Nebris

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The Lulztanic Sets Sails on October 3rd.

Nebris is a whiny, butthurt, INSANE LiveJournal user a who looks like a cracked out Gandalf and loves the flavor of delicious menstrual fluid.

While this introduction may seem on par with the likes of Snapesnogger, Trig Palin, and other mentally handicapped people, I assure you gentle viewer that it is not. Nebris is a 60-something self-hating male woymyn wiccan warrior, who fights against all that which is phallic and throbbing. He lives in a trailer with his white black person Lj-favicon.png magyarok-saman, who is a fat bitch who calls him her master and is constantly walking around the desert in California with Nebris's soggy, flaccid cock in her mouth.

Magyarok_saman, or Dreamerseye, is looking for someone to join them. Do you enjoy being beaten? You can be their next slave bitch!

Last Thursday, Nebris decided that his internet life of writing stupid fanfiction about a made-up God that he created was not enough. He became a whore desperate for e-fame and filed admittedly false DMCAs against jameth. He is also well known among the stupid_free and sf_drama crowds of LiveJournal for being off his fucking rocker. He claims to hold the seekret to fighting female moon time hormonal cramps, namely that he is totally down to be a pig bottom and slurp the shit out of your menstruating cunt. No one, however, should get within a 40 mile radius of him and his femayle wikkan coven because if you do, Nebris will murder your family.

WTF_OMGZ

Nebris was a known member of the community Lj-favicon.png wtf_omgz. It wasn't clear that he was crazy until he had a fight with one of the moderators of the community. It began here when Lj-favicon.png hatebot was announced as a new mod for the community. Nebris has since deleted his comment, but it was tl;dr anyway, and basically said Bawwwww.

Since crying about it in the community wasn't enough, here Nebris went to Lj-favicon.png kittydoom's personal LiveJournal and complained.

Kittydoom finally asks for an end to all the butt hurt here.

Although he was banned for his whining, Nebris will forever be remembered in the Lj-favicon.png wtf_omgz community, and others like Lj-favicon.png omg_too_soon, for being batshit crazy, as evidenced here. Goodnight sweet prince

In Lj-favicon.png ontd_political, Nebris has also made his mark. Here is more evidence of him being god damn crazy, but at this point it is entirely tl;dr, so you should just trust me and get in the car, I'm a friend of your mothers.

HOSTILE NIGGER CUNT

Nebris has also had a run in with Lj-favicon.png Qweerdo, in which he said


   
 
I am unable to email you this notice, so I have little choice but to post it here as a comment. This is to notify you, in writing, that I desire no further contact with you, including, but not limited to, comments, posts, email. This includes posts you may make, from this point forward, which may reference me, either by name, circumstance, quote, or photograph. In addition, you are being told to remove any and all links to photographs which you may have recently posted.

Failure to respect this notice may lead to complaints to all service providers involved, as well as possible legal action.
 


 
 

— Nebris has the Internet Lawyers on hold

You can read more about it here, which also reveals that the wizard once called Lj-favicon.png auntiesiannan a "hostile nigger cunt", which leads to more drama that is juicier than a menstrual clot.

The Drama Begins...

Other than the Lj-favicon.png wtf_omgz drama, Nebris had a cameo in the The Great Livejournal Strikethrough of 2007. The real lulz began when he ordered a DMCA that resulted in the suspension of auntiesiannan. What horrible offense did she commit? She posted a picture of Nebris.


jameth, sensing the Lulz potential, posted a link to a shoop'd picture onto his personal LJ.

The picture that got jameth his DMCA.

Nebris then filed a DMCA stating that the image belonged to him EVEN THOUGH HE KNEW IT TO BE A FALSE CLAIM. All the while, he was supported by Lj-favicon.png magyarok-saman, who is completely mental and refers to herself as Nebris' Slave Companion. She is also a fatty, YEAH HUH. YEAH HUH

The fact that Nebris filed a DMCA with LiveJournal Abuse is made over 9000 times more lulzier by the fact that Nebris once said this about people who report to LJ Abuse:


   
 
You thereby prove you are a narc and a Kapo.
 

