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PewDiePie

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Police.gif This retard has turned off his comments due to butthurt.


Jewsyoulose.jpg

WARNING:

With Jews, you lose!


No Photoshop used; his chin really is bigger than his face.

Youtube-favicon.png PewDiePie (Powerword: Felix Arvid Ulf 'yahudi' Kjellberg) A.K.A. JewDiePie, is a Swedish jewfag and Youtube-favicon.png pedophile. He and his dildo-quiver archer girlfriend currently make big money on the tubes making "Let's Play" videos, which is apparently something that certain people have taken quite the liking to over the years, namely the brainless 8-12-year-old crowd that makes up just enough of YouTube's users to grant PewDiePie the unwarranted pseudo-fame he's got today. Pewdiepie's fans, desperate for an idol with the same undeveloped, immature sense of humor as they themselves have, but still someone who's old enough to rape them without mercy, they worship PewDiePie on a level that would be considered unhealthy by most cultists.

Unlike most gaming videos on YouTube, however, don't even begin to expect the ones created by PewDiePie to contain even the faintest attempt at sensibility, reality, humor, or actually witty commentary comprehensible by humans. Instead, try to imagine being in the same room as a mentally handicapped basement-inhabitant who can hardly play a video game properly without screaming like a raped cunt as soon as something even remotely scary (or something that isn't scary at all) happens. Now imagine the same procedure being repeated enough times to cover 1300 YouTube videos, and you'll get the basic idea of just how fun it must be to be a part of PewDiePie's obviously not mentally healthy fanbase.

As PewDiePie's most noticeable trademark is that he clearly doesn't give two shits about actual video quality as long as he still gets to make money, he regularly tries to Youtube-favicon.png lie about everything and deny this, but the fact that he only wants your money can plainly be seen in his large nose. Despite his claims, he still likes to flaunt his donations and 50 dollars a week income he gets from YouTube views.

Unfortunately, he can't escape his Swedish heritage of being remarkably unfunny. The closest thing he ever gets to entertaining is playing Happy Wheels while making incredibly stupid voices and recycling played-out Justin Bieber jokes. That is, of course, until he decided to make 70 videos worth of that shit and ruined what minuscule chance there was that he at least wouldn't fuck that up.

Contents

Variety hates you for having none

Andrew Wallenstein of Variety magazine heavily criticized pewdiepie when it became the most subscribed channel, describing his videos as "aggressive stupidity" and "psycho babble". Even with something like Variety hating his guts, the 11 year old PewDieFags still will try to defend their lord to the death with getting into comment wars with actually intelligent adults, pulling out the typical jealousy and hater cards, and mentioning things like Ragnarok and Hitler. Srsly. Take a look at the comments section and see all that bubbling cancer.

Copypasta Quotes

   
 
Oh really now. I thought this was going to be an informative and credible site but clearly, whoever wrote this is OBVIOUSLY a hater that has pure envy against the most popular person In almost the entire world. Anyone who blathers like an idiot would HAVE to be you. And I am saying this on behalf of the over 30 million fans, including me, of the one they call Pewdiepie.
 

 
 

PewdiepieLuver

   
 
Ignore This Bros, Its Just His Garbage
 

 
 

—PewDiePie impersonator number #482472

   
 
lol.. someone needs to get a real life. The one you have now is a sham…erm shame.. oh well same difference. I think someone should should stop trying to speak for entire demographics.. because that is ridiculous. What a joke man. Really.. watch it or don’t but please, oh please shut the f up.
 

 
 

—Some dude named Alex

   
 
How can you hate a guy that has used his popularity to collect over 450,000 dollars for water charities in countries that don’t have clean water? He may not be in your taste, but he does more good with his fame than you would think at first glance.
 

 
 

—Tyrone. It's funny cause all that Jew Gold went to his GF instead.

   
 
My IQ is 143 (No joke, I took a test :P) and I like PewDiePie. You mad bro? OH WAIT!
 

 
 

—No, but you sound mad, Bob.

   
 
Who you are to have the right to judge people?
 

