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Superman
From Encyclopedia Dramatica
| Warning! Superman is a Communist! |
Superman is a name of a comic book character and a sex move. This is interesting as comic book fans have no sex. As always on ED, when there is more than one subject to be discussed in a single article, we discuss the subject that the majority of our readers will concern themselves with first. Every actor who's played Superman has been pwned in some way or another. Coincidence? You be the judge.
The character was born as Kal-El on the planet Krypton; upon Earth he became known as Clark Kent.
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Superman (The Character)
Superman is a character created by a couple of Nazis Jews to glorify the White race. IRL, Superman is Clark Kent, a mild-mannered newspaperman who looks exactly like Superman, except he wears glasses and a strap-on. In reality, he is Kal-El, the last survivor of some planet that blew up at least 100 years ago. Like many landed immigrants, he crashed on US-soil in a small metallic escape pod from space and forgot to apply for citizenship, but they still let him vote. His brothers are Sonny and Michael Corleone & Tom Hagen, as his father was Vito Corleone. The name Superman comes from the German word "Ubermenschen" which was a Nazi term for the SUPERMEN, or the Aryan race]]. Superman's arch rival is Lex Luthor, a bald American-CEO and all-round rich bastard; it's almost like Jesus Christ taking on Wall-Street. As with the character of Batman, Superman is to stupid to realize that simply killing his enemy would solve the problem.
Also, Superman is gay and has homosexual relationships with his editor, a photographer boy, his archenemy Lex Luthor, and Batman. Superman also has a line of softcore pr0n films that co-star Aquaman.
The most interesting period of Superman's comics was the late 1950s and early 1960s, when the Nazis had been replaced with writers who were taking illegal drugs long before it was popular. The editor, who took the most drugs of any of them, was infamous Julius Schwartz. Under his guidance, DC Comics constantly cranked out comics that were always either awesome, stupid, or awesomely stupid. Making fun of these comics has become popular recently on teh internets, especially on Superdickery.
A large number of the people Superman knows have the initials LL, which means that they are lesbians. Yes, LESBIANS. One example is Lois Lane, an attention whore who pretends to be Superman's girlfriend but in all probability wouldn't love him if he had no powers. In reality, she's having sex with her rival Lana Lang. Lex Luthor qualifies as a lesbian even though he is a gay-man as he secretly writes fanfic. Fanfic lesbians know that Luthor is one of them. Since Smallville, lesbians have started have been obsessed with Luthor having sex with Superman in the ass.
Superman (The Sex Move)
The Superman is a sex move where you fuck a girl and then throw her out of a window; Quasidan tried posting this on Wikipedia and it got deleted faster than a speeding bullet.
Superman in Second Life
Gene Turnbow, who plays Second Life, believes he is Superman and has adopted the identity of Kal El.
Rule 63'd
The Death and Return of Superman
Notes
- Lesbian comic book readers have less sex than male comic book readers.
- The aforementioned point is retarded, negative numbers are not real numbers.
- Technically the aforementioned point is true as having negative amounts of sex results in other people around you having sex with anyone you try to approach.
- The aforementioned point is pointless.
- The aforementioned points are both valid as negative sexual numbers always leave ALL lesbians in a constant state of asking for it. Nature abhors a vacuum and like a black hole of cock this leaves them in a constant state of waiting to be raped.
- Lesbian comic book readers spread their anti-male propaganda on Yahoo role playing chat rooms.
Gallery
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Also see
| Featured article December 4, 2005 | ||
| Preceded by Vampire | Smallville | Succeeded by George Bush doesn't care about black people |



