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I TOUCHED HIS PENIS!! OMG is a forced meme from ebaumsworld. It all started Last Thursday when Kasey Hughes posted scans of her "friend" Christine Tomhuck's diary while taking care of her cats. Said diary included many lulzy quotes about the 16 year old girl's sex life, and her abrupt acquisition of new boyfriends. But, from known facts, she can't get a boyfriend as she is a slut.


Plot Summary

Christine Tomhuck was just an everyday normal 16 year old girl. She had never had teh secks or anything lulzy like that, but regularly fantasized about it and touched a lot of penises. Then she met this awesome dude named Justin Roberge. Justin is an awesome guy and loves this Christine girl A LOT. But after about half a year, the little bitch could only put out a handjob (WTF?). She describes Justin's penis to be wet at the end, apparently experiencing the wonders and joys of precum. "The rest of his penis was really soft and warm," she adds, and describes him as being "'hung like a horse' like Ian would say :)".

After a long time of not posting in her diary, Christine mentions nonchalantly that she and Justin have broken up, only to get back together again XOXOXOXOXOXOXO. Handjobs ensue. Due to an unfortunate incident, they broke up again, with Christine suddenly dating Kai, a Jew. Kai and Christine were separated, star crossed lovers who were not allowed to see each other because of Kai's controlling grandmother, even with Christine working hard at learning the Jehovah's witness ways.

At this point, it was apparent in Christine's diary that she was turning into a slut, as she would often give handjobs, and even kiss topless. They even went to a point where Matt fingered her ("Getting fingered felt so incredible!!!!!") as she was wearing a skirt with no panties. She commented that she "can't wait until we have sex, we are both naked and his PENIS is inside my VAGINA. It would feel AMAZING!!!" Their relationship ended somewhere between December 23, 2007 and April 23, 2008.

Her first entry about Matt was on April 23, 2008, which started with the opening line "Matthew is my boyfriend right now," with no further mentions of Bryan, Justin, or Kai. Before this entry, Christine summarizes that they've gone as far as anyone can go without actual sexual intercourse, with her going naked on top of Matt and humping him while Matt wore underwear. She "got him wet, which was embarrassing.". Later on, she stated "About 2 weeks ago, we tried to have sex, but it didn't work. LOL WUT. He put on an orange condom and I was on top, trying to put his penis in my vagina," leaving many Anon scratching their heads as to how they managed to attempt sex and have it not actually work. Her future with Matt is yet to be written, leaving an open ending to the legacy of Christine Tomhuck.

Indeed, her self written account of how she turned from an everyday normal girl to an 18 year old who tied boyfriends up to give them blowjobs, is a classic that every Anon should read. To this date, Anon is flabbergasted at the change that has happened in this girl over the span of 2 years.

Things to Ask Christine Online

Search and destroy:

  • I tie my bf to the bed when I blow him, too :)
  • You have such nice handwriting
  • How did it not work when u and Matt tried to have sex??? I mean u kno where ur vag is right

The Diary

November 6th 2006 *no school*

Today, Justin had to work at 11:30 - 4:30. Justin was at Wendy's at 8ish in the morning. So he called me, and I went down to Wendy's to meet him. We came back up to my house and we went downstairs. We just were watching MuchMusic, oh we held hands the whole way to my house. Well, when we were downstairs, he put his arm around me, and I layed on his chest and I put my other arm around him. His hand that was originally on my shoulder came to my side and he was rubbing my side and then he had his hand close to the bottom of my boob. I was afraid that he'd feel that I just have a built in bra on my tanktop lol. We closed together this Friday! Yay! Susan, the manager, caught us kissing goodbye in the morning. I love Justin so much!

