The fieryangel

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Merge-arrows.gif It has been suggested that this article should be merged with Musik Fabrik. To find out moar, spam the goddamn talk page.


   
 
"Oh noze! I jus don no why Shankbone's gots tah picks on duh fiery angels! Wots he duns!? Dat Shankbonze dun been a jerk to dat po delicate gurlfreind o'mine, duh fiery angelz!"
 

 
 

—Traditional Hymn to the Fieryangel, sung at the Court of Jimbo the 1st

The fieryangel was the name of a contributor to the Wikipedia Review who just showed up and started ripping TOW new ones every day. No one seemed to know exactly who the fieryangel was and (s)he seemed to be a very mysterious charactor. As much as they searched and searched, nobody could really figure out who this mysterious person was...

But as many things are, the answer was really quite simple: the name contained the key to the mystery. You see, the name was the title of an opera

The Fiery Angel

or, a True Story in which is related of the Devil, not once but often appearing in the Image of a Spirit of Light to a Maiden and seducing her to Various and Many Sinful Deeds, of Ungodly Practices of Magic, Alchymy, Astrology, the Cabalistical Sciences and Necromancy, of the Trial of the Said Maiden under the Presidency of His Eminence the Archbishop of Trier, as well as of Encounters and Discourses with the Knight and thrice Doctor Agrippa of Nettesheim], and with Doctor Faustus, composed by an Eyewitness.:

This was to be oddly prophetic...

A little bedtime story (we hear that they like those a lot on TOW...)

Once upon a time, Last Thursday, there was a part of Wikipedia that nobody went to. This was because it was populated exclusively by screaming Opera Queens. Now, those of you who never go to the Opera probably don't know this, but Opera Queens are probably the bitchiest creatures on the face of this Earth. You take Joan Crawford, mix her with Bette Davis and add a swig of Rupaul and you still don't have any idea of how bitchy opera queens are.

These creatures jealously guarded the gates of any article that had anything to do with Opera, even though everybody knows that nobody likes Opera (except for Opera queens) and they had the sacred privilege of being able to decide what was important and what was not. They spent their days in happy bliss making royal pronouncements about the relative "importance" (or not) of Opera composers...But this peaceful bliss could not last...

Enter The fieryangel

It came to pass that two voyagers come across the Court of King Jimbo and decided to Spam the shit out of it. This was only right and good, since TOW only exists for spam and porn (don't worry, we'll get to the porn part soon enough). But since TOW is really a hypnotic drug, they were seduced by this happy kingdom and decided to be good citizens of the God King...This was to be a fatal mistake...

The fieryangel meets the Screaming Opera Queens

A TOW opera Queen discovers that the Sacred Word has been removed from the Sacred list!)

One day, the fieryangel came across the kingdom of screaming opera queens and saw a phrase that was so putrid, that he just had to change it. This phrase was the lavish spectacle of the intermedi. Now, if you're normal, you're probably thinking "So what. That phrase sucks. Get rid of it".

But you're forgetting that you don't ever, 'EVER', cross an opera queen, not if you want to live to tell about it. You don't touch ONE WORD of the SacredOpera Lists which must be kept pure for all eternity to forever honor the name of our King Jimbo the 1st, forever and ever AMEN. And if the phrase the lavish spectacle of the intermedi is ever removed from this list, the World shall disappear in a clap of thunder and everything shall vanish. You don't even think of redirecting these articles to something more interesting! Or you shall be forever destroyed and thrown into Hell for all eternity

So when the word lavish was removed, a catfight of biblical proportions was unleashed upon the fieryangel.

After a serious bout of scratching and clawing, peace once again reigned on the kingdom of the Opera Queens...but there was trouble on the horizon...:

Definitely NOT on the list of Major Opera Composers, but almost certainly on JzG's Ipod...

You see, the fieryangel had discovered the opera queens dirty secret: their sacred list was completely unsourced and totally failed NPOV and had to be baleeted. The Opera queens ran screaming to Arbcom and got the fieryangel bumped off the site...(well, not exactly, but that would have happened eventually because OPERA QUEENS NEVER FORGET!!!) However, it so happened that JzG made a rather stupid statement about what was not on his Ipod, which lead the Wikipedia Review to discover what was on his Ipod...

So the Fieryangel put on his boogie shoes and hightailed it out of there before the screaming opera queens could tear him apart. He went to the land where people wail and gnash their teeth and where the sacred Kool-aid may not be served!

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