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Powerword: Natalie N. Johnson) a 29 year-old self proclaimed "Slave to righteousness" is an unemployed devianTARTLET and Jesus Fangirl who was up until recently most popular for her Tekken fan art slashing various characters that would never actually look at each other, let alone have sex. However, like most TARTlets, she was not happy with 60,000 pageviews and decided that she needed to pull some stunt in order to maintain higher status. So like a true TARTlet she decided to have an epiphany(AKA: go batshit)., (
Xiao is under the impression ED and other patriotic trolls want her to stop doing what she's doing. That could not be further from the truth. She is a classic DA lulzcow staple and a good way to practice gettin' your troll on and learnin' to internet.
Xiao thinks that she has gathered so much attention from ED and TARTlets because she is against homosexuality. She apparently has not read ED's articles on faggotry-related subjects. Despite being an adult, Xiao does not realize that people react to how you say things and not just what you have to say. For someone who has made an E-career out of copyrighted material parodies, she does not understand how easily she lends herself to parody and flaming.
- 1 Quitting Lesbianism for Jeebus
- 2 Tekken fan art can't pray the gay away
- 3 Xiao-Feng-Fury Retaliates for GREAT JUSTICE!
- 4 Teh Secret!
- 5 A strong Christian response
- 6 War. War never changes.
- 7 Lulzy Journals
- 8 Xiao sees teh light
- 9 10/9/2008 Xiao gives up
- 10 10/18/2008 Xiao is risen
- 11 Look out Obama
- 12 Delete (almost) everything
- 13 Exodus; Xiao-Feng-Fury, has moved to (the nowadays dead) Sheezy "art"
- 14 Natalie hates black history month
- 15 teh return
- 16 See Also
- 17 External Links
Quitting Lesbianism for Jeebus
In a now-deleted journal entry, Xiao announced to the entire TARTlet community, for some reason, that she quit lesbianism in favor of banging her imaginary friend (no, really). This of course came to her in a mind blowing epiphany where she made a complete ass of herself at her local Dillards department store and admitting to playing with other kids' genitalia when she was just a wee child. Also in her startling epiphany she admitted to (OMFG) masturbation, which, according to her, is right up there on the immorality scale with animal rape. Reactions from the TARTlet community varied. Some ass-patting ensued from her longer time Christian fans applauding her courage, as well as some butthurt gayz retaliating. More importantly however, it became a source of much lulz in the form of devianTART drama, including pimping Jesus like a candy bar. (mmm, peanut-buttery goodness!).
And by "Quitting Lesbianism", she means "Stop thinking about kissibly soft girls unless my 'flesh rising up against me'" (also known as an "erection"). She did not breakup with her girlfriend nor did she regret having a relationship with a girl type. By her own E-admission, she never really did anything with a woman beyond the lesbo affair inside her head...or did she?
Tekken fan art can't pray the gay away
Xiao, like many people who can't accept it in themselves attempts to sublimate her gayness by rallying against it. Go onto deviantART and ask her about her lost years as an ugly lesbian. She will tell you stories of tears, voices in her head, the sweet embrace of a woman, and finally, her transformation into a asexual ugly weaboo.
—This girl thinks about fucking girls all the time.
Not only is homosexuality wrong, a choice, and something people can quit by switching over to Jesus, but it is actually Satan's tool. You see, Satan figured that if he could just get a man to stick his cock inside the ass of another man, then that would totally piss off God and give him many pwn points. As for lesbianism, well, Satan obviously just needed something to get off on, and a more radical way for feminists to express cock-hate. See? Total tools of teh Devil.
Xiao-Feng-Fury Retaliates for GREAT JUSTICE!
Unfortunately Xiao does not have a very original way of responding to the criticisms of her 'testimonial'. Like tracer TARTlet AniutqaDA she reverts to hiding comments that she doesn't have a snappy comeback to, such as a quote from the bible. She doesn't just hide criticisms however, she also hides her own comments when she looks back at them and realizes that they were completely idiotic, such as when her reply to one criticism was to post the lyrics to "Amazing Grace" (See screenshots plz). Aside from her arsenal of bible quotes and songs however, she also cites the rules of the playground that we all learned in Grade 2 (see moar screenshots plz.)