Monday November 20th 2006

On November 3rd, Friday, Justin and me went to see Santa Clause 3 and we were in the top row and he put up the arm rest and we cuddled and he put his arm around me. I saw Bryan at Wendy's after the movie like wtf. Well, last Friday Nov 17th when I was working, Bryan came in with some guy friends and was obviously pointing me out. How embarrassing. Maybe he wants me back... I know he's still single, but oh well I love Justin so much it's amazing. We closed together last Friday, and worked for almost 8 hours together on Saturday. We drove Justin home on Friday when we closed. We were in the back seat and we were holding hands. Then I had my head on his shoulder and his head resting on mine, then he wrote a text on his phone that said "I want to kiss you." So I said OK, and then we kissed. Then we dropped him off and we kissed again and then when we both got out of the car, we kissed again. Here's a text or few:

1. Hey baby how are you? I miss you so much. ABout to take a shower text me back. I love you more than I love anything or will for the rest of my life. I love you love Justin xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

2. I am so clean lol. No I was thinking about you all day as well and now all night. Well goodnight beautiful talk to you in the morning. I need to get some sleep. I did not get a lot of sleep this weekend lol Night I love you love Justin xoxoxoxoxoxoxxoxo


1. OK that is random. I love you as well I want to make out with you as well text me back later I love you love Justin

2. I miss you so much as well I wish I could spend the night at your house I love you so much beautiful I wish I could hold you right now I love you love ya xoxoxoxoxoxoxo

3. I wish I could fall asleep with you I love you baby goodnight love ya so much I just want to hold you and kiss you love ya xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo <3 hugs & kisses love ya

Isn't he just the greatest boyfriend that obviously loves me a lot. He so wants to make love to me, it's so obvious wanting to "spend the night" and "fall asleep with you"
Our 2 months in 8 more days Nov 29th/06

Wednesday November 22nd 2006

Hey baby I wish I could fall asleep with you tonight and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you <3. I wish you were in my arms. Love you with all my heart. I can't wait to make out with you I love you so much goodnight. Sweet dreams. Well goodnight beautiful have a good sleep. I hope I dream about you. Love ya more than anything. Love your one and only <3 Justin <3 xoxoxoxoxoxoxo 10:42 pm

I hope that we spend the rest of our lives together. Love ya. Love Justin <3 8:12 this morning

Wendy's Christmas Party this weekend (Sunday) 26th! Yay :)

Thursday November 30th 2006

Today someone pulled the fire alarm so was all had to leave the building. Umm, tomorrow 40something secondary schools are coming, we have to go to 2 presentations. Yesterday was Justin and my 2 months together.

Text messages:

1. Happy 2 months beautiful. I love you so much I can't wait to see you again I love you more than anything in this world. love ya always.

2. Goodnight beautiful I love you so much and happy 2 months baby. Well have a good sleep. Just remember I am always thinking of you. I love you. Love your one and only Justin xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

3. Hey Baby I just woke up cause I don't know why but something told me to look at my phone, so I did and I had gotten something from ya. Well goodnight, sleep tight. I love you so much. Don't forget that. Love ya always. Love, your one and only Justin xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

In love with Justin <333

Sunday December 10th 2006

Today was my first band concert at the Springfell Rec Center. So Justin worked until 4, so I walked down to meet him, and then walked over to Pizza Hut, holding hands of course :). So then we came home, he got changed, and then we ate, then left at 5:10. We held hands on the way there and then we played. Justin and my family sat in the first row. Justin told my mom about how he isn't usually given close shifts, so he will take them when I have to close that day also. This Saturday, he took someone's close shift so YAY I work a long shift with him Thank God. Oh, I might go to a Cadet's Christmas dance this Friday, and then on Monday is my school's semi-formal, which I'm inviting him to. He wants me to switch schools and go to his, I would love to. And his school is so much nicer, but I'd graduate with people I don't know, and I may not be able to go to the Millwood Prom unless someone invites me. We're such an amazing couple, I love him so much I'm so happy to be with him. When he was holding my hand driving him home, he was nibbling my hand with his other hand. It was just so cute.

