted in this article

Michael Savage occasionally acts like a fag.

Moar Links

See Also

Michael Savage is part of a series on
Gay Republicans
Michael Savage
is part of a series on
Raelian symbol.png
Patriarchs [-+]
Habitats [-+]
Traditions [-+]
H8s [-+]