Paul Reubens

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Pee Wee has candy for you.
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Pee Wee, looking inside a huge Goatse.
Pee Wee showing Yvonne how to walk like a proper lady.
This man entertains children.

Paul Reubens is an unfunny retard pedophile who somehow managed to get famous. His main character is a faggot of epic proportions, Pee Wee Herman. After failing it while trying to get on Saturday Night Live, he successfully landed a contract with HBO. This was the beginning of the shitstorm of stupid that was to follow, and unfortunately still continues to this day.

The Pee Wee Herman Show

This show basically consisted of Pee Wee standing on stage and pulling shit out of a paper bag. Can you say "ghey"? Of course you can.

Pee Wee's Big Adventure

Pee Wee loves his bike.

Teh Best movie Evar. Some movie execs at Warner Brothers Studios were smoking crack one day, and decided to let Paul Reubens make his very own movie. The touching story of a fruity, albino, Malcolm X-dressing motherfucker who has lost his bike and spends the rest of the movie searching for it. It also gave Tim Burton a job, which he did for the lulz.

The only scene that matters.

Big Top Pee Wee

Paul Reubens got to make another movie which involved a circus. Nobody really cared enough to remember anything more about it. Except for Chris CrockerLEAVE PEE WEE ALONE!

Pee Wee's Playhouse

The ramblings of Pee Wee Herman on peyote set to television, Pee-Wee's Playhouse is was an obnoxious show that steadily lowered viewers' I.Q.s by the minute. Talking chairs, wish-granting genies, and a friendly mail-woman. And a robot too. After being completely forgotten since Last Thursday, it came back on Adult Swim. The only person who watched was you.

Pee-wee's Big Holiday

Of course, there just HAD to be another feature film dedicated to this demented pedofuck. Sometime in 2016, Paul Reubens starred in Pee-wee's Big Holiday. Pee-Wee fanfags got involved with this in the really early stages and managed to leak what existed of the film hinted in one of Reuben's private conversations in 2010. It all began when a journalist called Reuben's manager and questioned weather a film was in the works, to which the manager confirmed this statement. Reubens' chucked a pissy-fit and decided to postpone the production of the film because "The whole thing got leaked and we had just started."

Four years after the initial leaks, Reubens' crawled out of his lonely, isolated man-cave and pursued his wet dreams. On March 17th, 2016, this movie premiered exclusively on NetShits! And not a single fuck was given.

I wish I could tell you about it right now, because... I mean, it's amazing. It's going to be amazing. I think it first got leaked four years ago or so that the movie was going to be made, and ever since then it's just been stalling and stalling. So I'm really ready for this to happen. But I'm not kidding: It's very imminent.


—Paul Reubens desperately trying to convince losers to watch his "amazing" award-winning movie.


Holy fuck, Alia Shawkat (the Indian that voices the poundcake character from Adventure Time) starred in this film. God help us all...

Pee Wee's Real Life Adventures

  • 7/26/91 - Paul Reubens is arrested in Sarasota, Florida for fapping in an adult theater and instantly reduces himself to one-liner meme status. Much lulz ensues.
  • 11/15/02 - Pee Pee Herman turns himself in to Los Angeles police in November 2002 after being charged with misdemeanor possession of kiddie porn.

See Also