Monday December 11th 2006

Hey so I am going to Justin's Cadet Christmas dance this Friday the 15th. I can't wait, it will be the first time that we can make out and slow dance. I can't wait, it's 4 hours that I get to spend with him being cutsie and lovie dovie. You know that I love him so much that even though I'm pretty scared of sex, I would definitely make love with Justin, I was thinking of getting a condom or 2 from the health person Eddie (pronounced E.D) a girl. Well getting to have sex with Justin definitely the guy I have never loved so much in my life. I would feel so special to be with him as if we were one with our bodies moving together. I can't wait until it's really close to Christmas because I'm giving Justin a promise ring, so it's exciting, very exciting. Well I may also go to Kasey's before the dance, I'll talk to her about it. Well goodnight, I'll be dreaming of my love Justin.

Saturday December 16th 2006 *In love*

Yesterday was Justin's Cadet dance and they played a lot of slow songs. I am so happy because the song Amazed by Lonestar was the first slow dance that played. WE kissed so many times like during the last slow dance we made out. And then he kissed me a whole bunch of times. Almost every time that we looked at each other, we kissed. When we slow danced to "You're Beautiful," he was singing it and said it's true. Some guy asked me to slow dance with him. I was like I'm going to with Justin on the way home You're Beautiful Come on and he was singing it. We held each other's hands. And then we kissed, and then kissed a few more times and then started making out. Then he kissed me one more time when he got out of the car. I said "I love you," and he said "I love you more." When we were slow dancing I'd be pulling at my pants because they were too low, so Justin would pull them up for me. It was cute.

Tuesday December 19th 2006

Yesterday was my school's semiformal. Justin, me, Kayla and Sean went. Justin wore a suit and a tie, he was too cute. Us four got our picture taken for the yearbook. The first song was "I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing." When some of the slow songs came on, we sang to each other. We made out a few times, and we held hands practically the whole time. Just when we were slow dancing, I could feel how much he loves me, during one of the slow songs, he told me I look really pretty. I was like "Aww thanks you look pre... well I mean the same thing only in the guy way." So I gues I mean handsome. We made out in the car ride home too. It's so cute when he holds my hand, he runs his finger gently up and down, and then he held my hand with both of his hands. I so want to move out with him after next year if we're still going out, that would be like us going out for 1 year and 9 months.

My Sex Fantasy with Justin

He would gently lay me down on the bed in a dark room lit with candles. He would then slip off all of my clothes, bra, and thong. Then I'd hold his penis in my hand and kiss him, then I'd start rubbing his penis hardly until he became erect. I'd put the condom on and he get on top of me with his legs aside my hips as he inserts his penis into my vagina. He starts moving on top of me as he licks me from my bellytbutton, through my breasts and to my neck. He'd go back down and suck on my nipples. Justin then would reach orgasm, and his penis then thrusts further into my vagina.His semen drips out of my pussy. But where was condom? I grab his testicles tightly and rub them making me reach orgasm, I let out loud moans, enjoying every second.

January 15th 2007

For Christmas, Justin got me a necklace, from Charm Diamond Centers. It's at least a diamond look alike in the shape of a heart. I wear it everyday. There's a possibility of school being cancelled tomorrow because it snowed and had ice pellets coming down. So hopefully, there isn't school. Yesterday was my second shift on front. It was fine overall. It seems everyone is going to bed now, maybe I should too. Maybe, I gave Jenn my pink boots because I got a new, better pair to replace them. Though I may miss them, hopefully not, I just like footwear too much. like now, I want a pair of black, flat pointy dress shoes. Well I am going to the washroom then snoozing. Good night.

January 21st 2007 Texts from Justin

9:05PM Thursday January 18 I love you so much and I had a dream about us getting married. Well, Good night beautiful. xoxoxoxoxo (times 4ish)

1:25 Friday January 19 Wendy's was so good. i am full now. Are you working tonight?

