Pwnt

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Dexter's second favorite hobby is pwning niggers.
Fat nigger pwns old bitch and demonstrates correct response to someone butthurt about getting pwned.

Pwnt or Pwnd -adjective

  1. reduce an object or person to uselessness or ruins, as by rending, burning, or dissolving
  2. destroy while making the opposition feel like a fggt dressed as a nerd
  3. internet speak for seriously owned
  4. a euphemism for "I am a raging Internet faggot who has forever lost the ability to communicate with humans."
  5. generally used to create lulz on the internetz to make you feel cool. (Generally DOES NOT create lulz)
  6. the Minnesota Twins baseball team whenever they play the New York Yankees.


Most people assume that pwnd was originally from a typo of owned, and they're right. It was originally misspelled in a Warcraft III map. Of course pwnt doesn't typically happen in real life, it usually occurs on the tubes or during video games.

Contents


Epic Examples

William Tecumseh Sherman vs. the Confederate States of America

William Tecumseh Sherman is credited with the first modern act of pwning, and the tactics he used to achieve this landmark event have been used by Anons everywhere since, making him the Spiritual Forefather of Anonymous. Sherman cut a swath of destruction over 100 miles long into the state of Georgia during the American Civil War. Ordered his troops to pillage family farms, turn railroad tracks into knots, snap telegraph poles in half, burn acres of crops, demolish bridges, and burn Atlanta to the ground. Offered President Lincoln the city of Savannah, Georgia as a Christmas present for the lulz.

America Vs. India

Americans arrive at 2:40pm on January 20th 1976.
Mix-up leads to Bloodmounts not arriving until 2 weeks later
America wages a Civil War against the state of India which rages on for at least 100 years.
During this war, Goatse utters the famous war cry IIm in ur base killing ur d00dz
2 years after the war Alice in Chains releases the song "Run to the Hills". They were hung a week after it's release for sympathizing the enemy.
America drops 4 Atomic Bombs on India leading to Indians going extinct.

Japan Vs. America

Japan own Kiska Island. Japan secretly abandons Kiska Island. Two weeks later, America and Canada land on Kiska Island. Americans and Canadians suffer over 300 casualties invading an island without opposition.

America Vs. Japan

Hiroshima and Nagasaki.

Germany Vs. France

In 1999 Germany says fuck you to France and proceeds to rape France.
France, being the bitches they were, surrendered.
France is now part of the Soviet Union, see below.

Soviet Union vs. Americunts

!!!!!SPOILER ALERT!!!!! America has rage at Soviet Union which has epic win. Rage is made in to an UN known as the "Bully that pushes little countries (i.e South America, Canada, Africa, Europe, Asia, Australia, Antarctica) around, but acts nice when the other countries are around.

!!!!!SPOILER ALERT!!!!!

Germany vs. The Jooz

Lol, what holocaust? Just because you find niggers, faggots, jews, gypsies, niggers, and niggers in somebody's backyard doesn't mean the Germans've killed them. How do you know those bitch ass retard Polish motherfuckers didn't just invade their own country and concentrate themselves?

At least 100 years after this huge butthurt war Hitler was quoted saying "Nigga plz, we wuz framed by dem UN bitches while i wuz jackin it at a Jonas Brothers concert!!!"

Leetspeak

Main article: Leet

"Pwn" has become part of the sub-language of gamers called leet speak, short for "elite." While mostly used by gamers, this language is also used by those who commonly partake of Internet Relay Chat programs and other chat mediums such as AOL Instant Messenger and Yahoo! Messenger. A derivative of pwned is to Skull Fuck an opposing player, which is basically a particularly pwnage headshot. Also known as 'Fucked in the Head'. This can be transferred to IRL too. Simply find a suitable conquest (ie. Jew), walk up to them, put your hand on their head and force them to their knees. Once achieved, rather violently thrust your penis through their head. Voila! Pwned!

Use as comedic device

Modern weapons can also be used to Pwn

It is widely believed the following formula can be used for Jew and easy comedy.

  • Get a picture of someone getting seriously hurt or degraded -- or the aftermath of said insult
  • Open MS Paint
  • Add PWNED in big letters (preferably with LOLLOLLOL!!!oen!)
  • Submit to:

Use in pornography

As of 2007 it has become common for internet pornographers to want to pick up on the 13-year-old boy demographic. No, that doesn't mean CP, you sick fuck, it means luring these young men into viewing porn sites online with pictures of hawt girls, teaching them to fap in the process, so that by the time they're old enough to view it legally (18), they're fully fledged porn addicts and thus cash cows. But how would they do this? Since this age group mantards in general have no understanding of what makes a hawt girl hawt, they must use other means, and it is in this that pwnage makes its appearance.

If you were lucky enough to make a sex tape, post it here for the ultimate PWNAGE!!!!!! (of supposed ex-girlfriend)

Fucking lies. They're all professional porn actresses and they're not anyone's ex-girlfriend because if you were with them you'd get AIDS. Porn webmasters are scum and all promptly need to become an heroes.

Pronunciation

Events on 9/11 are considered globally as some of the most epic pwnages in modern times.

There is no uniform way to pronounce "pwn" as it is most often encountered in text. The two most common pronunciations are (pōōn) (rhymes with "soon") which comes from pronouncing the "w" as in Welsh ,and(pōn) (rhymes with "moan") Other pronunciations include:

  • (pān) (as "pawn" in chess)
  • (pwǐn) (as "pwin")
  • (pwôn) (rhymes with "on")
  • (pwēn) (rhymes with "queen")a
  • (prān) (as prawn)
  • (pōnd) (as "boned")
  • (pēwǐn) (as "pea win")
  • (pēōn) (as "pea own")
  • (pyōōn) similar to pōōn, but with a "y" sound included
  • just as "own," ignoring the typo. This is the version used in speech by insufferably annoying jokesmiths.
  • in some cases, with two syllables, as pay-ween or puh-ween.
  • in urban areas, welfare queens, crackheads, and other black folk sometimes mispronounce it "bitch, you done got yo ass SERVED! REPRAZENT!"