 
 

—Stephano impersonator #725

   
 
Seriously?!? This is the most idiotic article I’ve ever read.Serious though pewdiepie is amazing ur probably to stupid to see that though. Your only saying this because your probably jealous anyone who thinks pewdiepie is annoying is probably annoying them selves but then again u probably work for Obama!!!!!!!! Bro fist to the face
 

 
 

—Carissa, who probably fingers herself to his Swede voice.

   
 
i am 1 of pewdis subscribers on youtube hi is the best youtuber i relly wont to meet him
 

 
 

—ghostviper. Here's your cancer for the day.

   
 
Author is also ignoring the hundreds of thousands Pewdiepie has raised for charity and I suspect is a little sore about someone being successful and popular. The bitterness is strong in this one…
 

 
 

—David, with the mindset that donating absolves you of all crimes.

   
 
You blithering old fart, I feel insult that you can talk so horribly about someone. What exactly have you done that so great? Felix is able to use his fans to drive huge positive force into charities and Independent game developers. Not only that he can boost channels hugely and entertain millions. Yes he swears but so does 99% of all famous people. Look at some positives for a change
 

 
 

—David Emery. How do you feel insult again?

   
 
Andrew Wallenstein, Pewdiepie makes more money than you, AND reaches far more people than Variety (aka That Toilet Paper) on a daily basis. Andrew Wallenstein, you belong to old tech no one wants, and your obsolescence makes you jealous of those better than you. Andrew Wallenstein, over 10 million people know who PewDiePie is. Who are you?
 

 
 

—Andrew Carvin, yet another 12 year old assburgers kid disrespecting his elders.

   
 
Pewdiepie can laugh his way to the bank/Haters like you make him more rich./I mean come on this is from an eleven year old girl and I even have more sense than you.
 

 
 

—Anna, breaking the rules of the internet by showing her age, totally making sense.

   
 
Hey, this article was just mean. You can’t just slander a guy like that. Calling him names like “Dolt” and “Idiot” are just a sign of bad writing. And no, I’m not a Pewdiepie fan. But I have a respect for him and the success he’s achieved, unlike you.
 

 
 

—David. BAWWWWW

   
 
Why are you bashing pewdiepie like this? You might not like him but that doesn’t give you the right to call him an idiot. So here is a word of advice. Go fuck yourself. Fucking prick
 

 
 

—Jack, not knowing what an editorial is.

   
 
To all the people out there who don’t like pewdipie: Just because you don’t like him doesn’t mean everyone else hates him too. I watch Pewdiepie and I’m not a stupid blubbering idiot ( which is what you guys call his fans). I’m a straight A student in honor classes, Gate, and I’m trilingual (which not many of you guys can say that you are) and after all the stress and the work I have to do to keep up my grades I also have to help my mom around the house (as in cleaning, cooking, babysitting, tutoring my brothers, and even doing the laundry). The only person who could actually make me smile after all that is Pewdiepie. And if you guys don’t respect that, then you guys are the stupid idiots, not us bros.
 

 
 

a pewdiepie fan, rubbing in the fact that he/she sounds smart.

   
 
I never thought the Editor-In-Chief of Variety would post an article without any facts/statistics about an innocent YouTuber who just undeniably entertains and amuses over 13 million children, teenagers, and adults. Shame on you.
 

 
 

—Sadie H, yet another loli that doesn't know what an editorial is.

   
 
I am not going to start off with the average anger comments, but just a rather simple list of counter agreements. First off, PewDiePie is not a revolutionary figure for the sake of this world’s future, teenagers don’t appreciate him as a god, (from what I can tell), nor will they run around, screeching quotes from a YouTuber. Second, 12.6 million subscribers is a great achievement for Felix, in fact he just received a Guinness World Record for doing so. Third, YouTube’s “greatest” form of entertainment is NOT PewDiePie, yes I suppose you can use some garbage filled sentences saying how Felix is a “psycho” or “slack-jawed” doesn’t sound very professional, though you might be going for amateur I myself don’t know. Lastly, PewDiePie doesn’t want fame, or glory necessarily, sure there are a whole lot of lies in this world, the whole world will eat itself someday… Anyways he does it for the pure entertainment of anyone who enjoys his blabber mouthed comments and insane videos. YouTube hasn’t shown one bit of evidence of saying that it is THE best entertainment of videos they have, but he is the most popular of now, of who all is followers are.
 