She also claims that a lot of people defend the gheyz because of the "homosexual agenda". While one would think this means Elton John and the like are sneaking into kids bedrooms at night and trying to turn them gay,, she defines the agenda as simply being gay. She spouts out the likes of "love the sinner, hate the sin" or "When did I ever say I hate homosexuals?" right before condemning the "lifestyle". She defends this by saying that an all-loving, all-forgiving God "doesn’t tolerate sin". Straight people also break God's rules, and Xiao admits this, but as more and more people support gays, she sticks with her Obsessionfixation on condemning the gheys.
For the continuously declining amount asslicking fundies and airheaded weeaboos supporting her, Xiao responds with quick messages such as "thx for your support! xD" or "Continue to pray for me, brethren" for any asspat they give to her. The opposition to Xiao's Bible-thumping rants outweighs the fantards, but Xiao will always continue preaching the truth.
Xiao's (Natalie) real life sister herself contacted an EDiot and let the awful truth be known. Xiao's gospel is built on a HOUSE OF LIEZZZZ! Her whole shtick is that she is a lesbian who WALKED AWAY (limping) from the sweet pleasure of bush and bewbs. However, as you can see in the quotes above she seems to be having a hard time using Jesus magic to keepkeeping the gay out.
Turns out its even more lulzy than that! She apparently never was a lesbo to begin with, she's pretending to be a ex-lesbo to inspire others to not be gay too! Her denial/non denial of truths/fantasy has created a Time paradox that could kill us all!
—Guess who's flesh and blood sister wrote this?
Natalie maintains her physical purity like a thief in the night. Despite what this virginal sexpert has to say about the inns and outs of homosexual sex (which is to say,a lot, go figure), she still takes the time to consent to and enjoy the following activities:
- Getting felt up at a video game convention by a stranger with a race based fetish. (Apparently, this stranger must have been Stuntman Mike from Death Proof.)
- Nursing a random tipo with her holy breasts that she met at a BUS PARKING LOT.
A strong Christian response
Xiao manages to piss off the Christian weeaboo community of deviantART as well. Click here for a delightful series of comic strips made by Christians embarrassed over Xiao's and voreaphile Stinky-05's antics http://ravenhaven.deviantart.com/gallery/#Sister-Christian-B-Bro.
Despite being a TARTlet for years, Xiao is apparently unaware of the concept of internet copyright, "fair use" and parody. Upon becoming dimly aware of this multi artist series (some of those artists including her own flesh and blood, lol), she posted a journal entry about how these comics are a copyright infringement on her weeaboo Tekken fanfiction "OC's".
Likening herself to the first Christians who were mistreated, beaten, and fed to lions, Xiao will not stand for this E-Persecution.
And ye shall be hated of all men for my name's sake: but he that shall endure unto the end, the same shall be saved. Mark 13:13, Luke 21:17"
There's no better way for me to say it.
The whole comic series mocks how I preach the word of God, it degrades my testimony and the character, "Sister Christian", is STRIKINGLY similar to my original character, XF, and her sidekick looks all to familiar to another OC I created named Jim Nasium. Jim's character design and parts of his personality are based on a friend of mine. Basically, I don't claim total ownership over that OC, but still...
See this isn't about the billions of dollars in E-Dollars, its about the integrity of her super deformed Weaboo OC. The Brother Bro and Sister Christian comics are brutal, hateful slandering of her OC. Here she compares them to killing 1/10th of your army for the lulz.
—This is what happens when idiots get "Word of the Day" Calendars
For all your fans out there who want to emulate Xiao's totally underivative, original style, just draw a young white woman. Be sure to make her plain and boring looking, someone who in a fair universe is "really funny" or "has a lot of personality". Color her a shade of anime brown that has yet to manifest in the human experience. Make sure to flatten out any curves or signs of a female form. Give a series of thick lines that resemble hair and you are done!
The next step is to depict her giving up neck to Eddy Gordo.
Xiao responded by revamping her avatar into an even more Caucasian...woman? Notice how the hair looks like some sort of slutty spreadeagled octopus, asking for it. That or every single male anime character from now back to Astro Boiiiiiiiiii. Maybe Xiao is embarrassed of being a black ghetto whore.
