My Tiny Dick
What would you do if you had been cursed with a penis so shriveled it literally inverted when you sat down? A penis so miniscule you would have to solicitit BJs from dust mites? A penis so small that daring to show it to another living being would cause them so much hilarity that Jesus laughs at it too and thus causing inevitable butthurt on your part? Well EDiots, if you're anything like these guys, you'd just get your bitch to give you a hasty thumb job, slip on some tight denim hotpants like it was any other Tuesday and sign yourself up for an account!
My Tiny Dick
The mytinydick.net forum is a veritable cornucopia of inconsequential cocks, a myriad of mini members, and the primary gathering place of the micropenised retards who actively seek this shit out. With usernames such as smallbutcute, whose email is shockingly [email protected] and juniorweewee, who loves to tell tl;dr stories about the action his little fella sees, it is not so hard to see why God afflicted them with such a terrible ailment. Although it's always good to put a positive spin on things, rite you guise?
Our man Drew here has much to say on the subject of his miniature appendage:
— You're Goddamn right she is, Drew. Hang in there big fella
Despite the fact that every woman is a big woman when what you are packing most closely resembles a cork resting on a bird's nest, many of these men talk of their BBW partners, and many speak of homosexual tendencies. The one thing better than having a tiny, tiny penis, is having a tiny, tiny penis while playing with another tiny, tiny penis. Apparently.
Considering its subject matter, mytinydick has remarkably little notable drama. There are obviously a fair amount of trolls, and plenty of people from the world of average sized dongs who pop in to make their 5 inch penis feel mighty, but nothing truly lulzworthy. Some juicy IRL drama came about with the case of a man who tried (unsuccessfully) to defend himself against seven counts of flashing by claiming that his nano-cock is too small to expose. Ya rly. In other news, it was revealed that Bernie Madoff, the epic IRL investment fraud troll, was also afflicted with the tinydick. See here for details, and cue many endowment jokes for great justice.
Every person is memorable on mytinydick, but the stories from users, specifically Juniorweewee make for great reading, as almost every post involves him fucking some hot chick who leaves him somewhere along the line for someone who isn't a faggot.
—Cool story there from [Juniorweewee]
Now our friend Juniorweewee has few posts all in all, but what he has is girthier than his tiny little member, but unfortunately, happens to be far less real.
User smallbutcute is a 24 year old Australian and an animu fanboi who likes the taste of his own cum. He wears tight denim shorts in order to make his dick shrink down even further. The burning question, is why?
Some of his more memorable quotes include
— smallbutcute there, demonstrating that having a small penis is not at all emasculating.
The main fetishes regarding small penises, or microphallises, to stick in a medical term in order to give weight to this ridiculous notion, usually slot quite neatly into three groups, each with their male and female/homo counterparts. These groups are as follows:
Small Penis Worship
As its name suggest, this group consists of those who worship those with a small penis, and the men with said minidick. Understandably rare, the small penis worshiping woman may have various reasons for wanting a (usually fat and old) man with no observable manhood.
- The woman may have been ræped, possibly by a big black cock, preferably violently. The resulting fear roots a penchant for things no more aggressive or bigger than baby mice.
- She may want to experience the joy of making love whilst retaining a tightness not usually afforded the average whore.
- She may be on really good commission.
- If male, the adoring victim of a small penis may be trying to glorify his own member. The fart near a tramp method of demonstrable phallic insecurity.
- Small cock = Childlike quality? Only you can decide
Small Penis Humiliation
"Now that's more fucking like it!" I hear you cry. Your resistance only makes my penis harder! The exciting world of Small Penis Humiliation. Well allow me to indroduce you to Mistress V, Mistress Dominique and many other "Mistresses" who want to rant at you for only $1.99 a minute. These horrendous women are utter shit, but the men who adore them, are where the lulz lie.
Could It Be You?
If you, like many boys out there, are unsure whether your manhood fits the bill, then please don't hesitate to get out a ruler, whip out the old fella' and size yourself up against some (surely trustworthy) people from some (unknown and unverified) study that this dude has definitely not just completely made up. C'mon guys, it'll be FUN!!
If they took the time to put it into a chart, then it must be true. Simple as.
—Some chick named Valerie, stating the obvious.
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|Featured article January 20, 2010|
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