 
 

—Parker. You will believe a PDP fan can have a brain.

   
 
Listen here you barrel YOU are the blithering idoit, you have no clue the possible and direct joy pewdiepie brings kid’s teenager and ADULTS alike, i personally know from experiance i found pewdiepie while going through extreme depression and his videos helped me get through the day’s. I don’t know what you think you can achieve through blathering like an ass about pewdiepie but you will get nothing from it but hate comment’s replies ETC. . . have fun
 

 
 

—The supposed Bro Army. Definitely sounds like it and sums it all up.

   
 
the guy who made this can go KISS MY ROYAL IRISH ASS. if it wasn’t for pewdiepie i would be dead people at my school treated me like i was shit they called me names pushed me around and the freinds i did have fucking back stabed me and left me in tears if it wasn’t for pewdiepie’s perverted dumn and stupid sence of humor i would be dead and pewdie if your reading this i want to thank you and pewdie help me make freainds to now i allways have something to live for pewdiepie and my bro’s
 

 
 

—Angelina, saying PDP prevented her from being an hero.

   
 
8 million people can’t be wrong. I, for one, love his videos. They make me laugh so much. I’d gladly take Pewdie’s “psychobabble” over the evening news. The author of this article clearly does not understand the direction that Youtube is taking or what it takes to have a successful channel.
 

 
 

—JFPD. Yes they can.

Previous Quote | Next Quote
Even France is funnier and has more balls than PewDiePie.


Characters that appear in his videos

Since PewDiePie is both batshit insane and constantly desperate for supposedly "comedic" scenarios, he occasionally strikes up unintelligent conversations with inanimate objects or characters from the video games he talks over, and his fans find this gimmick funny only because they will find anything funny. Anything.


His gallery of memorable characters includes:


Stephano: A supposedly gay statue made by arabs who mostly yells at PewDiePie (as any even remotely intelligent person who listens to him screaming for half a minute would do) except when it makes hints or shouts at PewDiePie when he misses something important while playing the game, instead of simply telling him the truth of how severely unfunny he is.

Barrels: Probably the most famous character in his series (likely thanks to his fans' tendency to refer to anyone who understands why PewDiePie is not funny as "BARRELS"), these things are apparently the evil masterminds behind everything bad that happens to PewDiePie, hence whenever the rambling retard spots a barrel in any game he will immediately scream like the insufferable little faggot he is as loud as he can, because his so-called "commentary" just wasn't enough of an annoyingly unfunny trainwreck already. Oh, and he calls his haters, well... barrels. (Now we know where this faggotry came from.)

Happy Wheels characters: Whenever PewDiePie makes a new Happy Wheels video he just loves to give voice-overs to the characters he plays as, because isn't that exactly what a slapstick game based entirely around physical comedy was missing? Dialogue that is comprised of constantly recycled catchphrases that no one with an I.Q. over 17 would mistake as even an attempt as actual comedy? Some of his famous characters are the irresponsible dad and his son where he voices both of them at the same time. Look up any PewDiePie fan forum and you're likely to find some of the most beloved quotes.

Mr. Chair: The dumbest and most retarded character ever created (yes, even by the standards of this douche-horse). Whenever he sees a chair, he gets all excited because his microcock needs a fuckbuddy and thus he names it Mr. Chair. Get it? It's funny because it's a chair! All hail the comedic gem that is PewDiePie! Chairs also seem to "help" him in-game, seeing as whenever a monster chases him he throws the chair at the monster while saying "Chair mode activated". No, we're not making this up. He really is that fucking retarded.

Do I look kawaii yet?

