Realdoll

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She has her "come hither" face off.

They say that the porn industry is a leader in technological innovation. A bold and perverse tribute to this statement is the Realdoll, a corpse-like android invented purely to give grubby shut-ins some late-nite company. Although there is only one company that manufactures the actual Realdoll, the term encompasses all realistic sex-dolls. For a modest price, you can receive a life-long companion that looks like it was just scooped from a casket and exudes an alluring musky fragrance of outgassing latex.

Anatomy of a Realdoll

This one is in severe need of maintenance.

Realdolls have steel skeletons and silicon skin, much as biological humans do. While they are similar in height to the average woman, they are usually equipped with tits from as big as watermelons to as small as mosquito bites. The weights of the dolls also border on the extremes; the Amy Winehouse and Anna Nicole Smith models are among the most popular. Feminists claim that the manufacturers of the dolls are guilty of perpetuating unrealistic views of the female body, but nobody listens to feminists.

Features and Accessories

Realdoll creators also cater to the lucrative infant market.

Some Realdoll owners just need to have that extra patch of pubic hair for their robot lover. Manufacturers of the glorified fleshlight have taken note of this and offer to customize dolls for a sizable fee. Although Realdolls can be purchased for only $6,500 without any additional accessories, extra customizations can bring the price to $10,000 or higher. Sadly, the dolls come without an internal heater for the time being, which means that the Realdolls feel as corpse-like as they look. TOW suggests that people heat their Realdolls with electric blankets or hot baths. Prospective doll buyers should take this advice; Wikipedia editors are probably well-versed on these matters. Another accessory that has yet to be developed is a voice-box. If you purchase a Realdoll, you'll find that it can't yet whisper sweet nothings into your ear. However, real men don't care about this, as they know that women shouldn't be allowed to speak anyway. Rumor has it that sex doll manufacturers are developing a female doll with multiple selectable personalities, including one that doesn't consent to sex. News of this caused a massive shitstorm within the moralfag community that continues to rage on today. Of course, the porn industry always wins wars of morality, and soon you will be able to buy your very own rape victim!

Falling in Love

A realdoll owner berates his wife for being unable to hold a vacuum handle.

Similar to pillow-humping dogs, some Realdoll owners can't tell the difference between real women and their inanimate companions and thus fall in love with their Realdolls. This confusion may be due to the fact that these lonely, pasty creatures haven't had much contact with actual females. Oblivious to the fact that loving something that can't cook, clean, or bear children is pointless, Realdoll lovers romance their silicone babes as only desperate men can. Forums, documentaries, and television specials document this bizarre phenomenon and often make the amateur's mistake of giving the doll-lovers a 'human' dimension. The people who love these dolls out of desperation either have ridiculously high standards or are unaware of the fact that actual, living fat chicks will date even the most troll-like of basement-dwellers as long as they receive enough attention. Regardless of the motives behind treating a Realdoll like a wife, lovers of the dolls die with nothing but polyester mannequins and cats to keep them company.

A Video About these Ronery People


Gallery

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Known users

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