9:54PM Friday January 19 Well sexy just wishing you a great sleep. Also, I love you with all of my heart. I will always love you. Have a great sleep. xoxoxoxoxo

5:18am Saturday January 20 Good morning love. I am about to go to work. I hope you have a wonderful day. Can't wait to see you tomorrow. Well, talk to you later (xo's times a page long)

7:12pm Saturday January 20 I love you to and text me when you get home ok

7:59am Sunday January 21 Well good morning love. I am at work now even though I work at 11:30. Well see you when you come to work. I love you with all my heart (xo's a page long)

January 31st OMG! He wants to have SEX!

Well, I am getting ready for bed cause exams tomorrow, and I was just wondering have you thought about us doing more than just kissing? Just a question. 8:25pm Sunday January 28

Well sorta I have thought about it sometimes but I thought you were against that sorta thing. 8:34pm Sunday January 28

Ya I know but since we plan to be together forever so I don't see a problem in it. I mean it brings people closer together. 8:39pm Sunday January 28

But just to let you know when we do decide to have sex then I want you to be ok with it and that I am not making you do it ok. You just have to let me know when you are ready. 9:13pm Sunday January 28

Well if you are fine with it right now I guess I better get some protection, right? Lol well I love you like you don't even know. I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you. 9:24pm Sunday January 28

Oh ok I am glad that I brought up the topic cause I thought we would never talk about it. Well now you are ok with it, we may be will do it sometime right. Well I have to get to bed and have dreams about you. I love you TTYL xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo By the way I am so glad that you will be the first time I ever do something like this with. I love you xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo Good night beautiful 9:39 pm Sunday January 28

February 15th 2007

Ugh, today was supposed to be the dance, but school was cancelled :(. Well, a few days ago Justin and I discussed when we should have sex. We decided that sometime between March 25 - beginning of April is when we will have sex, because his parents are going away to Africa. Justin thinks he's going to get fired tomorrow, Matt told him that :(.

Well, I hope that we do actually have sex, that is the plan at the moment. It just sucks because that won't be for another month. We talked about how if we could have sex with each other right then, we would. I hopefully won't have my period then.

Gotta go, TTFN <3

March 4th 2007 Sunday

On February 25th, I broke up with Justin. Yesterday he called me and told me to look at facebook, piczo or MSN. He left me messages saying how he has to tell me that he really wanted to tell me at work but he couldn't. He said that "he still loves me, and misses me." He asked for another chance and said "I will do anything to make this work this time." I still love him too, for some strange reason.

I imagine having sex with him still, our naked bodies pressing against each other, his penis inside my vagina, pulling the lips apart, causing an instant orgasm. My vagina will be letting out cream, Justin will be grabbing my breasts and I will be digging my hands into his back from all of the pleasure we're getting.

So Justin is my boyfriend again for the time being, we're going to try to keep it a secret from people at work though.

March 13th 2007

On Saturday, Justin, me and MAtt went to see Wild Hogs. Before the movie, Justin came over and we made out and took pictures. He layed on top of me on the couch as we made out.

Yesterday was even better, Justin came over 2 1/2 hours before we had to go to work. We played Xbox for a while and then we kissed a few times which lead to making out. Then we stopped because we weren't comfortable, so I then I sat on his lap with my legs on both sides of him and we started making out. Then we stopped, and Justin said let's move to a more comfortable position for you. And so then I laid down, and Justin laid on top of me with his arms around me. We started making out again, he took one of his hands out from under me and put it on me butt, and then later to my breast. He was actually grabbing it. Then he started kissing my nose, and all over my neck and licking my neck. It felt amazing.

At the movie Justin had his hand on my vagina almost the whole time. Then we held hands for the rest.