War. War never changes.
It's on now. The seals have been broken. The signs are nigh. ED is doomed, doooooooooooooomed.
Encyclopedia Dramatica can expect the full legal (Xiao Xeng) fury of someone who as an artist and a writer, is not quite talented enough to be writing Pheonix Wright fanfiction. That would require her to understand the concept of "Defamation of Character". Lol.
However, she does enjoy the attention she gets from this article.
Oh Noes…the Bitch is taking a Leave Of Absence! Xiao and her Homophobic Super Gay Hating Father are off to participate on yet another gay parade, by Shouting Bible scriptures at the God Forsaken Gays. Father and daughter being batshit and lulzy. "Now with the wisdumb of her homo-phobic father, ED’s days are numbered."
“My father is a minister who hates gays and has participated protesting in many gay parades. I am a reflection of him”, Xiao wrote this in one of her sister’s journals. Forcing her to hide her idiot embracing comments, after asking her to kindly stay the fuck off her journals. This says a lot for her father’s character. You could say she decimated her weaboo dad’s character.
Xiao-Feng-Fury makes journals on dA frequently, and said journals are often BAWWfests that result in drama. The following journals are only the cream of the crop.
The horror behind employment
With a fresh ED destroying victory under her belt, Xiao has decided she is E-accomplished enough to start turning down offers. Squatting at a San Antonio cafe with a laptop of course, an elderly woman happened to gaze upon her YouTube profile. This woman saw Xiao's anime art and instantly liked it, requesting a cosplay design. One would assume that Xiao thought that all people who are into cosplay are wards of the state and do not have any money to spend at all, yet ironically this lady was associated with big companies. Taking advantage of the woman's money offer, Xiao slyly offers her services.
After taking this woman's card, Xiao was excited, looking at resources including artists with skill. However, Xiao was cautious and did a little research into this woman and the organizations she associated herself with. These were:
- The International Council of Visitors: A group based on establishing world peace. Xiao found this unsettling, but was not too repulsed yet.
- Friendship Force: Similar to ICV, with their ultimate goal being bringing faiths together with hope of compromise. Xiao felt worse and considered it to be like a one world government.
- Sierra Club: Xiao just skimmed at first but then she gazed upon their human population policy in shock. She refuses to accept the concept of humans being killed for the sake of Earth. This was the worst of it all.
Jumping to superhuman conclusions, Xiao decided that this opportunity to develop professionally as an artist is too dangerous to the entire world to consider. She could never accept money from a women who represents Obama support, population control, and many other evils. You can view Xiao's brave avoidance of employment here, assuming of course, she did not make up the entire encounter. What kind of person considers her "works" to be professional? Also, at this point, she wants to be dead as soon as possible.
No More Subscription! TOO MUCH PORN!
Xiao-Feng-Fury, just like how she doesn't want to support human exterminators, had made the decision to stop subscribing to deviantART because of how much porn was being featured. She considers to stretch the limits of art. Although Natalie is once again standing by her ideals, she fails to realize there is little difference between posting weeaboo art on DA with a subscription and posting weeaboo art on dA without one.
Just about the only things she did with a subscription was have a fancier journal, polls about her love, and overall waste money on a shit site. In this crusade, she labels the porn as without artistic value due to being too hardcore, despite not being as bad as other pictures out there. Being a 24 year old virgin who has no sexual experience outside of Tekken tournaments, Natalie is uncomfortable naked pictures of people forcing themselves onto her screen causing her flesh to rise up.
To those who share her viewpoint and still waste their money on a subscription, Natalie told them to pray. Weakness in strunth, ignorance is bliss, Tekken OCs are art, BIG JC IS WATCHING JOO!
Xiao's willing to risk losing her job because she was angry at a shemale who worked at her job. Rather than establish a cold but professional relationship with said ladyman (and make fun of it online later, like most adults would), Xiao has taken it upon herself to not let this thing get away with whatever s/he is up to!
Xiao's magical homo spirit discernment powers are more common than one would think. They are known in the secular word as "Eyes" or "Ge-hay-dar" to Wiccan planeswalkers.
