Planet of the Apes

From Encyclopedia Dramatica
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius. Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius. Dr. Zaius, Dr. Zaius, Ohhhh, Dr. Zaius!
Plot synopsis.

Chimpout: The Movie, also known as The Planet Of The Niggers is another shitty dystopian science fiction trilogy blown out of proportion, even though the timeline makes no sense at all to anyone but a fanboy, thus the trilogy has became very popular among geeks and nerds alike. Back in the '60s, some queer French faggot called Pierre Boulle wrote a science fiction novel called La Planète des Singes about a bunch of monkeys taking over the Earth. This retarded premise proved so popular that it spawned a whole movie franchise until Tim Burton killed it with his failure of a reboot. This Cold-War-era series of shit films were supposed to be forgotten forever, until massive chimpouts all over the world culminating in the martyrdom of "Caesar" forced the revival of the franchise once again as a foreboding warning to humankind.

Previous Sequels, Reboots and Remakes

Beneath the Planet of The Apes

Another unneeded sequel involving mutated Americunts and everyone dying.

Escape from the Planet of the Apes

Three chimpanzee apes from the first movie apparently end up going inside the spacecraft from the second movie to get it working again so they could escape their deaths but end up back in time through the shockwave of the doomsday device. Long story short; they go back in time and end up with everyone wanting them dead.

The Planet Of The Apes (Burton Version)

A shitty imitation of the original starring Marky Mark that has no purpose at all and nothing to do with any of the other movies that was just made to take your jewgolds. It was thought that this shit film is the final nail in the coffin for the Planet of the Apes franchise, but turned out, we were wrong.

Rise of the Planet of The Apes

Screencap from the movie.

Wait, are you actually looking for the Ferguson Riots?

A remake and a reboot titled because since Christopher Nolan spunked his oily load all over Batman, every movie has to have the word 'rise' or 'rises' in the title... though it turned out to be a fucking prophecy on the impending development of the Ape Rebellion. You see, the protagonist chimp, Caesar, was born intelligent, but went all violent on a neighbour to protect some white friend with Alzheimers, and of course was sent to animal shelter. Of course, Caesar dindu nuffins, so he took over the local ape gang, figured out how to escape and stole IQ-enhancing viruses from Big Pharma which he sprayed upon all the apes in the shelter to make them rebel and spread their Freedom all over San Francisco, which should have been more accurately named "Ferguson".

Dawn of the Planet of The Apes

Or more known in the modern consciousness as The Great Baltimore Riots of 2015. Monkeys look fake. This time, Simian Flu pwned 90% of the Human population except for a minority of people immune to the virus, while in the forests the Apes who have just built The Projects are on the verge of political conflict between Caesar (who loves humans) and Koba (who wants to holocaust all remaining humans because they tortured him). Dawn is more known for featuring in the mobile game Plague Inc to attract furries with the fantasy of using a virus to destroy the human race and replace them with intelligent apes.

The rest of the movies

The shitsticks who made the modern versions of rise of the planet of the Negros are making another sequeal , yes you heard me , another fucking sequel , this time called War of planet of the fucktarded Monkeys. Set to be released around 2017 now with more fake monkeys and shit.