PeanutFreeMom

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Um yeah hi...

Twitter-favicon.png PeanutFreeMom, aka Debra Jones-O'Brien: "Life Coach, Career Mom, Peanut-Free Advocate" from Natick, Massachusetts; is a confirmed, yet still hilarious troll account on Twitter. The account itself is a satirist portraying an upper-middle class, single mother, divorcee soccer mom who is so smug and easy to dislike that "she" gained 5,000 followers in the first week after the account was opened.

She is a skilled troll who uses phrases like "Nut allergies can be worse than AIDS" to bait the NORPs on the microblogging site into arguing with her, only to reply to them with outrageous self-oblivious retorts that are obviously written to piss people off. Even after multiple news articles have been written calling out the fictitious account, dumb newbs continue to feed the troll every day. It is almost as fun watching these people get outraged at the posts PeanutFreeMom makes as it is to troll Casey Anthony haters.

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Parenting tip: Make sure your child care providers have strong Anti-Bullying policies. Teasing can be deadly.
 

 
 

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A mother told me she can't afford to buy her groceries at Whole Foods. Um yeah, hi, can you afford insulin shots for little Carlos?
 

 
 

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People with tattoos look like unemployable drug addicts, IMO.
 

 
 

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In many ways peanut and tree nut allergies are far more serious than AIDS.
 

 
 

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If you expose a child afflicted by food allergies to their allergen (even by accident) you should be fined or possibly face jail time.
 

 
 

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Why would anyone in their right mind give money to an animal shelter when there are so many starving children in the world?
 

 
 

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"Don't Mess With Texas" sounds like a hillbilly slogan rather than a state slogan. I bet it's on all the bumpers at the trailer park.
 

 
 

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Skateboarding seems to be a 'sport' for boys with parents who have stopped caring. Um yeah, hi, stop skating outside the post office.
 

 
 

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I only offer my services as a life coach to friends and neighbors. It's a very fulfilling occupation.
 

 
 

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Canada should observe the 4th of July too. Um yeah, hi, we PROTECT you.
 

 
 

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I enjoy watching men's tennis. The noises the women make during a match sound inappropriate.
 

 
 

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People care about what I have to say, that's why I have followers and you don't. So yeah.
 

 
 

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Parenting Tip: The term 'playdate' can sound too feminine for boys. Try calling them 'hang-outs' or 'come-overs'.
 

 
 

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Um yeah, hi, people who wear Size 5 jeans aren't 'trolls'. P.S.- I've had a child.
 

 
 

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I refused an epidural when I had Caleb. That's why we're so close now. Also the divorce.
 

 
 

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Sad day. Caleb's turtle died. Coincidentally our neighbor's mother died last night. Be careful, these things usually come in threes.
 

 
 

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A father at Caleb's swimming lesson said he liked my shoes. He backed right off when he saw I had pepper spray.
 

 
 

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Parenting Tip: Try calling carrot sticks 'Power Sticks'.
 

 
 

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Parenting Tip: When you give your child TV time, put on the Closed Captioning so they can read as they watch!
 

 
 

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E-mailing my State Representative. This harassment on Twitter is too much. Um yeah, and I'm naming names...
 

 
 

Twitter-favicon.png PeanutFreeMom

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Featured article July 27 & July 28, 2011
Preceded by
Anders Behring Breivik
PeanutFreeMom Succeeded by
Dating Sim