Portal:Truth/Featured Article/Archive

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February 2017

Full Disclosure: Conspiracy Theory
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There is a secret cabal whose only design is to keep you from getting laid. There are forces aligning against your attempts to make money. Secret societies are lining up and scheming just so that you will never be successful. Mysterious factions gather under the full moon, attempting to bring the downfall of the world, just so that you will never lose weight, be attractive, or stop smelling like cheese. All of these things, these Conspiracy Theories, are the average internet slob’s excuse as to why he or she has become and remains such a goddamned loser.

February 2016

Full Disclosure: Nietzsche
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Friedrich NietzscheFedora icon.png was a poor, crippled, crazy bastard of a philosopher who spent his entire life trying to prove to the masses that God is dead, that we can all rise to the level of the Übermensch, that women are useless, and that the Christians were forcing us all to become pussies. He wrote countless undecipherable books and convinced most people he was insane before actually obliging them. He spent the last ten years of his life in bed shitting himself and rambling incoherently before God decided to send him down to hell. Apparently, a bunch of fucking retards think Nietzsche is the most important thinker of the 19th Century, and helped carve Western Philosophy. However true this is, Nietzsche was a fag who deserved death because he couldn't write or think. Some morons think the term "Ubermensch" was hijacked by Adolf Hitler, but this was for the lulz—Nietzsche hated Jews but didn't have the balls to admit it. Well... now humanity knows what happens when some bitchmade cracker takes metaphorical beliefs literally.

June 2015

Full Disclosure: Francis E. Dec, Esq.
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Francis E. Dec, Esq., 29 Maple Avenue, Hempstead New York, was probably best known for his accurate predictions of the then coming (and now status quo) "Worldwide Mad Deadly Communist Gangster Computer God".

A respectable lawyer, Dec was "disbarred" by the corrupted legal system of New York on fabricated fraud charges in 1956. Framing innocent people is simply standard business practices for the deadly trick gangster government, but they would not get away with it on this man, he had stared into the eyesight televisions of the lifelong sworn conspirators of the deadly sneak puppet gangster communist Frankenstein earphone radio slave government, and immediately knew the truth, and was ultimately murdered for spreading this truth.

June 2014

Full Disclosure: The Aztecs
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The Aztecs originally came from a town called Atzlan (City of the telescopic crane) which they had to leave because of their insane religious beliefs, a fact that makes em the 1st group of perverted religious deviants to roam the Americas. Kicked out of their Hometown, they walked toward the east, feeding on reptiles, grass, small children and other shit, but finally they managed to establish a shining new city… on a snake-infested, barren island in a swamp, surrounded by hostile tribes. But things went well, and after a century of skillful diplomacy they managed to build a great and proud society, mainly based on murder, cannibalism, war, incest and human sacrifice, much like present day Texas.

March 2014

Full Disclosure: The Dickriders

The Dickriders are a super-team of extremist Coughlan fanboys that have taken faggotry to a new level. Anybody that dares criticize their hero will certainly enjoy a series of intellectual comments and video responses from these sad and pathetic loser assholes that come out of the woodwork to throw in their two cents and tell you to STFU.

November 2013

Full Disclosure: Area 51

Area 51 is an imaginary air base in Nevada which definitely doesn't exist. It is not the government's holding area for technology not thought to be made by man, nor is it the center for the procurement and research into such technology. The moon landing was not filmed there, despite the overlays of terrain that would point to the contrary, nor have aliens ever had anything to do with anything there, despite the thousands of statements claiming otherwise. The government has told us time and time again that there is no base out there, yet still those pesky hillbillies (and certainly not some of the most respected scientists, engineers, and military personnel in the world) keep thinking that there is something going on. Your government would never lie to you.

August 2013

Full Disclosure: Chilean Mole People
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The August, 2010 an accident at the San José Mine in Copiapó in the deserts of northern Chile occurred when a bunch of human garbage were ceremoniously shoved deep within the earth to work like grubby dwarves for a globalist gold and copper conglomerate. A collapse occurred, trapping around sixty people underground, but half of them were close enough to the surface to be quickly rescued. Counting themselves lucky, the rescuers packed up their shit and went home, figuring that the other 33 miners trapped beneath the surface were worm food. What happened next made the world shit bricks; gold bricks. Or so they would have you believe!

June 2013

Full Disclosure: Alien
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Throughout the modern era, Aliens have been depicted as brutal, uncivilized, murderous, raping molluscs that steal satellites for no reason. But in reality, most of them are actually perfectly civilized rapists who genuinely care about their victims and are masters in the art of anal telekinesis. And even though most of them are sex offenders, as records show that 99.99% of anal rape crimes committed in Texas are done by extraterrestrial beings, that doesn't mean that they're all bad.