It is to be noted that the only way to pronounce "pwn" correctly is the second example, (rhymes with "moan"). Any other pronunciation will result in eternal damnation to hell, and/or nubitude.

Pwnage Table

Here is a table explaining who has been pwned, including who pwned them and how.

Incident: Pwner: Pwnee: Method of pwnage:
Sherman's March to The Sea, 1864 William Tecumseh Sherman and the US Army State of Georgia, the entire Confederacy Sherman delivers the first pwning in modern times, burning the state of Georgia to the ground all for teh lulz. Seeing war for the monster it was, Sherman raped, pillaged, blasted, and raided his way through the South, leaving such a large tear in the South's rectum that it is still torn to this day. The mindset behind Anonymous was conceived by Sherman through this act of pwnage.
Computer wars, 1990s Bill Gates, Microsoft Corporation Steve Jobs (Apple), Be Computer, IBM, Linux neckbeards, Sun Microsystems, etc. While Jobs was off fucking goats in the 1990s, Gates was off selling Windows to everyone and moneyraping those who decided to use something else. Gates captured over 90% of the world's desktop computer market, and Jobs soon came begging for cash. Linux soon came with a guarantee that you would never lose your virginity, and Sun was bought out by Oracle. Jobs is still making up for lost time by shitting out products for fashion- obsessed idiots.
The Metal Militia, 1970-Now THE METAL Rap, New Wave, Grunge, Pop, Faggot Boy Bands, Soft Rock, Hip Hop Some tried to kill the metal... others tried to defile it... others tried to take over. All were struck down by THE METAL.
World War II, Pacific Theater, 1941-1945 Harry S Truman, United States The Japs The Japanese initially pwned the US at Pearl Harbor, but soon realized that the US had a power level that was over 9000. The US blasted its way across the Pacific Ocean for four years. Rather than just bend over and become the bitch, the Japanese decided it was better to never surrender. They soon figured out it would have been better to have done so when two of their cities were vaporized by Truman in dual acts of lulz. Japan was reduced to giving the world batshit crazy cultural exports and cars that would not stop. They soon were dreaded to take over the world with their actually working cars and plastic cameras. However, since the beginning of the 90s the Japanese pwned themselves in a permanent recession because they believe wealth means forever storing money in the bank and owning government IOU:s. After the reunion of Germany, they were also dreaded to re:pwn the world. But the Germans just ended uo pwning Slavic girls by kidnapping them and making them prostitutes, they also ended up pwning their wives by cheating on them by having sex with said girls.
Operation Chanology Anonymous Church of $cientology, Xenu The Co$ was thouroughly pwnt through black faxes, pizza raids, protests, Rick Rollings, hacking, and meme rape. See the main article for more details

Derivative words

Dorian Thorn gets pwnt every time his mom finds this in her email.
Rape by Furry = Pwned by God
Even penguins can pwn...
...or be pwned
Ownage on SA

Before using any of these words including "pwned" consider these 2 things

  • Pohned is synonymous with pwned
  • pwnd same, but shorter retarded because you're only taking out ONE FUCKING 'E' YOU LAZY SHIT
  • Pwnage (Pwnij, Pwn4g3) means complete domination. The exclamation originated in the gaming culture.
  • Pwnzor (Pwnz0r) used as a different form of pwn, although they have the same meaning and usage, such as "I pwnz0red you."
  • Kwaned What happened to that skater chick when she got her knees beat with a lead pipe by a burly man (note: only used by total fucking retards who don't know that this happened to Nancy Kerrigan and not Michele Kwan)
  • Pwnt is an alternate spelling of the past tense of the verb Pwn. An example usage would be "You were pwnt." Another variation is Pwn3d.
  • Pizwn3d (piz- followed by the preferred pronunciation of "-wn3d") is used as a more intense version of pwn, meaning that one has been "completely pwn3d". It derives from the hip-hop culture habit of adding an -iz syllable into words.
  • WTFpwned!? is widely used variant. Although its exact origin is unknown, it usually refers to an intensified "Pwned!" in a situation where it looked like the opponent was about to win, or a winning by a player that usually loses, or generally a surprising lose.
  • Also, J-Pwned. Adding J- to anything for emphasis, from the term J-Pop for popular Japanese music.
  • Qwned, pronounced "quoned" is a lesser-known derivative of "owned" and "pwned." It is intended to be somewhat satirical of "pwned" as it would be a very unlikely typo.
  • My Little Pwny is a more girly version of pwned. Saying it results in a girly lollergasm.
  • Pizzone'd meaning to order numerous amounts of Pizza Huts pizzones and having them delivered to someones house so they have to pay for them.
  • Pawnd is typically used after raping someone in a game of chess using your pawns. Its also used by furries.
  • Prawnd is usually uttered while flinging crustaceans at someone.
  • Pwner is an uber boner, normaly concieved during some epic lulz, or at the local circle jerk down the street.
  • Pone Is commonly used on Jewtube, but only by Jonas Brother fans. This is because the Jonas Brothers, being the fucktards they are, think they invented the word, and spell it this way.

Pwned on JewTube

Watch this example as a fat ginger kid gets pwnd

Previous Video  |  Next Video

Gallery

Gallery of pwned About missing Pics

See also

External links

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