Piggeh: A mutilated secks-crazy pig carcass PewDiePie discovered in Amnesia. Mostly talks and acts like a nigger cracking overdone "dirty" jokes and genital references. Using hilarious catchphrases such as "Yiyyyeh" and "I'm pumped" while probably hoping that its miserable swiny life would come to an end

Slender Man: Slenderman is a myth in which PewDiePie believes, so when he did a play-through of every 13-year-old YouTube-dwelling moron's nightmare Slender, he got so terrified that now, whenever he sees someone wearing a black suit and is bald, he calls him "Slendy" (look attorrent his mad father's play-through for moar info. This would be the same faggot that made Slender Man a forced meme and promptly ruined everything for everyone.)

Cry: Not a character he created, but his buttbuddy that appears in his videos when the unfunny needs crankin'. Cry is a fame leech that only played with PewDiePie so he can get more subscribers and thus get more money. (He's a Jew, what a surprise... no wonder he chose him as his friend.) HoweverThankfully, PewDiePie doesn't know because he has so much cum within his brain that he can't see the truth. He also seems to like playing as little girls or play games that contain little girls. Pewdie fans generally imagine Pewdiepie and Cry engaging in intimate acts together, because all "pewdiecry" fangirls are a bunch of delusional 16 year olds.


2014 UPDATE: PewDiePie no longer uses any of these "funny" characters because he realised that doing other shit would earn him more $$$. Even his good friend Cry has been abandoned for shitty Britfags, sluts and FUCKING SMOSH.

His girlfriend

His girlfriend.

While PewDiePie was walking down the street one day, he found a gay guy dressed as a woman, so he payed "her" his fans' money, and then after seeing his great wealth "she" offered to pretend to be his girlfriend. He has to pay "her" monthly because lolis don't come cheap, which is why he always begs for money from his fans, yep, that's right the donations are actually just sent to his "Girlfriend".

You get to see "her" playing with him sometimes in his videos, but just trust us this time: "she" JUST SUCKS. When PewDiePie introduced his girlfriend, a lot of fangirls got angry because "she" stole him from them. This just proves that PewDiePie's fans are nothing but a bunch of losers who will never get laid and are even worse than CoD kiddies (HOLY SHIT THE IMPOSSIBLE HAS BEEN DONE).


Note: her english sucks ass. and i mean a chinese lady speaks better english then her.

His porn habits

To no surprise this basement dweller likes to watch porn. But where as most of them actually do anything besides watching porn, this is not the case with this faggot as most of his browsing history is porn.

Pewdiepie browses porn.png

creatives.livejasmin.com
xvideos.com
tube8.com
big tits amateur teen
xhamstercams.com
xhamster.com
porn.com
Mature Nude babes Having sex
youporn.com

perfect rolemodel
perfect rolemodel
perfect rolemodel
perfect rolemodel
perfect rolemodel
perfect rolemodel
perfect rolemodel

PewDiePie shows his true colors

In October 2012 some people posted a simple, blatant troll video about PewDiePie.

A typical fantard comment.

In a butthurt flurry, PewDiePie wrote a comment along the lines of "Oy Vey! The goy's hate and anti-semitism only bring me more shekels!" This inevitably caused a collective sore anus amongst his fans wondering why he said he was only in it for the money, and people began to downpour on PewDiePie troll videos white knighting anything and anybody who didn't suck his shriveled nerd cock.

The post itself
More proof that his fans cannot take any negative opinion about their god.

His bullshit apology video

Why he's full of shit

Previous Video  |  Next Video

Fast forward to 29 August 2014, PewDiePie has reached the 30M subscriber mark. How does he celebrate this? He lets down his fanbase. He says that the comments section is too messy and full of shit. So what does he do? He disables the comments section. Yep, he gives into the trolls and all sorts of people he mentioned, like the self-advertisers, aka attention whores.

