Difference between revisions of "Malaysia Airlines Flight MH17"

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{{timeline|[[AOTN|Featured article]] July 21 & 22, [[2014]]|[[Dashcon]]|Malaysia Flight MH17|TBA}}
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[[Category:2014]][[Category:Events]][[Category:IRL Shit]]

Revision as of 21:54, 18 July 2014



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Malaysian Airline MH17 was a commercial cargo ship carrying 100 AIDS researchers that was either shot down by retarded slavs parading Putin's military equipment or a false flag operation by the Ukraine government to incriminate their domestic insurgency. The plane was shot down on July 17th en route to Melbourne by a BUK surface-to-air missile in a monumental firework display that resulted in a shower of charred remains spreading a nine mile radius and a local highs-chool chemistry teacher left cleaning out fallen debris from his swimming pool.

Some argue that a bunch of gross Slav revels without a cause were fighting over a piece of shit hunk of dirt that should be turned into the next Chernobyl, and blew up a plane full of non-Slavs. They thought about hijacking the plane, and pulling a 9/11 but gave up on that idea, as Ukraine is nothing but a shitty gray concrete apartment complex. Others suggest that the Ukrainian Army blew up the plane on purpose, hacked the Twitter account of the rebel leader who ordered the shot, and released a fabricated phone conversation which equated to an admission of guilt. Putin believes it was an assassination attempt on himself.

Everyone is wrong. Pilot Parker crashed the fucking plane.

Passangers

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The rain in Ukraine • Is mainly humane • from the plane • that left a blood stain
 

 
 

298 people fell to their fiery deaths. Of them, 80 were children. 154 were Dutch, 43 Malaysians, 27 Aussies, 12 from Indonesia, 9 Britfags, 4 Krauts, 4 from Belgium, 3 Pinoys, and one lonely Canadian. 41 are still unverified. This total does not include Pilot Parker, hailing from Parts Unknown.

AIDS Researchers

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Approximately 100 of the world's top AIDS/HIV researchers were on board the flight, heading to a conference in Melbourne. This marks a crippling blow for both homos and Afrikaans, as they realize that their only hope for survival relied on people who travel to Australia. Devout members of the Westboro Baptist Church are pleased and are expected to make a statement about how they were right all along.

Lightning Strikes Twice

An Australian family who had lost two of their loved ones on Malaysia Airlines Flight 370 hit the jackpot again and lost another one on MH17. Surviving members are expected to win the lottery in the coming weeks, only to die in a future Malaysian Airlines flight. By lottery, we mean lawsuit, and by future Malaysian Airlines flight, we mean a plane will strike their home.

Gallery

Wreckage

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Gore



Misc



Videos


Homecam


Captain Janks prank call MSNBC

See Also



External Links


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Malaysia Airlines Flight MH17 is part of a series on

Truth

Visit the Truth Portal for complete coverage.

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Malaysia Airlines Flight MH17
is part of a series on

Life

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Featured article July 21 & 22, 2014
Preceded by
Hungary
Malaysia Flight MH17 Succeeded by
TBA