 
 

— Nebris being a god damn hypocrite

Anyway, Jameth then posted a Google maps image of a roadtrip he was planning to take. Both Nebris and his friend magyarok-saman began flipping shitkittens because his destination happens to be their hometown. The plot then thickened like menstrual fluid in a Wiccan wizard's mouth.

Here Nebris responds by explaining that his household has a "three shot" policy, and that his home is multi-gun establishment. Of course, Nebris also notifies the local sheriff and the FBI. Not to be outdone in the batshit crazy category, magyarok-saman decides the best course of action is to post "a warning to James and all his friends":

You will be greeted by two people. One will be holding a loaded shotgun, the other a phone dialed to 911. The sheriff is right around the corner, and they have been warned about you.

Of course, what drama would be complete without a Bel Air? This is a story all about how my life got turned, flipped upside down...


Guess what? Nebby and Maggy are STILL crazy

Nebris would love to have his butt licked.
A picture of Nebris' thinspiration.
Nebris fan art

magyarok-saman has further proven what an idiot she is here, by not only displaying her inability to grasp sarcasm, but her failure to understand the concept of a P.O box.

Nebris apparently learned all his insults from the third grade, because here he says to Lj-favicon.png scottrossi (of the Caroljoy wank):


   
 
You're an ugly lil toilet whore and therefor do not matter...
 

 
 

— Nebris has SUCH a potty mouth!1!!11!!

scottrossi proceeds to half-drunkenly tear into Nebris over and over in a flurry of hurled verbal excrement that made Gods die:

   
 
How am I a toilet whore? I don't engage in scat or watersports, which is a far cry from the cheese lickings you have to engage in to eat your precious LELE out. BLECK. And I matter plenty. You sir, are the one who is utterly, painfully irrelevent, and nobody up until now has had the wherewithal or the heart to break it to you booboo. Your followers? They humor you. Your spirit guide E? He humors you. He loves you too much to tell you to get medication because your brain is jacked up. And fine, call me a toilet whore, it is an unfounded accusation and everyone knows that. But the elephant in the room is that you are a motherfucking CHILD MOLESTER. YOU ARE A FUCKING PERVERT MOTHERFUCKER AND YOU SHOULD BE GASSED BY THE STATE AS A TUMOR YOU FILTH!
 

 
 

and then scottrossi realized that Nebris called him an UGLY toilet whore... and the rage and froth began to fly:


   
 
wait a minute, WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE. Did I just read this right? Forgive me for being blinded by the tears of lol, but did you, YOU? JUST CALL ME, ME? UGLY? Hold the fucking bus. Pump your brakes. YOU, calling ME ugly? OH LOLOLOLOL honey, I don't fucking think so. nononononononono. Not in this world, not in any fucking world. You see, beauty isn't all about the outside, which you, as a "light worker" should motherfucking know. You sir, are a disgrace to the profession. Shame on you for even lingering and stirring shit. How on earth is this working for the greater good? How on earth and in heaven is this bringing any light to the universe? For shame! I am beautiful on the outside and the inside. You won't ever have the pleasure of knowing this, but I assure you, it is the Gods' honest truth. Your little delusions of grandeur have led you astray Nebris and I am here to call you out on this. I don't claim to be a light worker, but I sure as hell bring a lot of it to this world. I don't lie about people, I don't make false accusations and I try to make the world a little bit better when I wake up each day. You sir, are a pox on the puckered asshole of humanity. How fucking pathetic, you, a sixty something busted ass piece of shit waging a holy war against a bunch of bored ass teens and twenty and thirty somethings. Does that give you a chubby? The delusion that you are relevant to this generation? That you have some say or some influence? Does that small protrusion of scab covered skin grow hot and firm at the thought that you might leave some glorious footprint on history? Oh no, that's right, it is the milky smoothness and innocence and grace of little girls that makes your sex hot and sets your loins aflame. How is the PTSD from that time the police questioned you? Did you tell the Sheriff that you were a suspected child sex offender? I thought not. The awesome thing about truth, Nebris is not only that it can set you free, but it also ALWAYS COMES OUT AND IT ALWAYS WINS. You are filth and you are pathetically, laughably irrelevant.
 

