Not Jewish

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A common term used by people accused of being Jewish. Often used with remarks such as "Jews don't exist" and "looks or names can't be connected to ethnicity in any meaningful way", as if having a hook-shaped nose is not reason enough to be sent to a concentration camp.


  • "I myself am not Jewish, but I'm afraid of Germans."
  • "I'm not Jewish, but I hate bald white people."
  • "I'm not Jewish, but I hate Arabs!"
  • "Linda Mack is not Jewish."
  • "Don't talk about my mother like that."
  • "Anyone could be an expert on stock exchange."
  • A: "I can't smell it." B: "I hate bagels."
  • "The people on this list do not consider themselves Jewish."
  • "I'm not Jewish, but I have Jewish friends/a Jewish girlfriend."
  • "Court has ruled consensus that this person is not Jewish."
  • "All they did was kill the savior of mankind, what's the big deal?"
    • Because if they didn't kill the savior of mankind, there would BE no savior of mankind. No crucifixion, no Christianity. You should be THANKING Judas.
    • Jesus was Jewish himself, so they just killed one of their own, and at that time, Christians were a cult of Judaism. HAHAHA DISREGARD THAT, I AM A JEW.

Optional Euphemism: "secular" Jew(ish)


  • "The Hollywood/San Fernando Valley Pornography Industry is dominated by secular Jews."
  • "Aliza Shvarts is a secular Jew."
  • "My maternal grandmother is Jewish."
  • "I converted to Judaism, but the rabbi told me to GTFO! I flunked the test. Those college educated Jews always get the right answers."
  • PC doublespeak time : "After the attacks on 9/11, Jewish Americans oppose the harsh treatment, xenophobia and media vilification of Arab Americans, American Muslims and South Asians in this country".

Notable People who are also Not Jewish

See also

Fact Of The Day

No link at all.

The Nazis defined a Jew as anyone who either 1) had three or four racially full Jewish grandparents, 2) belonged to a Jewish religious community or joined one after September 15 when the Nuremberg Laws came into force or 3) had a big nose. Definition 3) has since been inducted into the Library Of Congress Archive Of Classic Jokes.

External Links