Unknown date

What I want:

Things that confuse/disappoint me:

Attachment: Note from Justin

I love the way you touch me, last night. It felt so good, like you had practice before. Baby I cant wait to be with you and close to your body. I love you with all my heart. Love you so much. Love, Justin XOXOXO

April 9th 2007

Yesterday, at 7:00, Justin and I went to see Meet The Robinsons. We didn't really pay too much attention to the movie, we were making out most of the time. Then Justin led my hand to his penis, I could feel it hard and could tell he wasn't small from on top of his pants. He was going to go in my pants and underwear, but I'm on my period so he only went in a little bit. Then he asked me if I wanted to go in his pants. I let him know that I'm nervous, and somehow I got in, and I felt his penis for at least half an hour, he is really big and he was erect. When I first started touching him I felt the very top and it felt wet. The rest of his penis is really soft and warm. We made out while I had my hand on his penis and then one of his hands went in my tank top and then in my bra. So, he felt up my bare breast, he took his other hand and put it on my cheek, and neck, and he put it under my chin, bringing my face closer to his. We went to Wendy's after. I went to the washroom and he walked in on me. Haha. Justin told me today that "You're so pretty," and I gave him the hand sign of a heart. When I went to the fridge he had a running start and hugged me from behind, the other day he picked me up and carried me around the store. He spanked my butt a few times and told me to move that tushie, and he wants me to marry him.

I touched his penis!! OMG

I love my baby Justin

19 more days and it's our 7 months together. I can't see myself with anyone else. I love Justin with all of my heart always. I care about him so much. His parent want to meet me, that's scary :O I think so. Well I know he has a larger penis than Chris lol, that's funny. But it's true, Justin is "hung like a horse" like Ian would say :)

April 20th 2007

On April 15th, Justin and I went to Swiss Chalet for supper. After we went to Wendy's got frosty's. He gave me an advil and got me water. Then we went to see Disturbia. This time we made out so much, he's getting really good at French Kissing, but he does shove my face into his hard. He touched my vagina, I think he was going to finger me, but didn't know where to insert his finger because he was pushing on my clit. Well I gave him a hand job again. I kept feeling his penis moving and my hand was getting wet, he was already erect when I started to touch him. He felt up my bare breasts again. Justin was breathing really heavy.

June 28th 2007 11:43PM

Wow, I can't believe I took such a long break from writing in here. Justin and I are not together. I broke up with him. He is a bastard. I don't want to remember him. Today, Bryan and his girlfriend broke up. I am happy about this because I still like him, but I'm sure that he doesn't like me. Sackvill High is huge, so it's hopeless, although at least I know that he's single and looking. That's what it says on facebook. I wish I could get an amazing boyfriend for once. Everyone is so lucky it seems, but not me :(

I want to finally meet my prince charming, my knight in shining armor, a guy like Edward from the book Twilight by Stephenie Meyer.

It all sucks, I want true love </3

November 7th 2007

My boyfriend right now is Kai. He is a Jew though, so I feel that it's a lot harder. He's technically not allowed to even talk to me. I love him more than I have every loved anyone in this world. He is my other half and it feels so right being with him. I am going to my neighbour's tonight because they are also Jehovah's Witnesses and I'm going to "study." It still won't be enough. I don't think for it to be ok to date. He bought me a pair of purple earrings. Because of his grandmother, he's not allowed to see me at school anymore. I applied to NSU about a week ago. Very exciting. I love Kai So much!!! :) <3

December 23rd 2007

Hey, many things have happened between Kai and I. We have now made out both completely topless, he's given me a hickey, he's sucked on my nipples, and he has fingered me. Getting fingered was so incredible!!!!! OMG.

I was wearing a skirt and no underwear. I loved being shirtless, no bra and making out and cuddling, laying down with him when he had no shirt on either. Like OMG Kai's finger was in my vagina!!

I can't wait until we have sex, we are both naked and his penis is in my vagina. It will feel AMAZING!!!

I also got him a promise ring, and gave it to him yesterday.

April 23rd/08

Matthew is my boyfriend right now, and right now I'm not sure how we're doing. I haven't been able to talk to him very much. We have pretty much gone as far as you can go without having sex. I was on top of him, and I had nothing on, his pants were down but his penis was covered by his underwear. I gave him an orgasm. I was getting tired and... I got him wet... which was embarrassing. We'll see how much longer we last.