Just when you think Xiao is being a little less than rational, a 2nd voice from Heaven assures her, and you the reader, that this is the right, professional thing to do!
If one that is homosexual wants you to partake in his transgendered charade, then you, CHRISTIANS, are to say no. We are not to accept sin no matter who offers it, no matter how nice it may appear, not no time at all. There are people on this site that claims to be christian, or even are Christians, and they say that Jesus is their Lord, but within their journals you'll see stamps such as GAY PRIDE-I SUPPORT GAY RIGHTS-GAY RAINBOWS. I'm being straight up now, but whose God are you serving and who's bible are you reading?! You can't be serving Jesus if you support Homosexuality! Now please understand, we're not to HATE these individuals, we are to love them like a close loved one, but we ARE NOT to partake in their sins. Even if they beg and say pleeeeease support homosexuality, you rebuke them and say no. Not just homosexuality, but any sin. If any one is trying to have you to partake in some sort of sinful activity, JUST-SAY-NO! You may have to repent of your old habits and even some people that you call friends, HELLO, you may even have to LOSE YOUR JOB...but if that's what it take to prove your loyalty to God, then so be it. Now I don't know if I will have my job at Dillard's for long, but Lord willingly, I'll find out, but just take my situation to heart. This is the end times and things will get more bizarre than this, but God is Good. God is sooooooo good, He got this under control.
Be blessed, everyone.}
Xiao sees teh light
After getting stoned off her ass, Xiao had a vision. ED, 4chan, eBaum's, YTMND, Something Awful, the whole lot of them; are actually awesome. Just like the guy at the tournament who got a face full of her holy titties, Xiao is sucking down the life giving milk of the internet.
Just look at her latest masterwork and tell me she is not becoming one of us!
Xiao's backslide into sin continues. She's doing drugs! She's supporting abortion! She's robbing Dillards! She's kissing trannies! She's still playing Tekken! She's voting for Obama!
Her lust for women has reared its ugly head once again. Hand in bush, she lumbers towards Craigs List, where the following post was found.
Gays with nerdrage, or nerds with gayrage, can spread her carelessly posted email address [email protected] from sodomsite to E-Bathouse like a meth pipe!
10/9/2008 Xiao gives up
Xiao has been trolled into submission. Her faith has left her. She will be taking a "Leave of absence" where she will spend her time crusing kitty cat bars for a kind woman's touch.
In her admission of defeat, she promises to "Return when it is time to return" which according to our calculations, will be a few days before the rapture. If she returns beforehand, it will be an utter and complete waste.
The Bitch is taking a Leave Of Absence! Xiao and her Homophobic Super Gay Hating Father are off to participate on yet another gay parade, by Shouting Bible scriptures at the God Forsaken Gays. You can share your thoughts on her journal page. http://xiao-feng-fury.deviantart.com/journal/20911344/#comments
And if you ask her nicely, Xiao might let you suck her holy tits.
10/18/2008 Xiao is risen
Being rapture ready, Xiao has returned to defend Rejected Dreams from teh persecution and launch version 3 of her website.
Look out Obama
Xiao is determined to stop our new liberal overlord. The counter Obama revolution begins at her journal page. Like Victoira Jackson, Xiao is blessing the world with some choice quotes. You can marvel at her despair in her new signature "So long America"
Delete (almost) everything
Xiao has given into the constant needling by trolls, gays, non christians, liberal christians, moderate christians, conservative christians who are not as conservative as she is, her inlaws, her family, and God herself. She has deleted most of her "faith based works". She no longer responds to the constant flaming she so richly deserves. It looks like this lulzcow has be milked all the way through. Now all we will have to make fun of is shitty Tekken Fanfiction.
Exodus; Xiao-Feng-Fury, has moved to (the nowadays dead) Sheezy "art"
After leaving deviantArt in shame, she has settled down at the one website for people too dramatic for DA. She will continue her lulzy Gay crusade. It won't be too long until she is Raptured away from this site too. Maybe the troll community can help?
