Teenage Kings of Werribee

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The Teenage Kings of Werribee are a gang of high school IRL trolls from Australia who raped a mentally-disabled 16 year old girl, set her hair on fire, urinated on her, video recorded it and cleverly uploaded it to their MySpace as Cunt: the movie. Less notably they also egged a taxi, bullied drunks, made chlorine bombs and dropped flares on a sleeping homeless person. They also ate all the soup that was supposed to last the Eskimos until 2007. Doing all this made them pretty cool guys.


The trolls had produced DVDs of the event which they sold for $5 from their cars, apparently thinking there was a mass market appeal for watching them rape and beat a retarded girl. In the film they refer to the girl only as The Victim and are noted for such quotes as What the fuck, she's the ugliest thing I've ever seen and Everyone's scared to go first, they don't want any diseases.

Apparently the girl met two of the boys online through a popular chatroom and agreed to meet one of them at the Werribee station but was then surrounded by the punks and taken to an isolated area near a river. However, by looking at the example in the background of the Today Tonight story it appeared to be a nineMSN chatroom. They probably left this fact out to avoid defamation but at Encyclopedia Dramatica nobody gives a shit.

The girl's father later appeared on television across Australia telling how his daughter's life had been ruined and that she could never hold her head up high.

Sadly, /b/ does not have a lot of money on hand and never received a copy when it was available, so the Teenage Kings are still waiting to break into the movie business. Sadly, there is still no full copy of the video known to exist on the internets but you can view some slightly graphic moments in the Today Tonight Story.

It is known that one student was expelled from Werribee Secondary College and that the video was available at Kardinia International College and Mary MacKillop College. The future of these fucktarded 13 year old boys is currently pending but it is suspected they can look forward to many years of forced goatseation in prison.

Retard Semantics

The victim, whose real name is allegedly Freya, has been downgraded from "intellectually disabled" to "developmentally delayed." In other words, Freya was actually upgraded from disabled to delayed.

Nonetheless, the dox of the rapists will still be available for your pleasure.

The participants dox (10th Anniversary Edition)

Despite the apparent fact that they are complete pricks doesn't stop them from having around 500 friends. Some weak attempts to raid their profile. I mean, three people could do more damage by flooding iichan in half an hour than anybody has ever done to these guys MySpace accounts.

Ross Tullio

Currently employed at Eascom Electrical Melbourne
36 Sabre Drv.
Port Melbourne,
Victoria 3207
T. 1300 327 266
F. (03) 9646 8819
[email protected]

Brent Tullio

His Instagram

His Linked-In with contacts to all his current employers

Daniel Porto

Some series of digits: 0422 577 828

Email: [email protected] [email protected]

"The only addiction worth having is perfection..." Daniel Porto, Facebook.

Stefan Angellini

His Twitter

His Linked-In

Brendon “Biccy Brendo” Thomas

His Facebook DELETED

Image of Brendon in Cunt: The Movie as he prepares to light the girl's hair on fire.

Josh 'Boofa' Radcliffe

Currently employed by Guilfoyle Wreckers Demolition
54 McArthurs Rd
Altona North VIC 3025
+61 3 9399 2222

Image of Josh Radcliffe a.k.a. Boofa in Cunt: The Movie (the one with black hair).

Jarred Magnabosco

His Twitter

His Myspace

Magnabosco F A.
Point Cook Rd Point Cook 3030
(03) 9395 1271

Image of Jarred Magnabosco in Cunt: The Movie; he was later interviewed by the media.

Dave O'Brien

His Linked-In. Owns his own carpentry business

His Myspace

Jail Time

Originally eight of them were charged with procuring sexual penetration by intimidation, manufacturing child pornography and assault. On April 5 2007 five of our heroes were charged with aggravated sexual assault. They were denied bail, in other words they are currently receiving forced goatseation from Bubba.

Due to them being underage at the time they undertook the brutal rape of a retard they will receive less jail time than an adult. However, due to the perpetrators being seven 17-year-olds and one 18-year-old at least one of them is going to IRL adult prison and should fear for his anus and all that is holy.

Sexual Crimes Squad detectives have charged seven 17-year-olds and one 18-year-old on summons over the DVD, which was circulated in the Werribee area, south west of Melbourne.


In a miraculous miscarriage of justice, the Teenage Kings of Werribee have escaped what would have been surefire surprise goatseation by Bubba. Instead, they received light sentences that include a year and a half of probation for all but three of them while two received year long probation sentences and one was able to get off completely. They will also be required to attend a counselling session for young sex offenders. It also means that trolling the fuck out of them is compulsory.

Oddly enough, none of these upstanding lads plead guilty to rape. Instead they plead guilty to the lesser offenses of "procuring sexual penetration by intimidation" "making child pornography" and assault.

Pwning Jackass


Soon after the existence of Cunt: The Movie was discovered several genius journalists realised the perpetrators may have been inspired by Jackass: The Movie as the two titles are similar and their content revolves around performing stupid stunts. A video can be seen here.

Johnny Knoxville was very inflamed by these accusations and denied them even though it is common knowledge that they are fact. He claimed that you could not compare getting run over by a bull to gang rape, which is completely untrue. It is also noteworthy that during his interview Knoxville was so drunk he was barely coherent, which explains it all really.

Even though there is no proof or credible information it is clear that Johnny Knoxville is solely responsible for Cunt: The Movie, in the same way that Marilyn Manson was responsible for Columbine, there's a pretty fucking obvious connection.

MySpace Pages

Surprisingly, these pages are updated regularly. It would seem that everybody in Australia can access the internet, no matter where they are. These kids have enough time on their hands to do this, even though they are busy making videos of them being assfucked by guys named Molly or Sally or some other feminine name given to guys who weigh 250lbs and eat V2 Rockets for breakfast.

Sample comment left on one of the pages

how the fuck could u do that to that chik who gives a fuck if shes retared i seriousli hope u do go to jail u sly lil shit... fuckin ure the retard not her and all those people that are cumin to get u im gnna help and seriousli boy u should believe it cuz u are fucking idiotic and stupid that i hope u get fuckin pissed on and i hope they burnn alll you hair off and the burn u not ure clothes ure skin cuz if i eva got hold of u and a lighter u would wish u were dead.. i would burn u al the way to hell and even then i wouldnt NOT stop u low life lil shit... GO TO HELL you ugly lil shit!!!!!!

from the gurl that wants to kill u!!!


Educational influences

Sources conclude to say that this school principal initially provoked the making of the film. Spouting such comments as "I dare ya" and "You'll get extra credit", he was confused when the film makers were charged with a crime. After this, he promptly shat himself and banned them all from his school IRL.


See also

External Links

Teenage Kings of Werribee
is part of a series on
Just another British fucking colony...


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Featured article October 29, 2006
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Mary Sue
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