He came out of the closet

Remember how you used to think that the Harlem Shake fad could not possibly get more embarrassingly stupid? Well, look what happened instead:

In February 2013 PewDiePie came out as a gay crossdresser, however, his video was instantly removed by his homophobic fanbase. The video starts out with him awkwardly walking around, the magnitude of which he feels is too great to put into words, so he expresses himself by wearing little girl's panties that he got in the mail from his fans, and then lives out his fantasy of dancing in a gay strip club for all the world to see. You can also get a good view of his small penis.

His Fanbase

A normal person's reaction to watching a PewDiePie video on YouTube.

His "fanbase" consists entirely of sheltered white knight children, or at least people who share their mentality. Somewhere along the search for an adult role model, these children's insatiable desire for homosexuality takes over and they're forced to find the only quasi-famous homosexual old enough to have a real job, but too socially inept to leave his mother's basement to get one. Since he spends all his time either fellating or fisting kids, or making funny faces while playing video games in order to lure them in. These children call themselves the "Bro Army," or "Bros," and are identified by the trail left behind of semen dripping from their sodomized kiddy anuses. Look for either that or any group of gaming-obsessed idiots exchanging unfunny catchphrases as if Z-grade comedy is their own, seperate language.

These self-proclaimed "Bros" are exactly like bronies, except these guys fap to PewDiePie while bronies fap to pony porn, and bronies at least have a very, very, very, VERY small chance of getting some. The "bros" won't even get a chance to touch their father's manboobs.

His fantards seem to call everyone who hates on PewDiePie a "barrel", intending for it to be their clever little in-joke and not realizing that it just makes them look like even more of an original fucktard and it makes people take them less seriously. That or they'll just accuse his haters of being jealous, which has the same effect as their "barrel" in-joke. What exactly you're supposed to be jealous of is very rarely clarified. Is it his ability to suck the comedy out of the room like a fucking vacuum cleaner? Is it the fact that the haters will never get as famous as him, i.e. obtain a fanbase that contains nothing aside from easily amused kids and teens? Is it the fact that he's got a girlfriend and the haters don't? Well no, because who would want to date anyone who finds loud Happy Wheels commentaries for 70 fucking videos amusing?

It's a good thing he has this massive, blindly defensive following, though, because that means he can conveniently send an army of illiterate, prepubescent fucktards to defend him whenever someone calls him out on his bullshit, so that he won't actually go as far as to grow an actual set of testicles and learn to accept criticism.


1 hour of fucking torture.

Trolling his Fanbase


Trolling PewDiePie's Fantards

His fanbase in a nutshell

Proof the Bro Army don't watch the video before commenting on it (look at the like/dislike ratio)

Previous Video  |  Next Video

Types of fans includes:

The list goes on...Oh, and if you're wondering how to troll his fans, just pick on them in general, but the 10-13 year old fans will get their Dicks all strung up if you mention that he copies other users in humor (there's loads of faggotry about this, try to phase out the virgin guy's talking when watching), is in fact Pedobear, or Gay (spam R34 if they deny).

And in case you want to witness the faggotry yourself, Here's his forum.

His Cancerous "Fabulous" Song

In December 13th 2014, the overrated faggot enslaved some asshole named Roomie to do a shitty montage song. In this video, PewDiePussy is cumfirmed to be a homosexual that even his feminazi friend is less lesbian. Later in 2015, the morbidly obese neckbeards at Roblox decided to force you to listen to this cancer just to get a terribly designed egg.

Fanart Gallery

PewDiePie About missing Pics


Examples of this faggotry

Atomic.gif Warning!
Viewing these videos might give you aids, turn you into a retard and moar etc.
Enjoy the ear rape

Previous Video  |  Next Video


See Also

External Links


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PewDiePie is part of a series on

Whores

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PewDiePie is part of a series on

Homosexual Deviants

Visit the Faggotry Portal for complete coverage.

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PewDiePie is part of a series on

YouTube

Visit the YouTube Portal for complete coverage.

Let's Players

PewDiePie
is part of a series on
Let's Players

Featured article January 19 & 20, 2013
Preceded by
Bullet to the Head of the NRA
PewDiePie Succeeded by
Martin Luther King, Jr.
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