May 31st/08

Last Tuesday, I went to Matt's and I tied him to the bed and I pulled off his pants and then his underwear. I gave him a blowjob and grabbed his testicles, I saw his hard penis. He tried eating me out.

I love his head by my vagina, we were both completely naked. I love his penis touching my vagina.

About 2 weeks ago, we tried to have sex, but it didn't work. He put on an orange condom and I was on top, trying to put his penis in my vagina.

I have now seen him cum twice now. It's really hot. Also Matt is circumsized (sic), and has a lot of pubic hair.

I want to have sex with Matt, I love being naked with him. It feels so amazing, having his penis touching my vagina feels perfect because it's very special.

Epic Quotes



—Christine's most famous line.

his LITTLE PENIS inside my VAGINA, spreading the lips apart causing instant orgasm, my VAGINA will be letting out cream


—Christine actually believes having secks would be like this.

Like OMG Kai's finger was in my VAGINA!! I can't wait until we have sex. we are both naked and his little PENIS is in my VAGINA. It will feel AMAZING!!!


—Christine, writing about yet another guy whose PENIS she TOUCHED!! OMG

I want to finally meet my prince charming, my knight in shining armor, a guy like Edward from the book Twilight by Stephanie Meyer.


—Christine, early in her literary career, describing her ideal man.

When he was holding my hand driving him home, he was nibbling my hand with his other hand. It was just so cute.


—Christine, after Justin goes OM NOM NOM on her hand.

Getting fingered felt so incredible!!!!!


—Christine, in a fit of joy, describing her sexual encounter with Kai, her illicit Jehova's Witness lover

I saw Bryan at WENDYS after the movie like wtf


—Christine, upon seeing an ex-boyfriend at Wendy's, where Justin took her on a romantic date after seeing... The Santa Clause 3.

I felt the very top and it felt wet. The rest of his penis was really soft and warm.


—Christine, describing Justin's penis, which she touched OMG.

About 2 weeks ago we tried to have sex, but it didn't work.


—Christine, describing her failure with Matt

I love the way you touch me, last night. It felt so good, like you had practice befor. Baby I cant wait to be with you and close to your body. I love you with all my heart. Love you so much.


—Justin's note to Christine, expressing her gratitude for touching his penis OMG

My Sex Fantasy With Justin

he would gently lay me down on the bed in a dark room lit with candles. he would then slip off all of my clothes, bra, and thong. Then I'd hold his penis in my hand and kiss him, then I'd start rubbing his penis hardly until he became erect. I'd put the condom on and he get on top of me with his legs aside my hips as he inserts his penis into my vagina. he starts moving on top of me as he licks me from my belly button, through my breasts and to my neck, he'd go back down and suck on my nipples

Justin then would reach orgasm, and his penis then thrusts further into my vagina. his semen drips out of my pussy. I grab his testicles tightly and rub them making me reach orgasm. I let out loud moans enjoying every second.


—Christine, describing her sex fantasy with Justin.
It remains a mystery how his semen can drip out of her pussy when they have used a condom.

The Aftermath

Someone on Failbook, claiming to be the diary-scanner, posted an update in the Facebook group dedicated to the historic Touching of the Penis that happened on April 9, 2007,(DOA), in which she claimed to not be able to take a picture of the diary with her tits next to it and a timestamp because she no longer had the key.

see, her parents, they called my parents. i'm not longer looking after said cats, and my parents took the key away.

and my mom was disappointed that i did it, appearantly, but mostly pissed that i was high when i did it. "you've broken a really big trust here" and so on.


—"Kasey Hughes", Failbook

Apparently Matt, Christine's boyfriend at the time of the diary's posting, dumped her not long after. Stating that he couldn't stand the thought of people knowing the things they did. And Christine's parents bought her a car to console her, defeating the purpose of the currently implemented punishment. The skank.


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See Also

External links


I TOUCHED HIS PENIS!! OMG is part of a series on


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I TOUCHED HIS PENIS!! OMG is part of a series on


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