Go by her new page and say hello. She’ll love to hear from old foes. Here is the link to her new page: http://xiaofengfury.sheezyart.com/ You can also welcome some familiar faces. Looks like she is bringing her posse with her. Lol Link http://thezeroshift.sheezyart.com/ Xiao's army continues to grow. Her little darling Saintfighteraqua "aka I'm not gay; I am the endless source of the universe's gayness and enjoy drawing pictures of men in thier underwear", has join the Sheezy crusade. Say hi to little aqua at http://saintfighteraqua.sheezyart.com/ There, she proudly displays her "Proudly Disapproved by ED" banner on everysingle journal entry she makes (Hated by ED since '07 which is a lie. ED loves her lulzy antics.)
There, she continues to make lame art and argue with trolls. She no longer makes her flambait Christian spewings due to the fear brave troll patriots have put into her little brain.
Xiao's Sheezy journal is a useful source of facts. It asks important questions the Muslium loving, baby killing, queer loving liberal media is afraid to ask like:
- "Is my government rebate free digital converter a video camera that provides the NWO a direct feed of myself watching tv?"
- "Is Will.I.A.M's "Yes we Can" musical gobble session of Obama's penis secretly back masked to say 'thank you Satan?'? This one was banleted due to lulzyness.
- And a particularily ironic statement coming from someone who's immature fanart is "inspired" by magoo and animu
"What's up with all the weird things in Anime? IT'S NOT FOR CHILDREN, THAT'S WHAT'S UP!"
You can watch a fundie break down in front of a complicated and unsure world here http://www.sheezyart.com/journal/539514/ begining with her discussion about the NWO's plan to constantly watch people idly slump in front of their tv's watching crap no one likes. JUST AS PLANNED! Seeing as Natalie has no job right now (she quit because she hates selling to homos), she has plenty of time to get involved in the political process. She is gearing up to attend the San Antonio Tea Party where the IT department of an entire state in varying degrees of independence, medication, and employement, protest the government's use of the money they never were going to enjoy in the first place. http://www.sheezyart.com/journal/view/549402/
Natalie hates black history month
Uncle Ruckus doesn't have shit on Natalie N. Johnson of Texas. Nothing makes her blood boil more than black presidents and Febuary being black history month (instead of trying to make the lessons diverse and inclusive throughough the year, CUZ ITS HAAAARRRD) gives her a case of the double sads.
It must have been hard of Natalie in High School during black history month. For as we all know, silly civil rights just get in the way of black folks properly assuming their role under White Jesus and the people made more closely in his pearly image.
Xiao has slinked back to her shameful DA account for the ocasional response to the trolling her page still receives (and deserves). http://xiao-feng-fury.deviantart.com/journal/21330876/?offset=530#comments Come on down and check out this epic debate with a 16 year old baby smashin' slut name lilpixi who is noble because she plans on being a doctor who will save a bunch of lives and stuff.
How on Earth does she find the time to respond to trolls on her DA and Sheezy Art page? Maybe Dillard's let her go. On February 2009, Xiao posted a message of praise on the page of RejectedDreams, one of her two friends left on DA; (the other being fellow Christfag Danny-Paint) starting a new lulzstorm. It leaked new levels of fail out of her: She now only likes herself, RD, and God, and doesn't even care about her own family. Interestingly, she thinks that DeviantART and ED are sister sites, ignoring how ED hates DA due to how much fail it has.
One notable aspect is how Spleef, a Tartlet and ED supporter, wrote a message to Xiao condemning her bigotry. While long, it was NOT TL;DR since it actually raised a good point about Xiao's fail. Xiao's response avoided the points of the message, so Spleef posted it a few more times. Xiao continued to be ignorant.
However, on February 18, 2009, Natalie tired of Spleef blasting her with the harsh light of truth, and finally banned Spleef from her page, showing us all what a cowardly sellout pussy she is.
Spleef did an early April Fool's Day journal claiming to have converted to Christianity. Xiao fell for it and unblocked Spleef, showing that she will only accept a person if Christian. After the fact it was a joke was revealed, Xiao was annoyed and would pray for Spleef.
- For her flabby, bizaro world twin, see Adf-fuensalida
- For a musfag version of her, see Nayzak
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