 
 

and before departing from the thread, scottrossi closed with this little gem:


   
 
You are so fucking stupid. I love how your icon makes you look thin. You are really an old, gray, fat, Jabba the Hutt lookin' motherfucker. Your stomach is probably brown and cratered and half hanging to your knees past your balls. GTFO this community and stop making yourself into a spectacle. Actually, no, belay that, don't fucking stop. Everyone here is laughing at you. James was in the NYT long before Weev was. And why the hell are you namedropping Weev? Do you want him to come along and say hello? I am sure you'd love that hornet's nest, after all, you let magyarok_saman sit on your revolting dick with her gross bumpy snatch, so I am sure hornet stings aren't a far cry from what you are used to. You really are rather pathetic. I mean, come on now, you are what, 60? It's time for you and your slut to put down your walrus fronds, GTFO the internet and go visit the food bank so you can keep that revolting walking corpse you call a body intact for your spirit guide. And pls, continue to try to curse us and use your lightbringer powers to try to stifle us. I will continue to wage a battle of wills with your skrundley ass and call on the divine power of the new deities, the SPACE CAT GODS. you will, of course, be smitten. The end, love scott
 

 
 

And again, if someone does show up to his bunker in California, and is killed, Nebris is not to blame. Of course, if some true crazy - Jameth is a paper tiger - shows up here and we kill them, well, some of these Trolls will not be laughing for a while as they 'created an atmosphere of hatred' and Live Journal, Inc allowed said atmosphere to flourish.

Ave Nebris

Lj-favicon.png cparamo and Lj-favicon.png Hardoncollider produced a song, written and performed by Lj-favicon.png Hildeaux titled Ave Nebris

Note should be made that every line (except for four) in Ave Nebris are direct quotes from the wizard himself Nebris

Radical feminist witch
Recruiting for my Temple
So spread those sweet thighs of yours
Lesbian cyberwitches
The Male must End
I am just stirring the pot,
like any effective witch will do
And Halloween witch costumes
constitute
hate speech

Sue the bastards

DMCA

Jameth posted a link
Oh, Livejournal Abuse
Now we're going to court
Formal Do Not Contact Notice
You hostile nigger cunt
This is a multi-gun household
Current mood: hostile & litigious
It's not free speech to spam my journal
It's verbal terrorism

Tilde M tilde

SAVE YOUR TAMPONS I'M MAKING TEA.
Proof that the moon times conversation existed.
Nebrismacro.jpg

Save your tampons, I'm making tea

Nebris cares about his community. So when a friend complained about her period cramps, Nebris offered to be her own personal douche bag:

Actually, the best remedy for Moon Time cramps is a regular application of oral sex (girl received). Sadly, far too many girls find this ookish. But I have administered it many times and it's never failed.

The entire conversation is here


The Spirit E

THE ONLY RECORDED IMAGE OF THE SPIRIT E.

Nebris, in addition to enjoying a nice cup of poon juice, has been channeling a spirit guide named E. No I am not making this shit up.


   
 
If laid is all you want, then just spread those sweet thighs of yours at the first opportunity.
 

 
 

—The Great Spirit E on how to get fucked


   
 
But the bidet rose up to meet Niniskil as she entered. She smiled at the obscene decadence of the thing as she mounted it like a saddle, resting her shins and knees into the long 'stirrups' that formed under them, and her ass against the semi-seat that actively cupped her upper cheeks. A stream of pee hissed out of her, hot and tart smelling. The nanites in her body were busy scrubbing her blood and tissues, cleaning out the cocktail of chemicals from last night.
 

 
 

— A selected reading from one of Nebris' Witch Stories


   
 
Two friends came over, got drunk, had a fist fight, then all three of them 'raped' her for hours.
 

 
 

— Nebris condones rape

An entire community is devoted to E and its teaching, Lj-favicon.png e_speaks. Encyclopedia Dramatica is the source of the only known recorded picture of E as caught by scottrossi while visiting both him and jameth at their respective places of employment.

Related Links

See Also

Portal lj.png

Nebris is part of a series on

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Featured article October 3, 2008
Preceded by
Tom Serson
Nebris Succeeded by
The Rolling : MTV Gets Rickroll'd
Featured article October 7, 2008
Preceded by
Dadagiri
Nebris Succeeded by
Dadagiri