Rubén Puig Lecegui

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Police.gif Remember kids - true Pokémon masters don't shit in hotel corridors!
Rubén in happier times, posing with another trainer and three furfags.
Words of a champion.

The tale of Rubén Puig Lecegui (moar liek Pooben Pooey Lecegui, amirite?) and his fall from grace is a tragic story about what happens when the pressures of the world of championship level Pokémon battling just gets too much for a mortal man to bear.

Once the darling of the respected and prestigious Pokémon championship circuit and two-time winner of the Pokémon Masters Division, like so many sporting legends before him, Lecegui threw it all away. Not for drugs or women or anything like that, but for the simple pleasure of defecating the corridor of a Holiday Inn and then throwing it at people.

Shit Goes Down

Go! Muk!
Pokémon professors were surprised by the absense of Poochyena on Rubén's team.

The foul business started on the evening of March 3rd 2012, following an action-packed day of battling at the UK Pokémon Video Game Championships which, this year were being held in Birmingham - a somewhat fitting location, given the events that transpired, as anybody who's ever had the misfortune of visiting Birmingham will no doubt tell you.

The trainers (as well as their parents and any pedophiles that had been successful in their pursuit of supple young boys that day) had retired to their hotel rooms for the night, when they were suddenly and unexpectedly awoken by 20-year-old Lecegui and his fellow members of the Spanish team...

After 30-40mins in my room relaxing with a quick snooze I awoke to the sound of banging coming from down the hall from where the 'Spanish Team' were staying in.

It seems that at some point after they had turned up and when we went to Wetherspoons the Spaniards had decided to have a 'poo' fight in the corridor and this had upset the staff and several guests (naturally) at the hotel enough to call the police and have them leave.


—The testimony of one of the trainers in attendance

According to several eyewitness acounts, Lecegui and members of his team placed their own feces in the hallway of the hotel they and other Pokémon players were staying at.



Wow, someone who liked Pokemon turned out to have no idea of what is socially acceptable, what a surprise.



Shit Gets Real

A disgraced Lecegui contemplates a bleak future ahead of him, filled with such vices as girlfriends, socializing and growing up.
Understandably upset by his disqualification, Rubén took to the Smogon forums to put forward his own statement.

The Pokémon Company International expects its players to maintain high standards of behaviour conducive to the family-friendly environment that we foster. The Pokémon Company International conducts full investigations into any matters where we believe that a player has failed to maintain these standards, and take appropriate action when necessary. In this case, we have found that unacceptable behaviour did take place, and have taken the appropriate steps in response.


—Dave Schwimmer, Pokémon organised play manager and Ross from Friends.

Nintendo took a dim view of Lecegui's shitty Spanish shenanigans and were quick to denounce this shamefur dispray, stripping him of his title and crowning the event's runner up the new champion, leaving Lecegui's otherwise promising career as a Pokémon master in tatters.

See Also

External Links

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