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Steve Ballmer

From Encyclopedia Dramatica

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Ballmer in his natural habitat
This is the guy who is in charge of Microsoft now
This is what keeps Ballmer alive

Steve Ballmer belongs to a rare breed of monkey that feeds on human genital wart. He was formerly the Filthy Jew In Charge of Microsoft after Bill Gates decided to stay home and play Halo 3.

In much the same way that Robert Gallo identified HIV-1, the virus that causes AIDS, Steve Ballmer was one of the first to identify the hacker operating system Lunix as a cancer. [1]

Steve Ballmer wants to fucking kill Google. He is also responsible for making post-Bill-Gates Windows total horseshit.

Contents

Skillz

  • (Incorrectly) Forecasting release date of major software products
  • Kill human beings and small animals with chair-shots
  • Make Linux fanboys want to take a shower and start using Mac
  • Making Chink laborers make shitty computers.

Dance, Monkey Dance!

In 2001, Ballmer induced huge amount of lulz into the internets with his Monkey Dance in a developer conference shouting "Developers, Developers!" then collapsing into a seizure.

Developers!

Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers! Developers, developers, developers, developers!

Moar Youtube

GTFO

After Windows 8, Windows tablets, Windows phones, and Xbox One all ended in miserable business failure, shareholders have kicked Ballmer's fat monkey ass out of the CEO seat.

See Also


Microsoft.png Steve Ballmer
is part of a series on

Microsoft

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