Requests for adminship

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Requests for adminship, ("WP:RFA") is a page on Wikipedia where you too can become a basement-dwelling administrator. When requesting to level up, be sure you have enough experience points.

What happens

   
 
I think perhaps I'll go through semi-willy-nilly and make a bunch of people who have been around for awhile sysops. I want to dispel the aura of "authority" around the position. It's merely a technical matter that the powers given to sysops are not given out to everyone.
 

 
 

Jimbo Wales

Typically, a user nominates themselves or sucks a current admin's cock for a nomination. Any wannabe who runs this gauntlet will get raped and abused in every way imaginable. Every single cavity is probed. This goes on for seven days, which is known as "Hell Week" among the Wikipedos, however some chicken out before this. If the newfag survives this then they are promoted to Sysop for the further pleasure of the Wikipedophiles. Some sick fucks enjoy this, however most end up scarred for life. As such, RfA is a good trolling tactic for harassing your enemies while maintaining the appearance of being amicable.


RfA is typically a battle ground where users fight over who gets to have high power users in their guild. Perennial discussion topics on the talk page include crying a river over the fact that the pool of Wikipedos are getting more and more infested with AIDS causing editors and admins to quit, and screaming that the world will end because there are no newfags on the chopping block, and sacrificing babies in Satan's name to prevent this from happening. As this is a popular meme on the RfA page, one can improve their chances by running when it is empty.

At the end of a RfA, a bureaucratic fuck judges if the user is pleasureful enough to promote to an admin. Sometimes, a full tribunal is held. If the user has been raped more than 80 times, the RfA will most likely pass. Generally, if the user was gangbanged 70-80 times the RfA will pass, however if it is around 70 the bureaucratic fuck must use their discretion, by taking them out for a spin themselves. This standard has changed over time, and got lower over the years.

A typical RfA

Support

  • Support All of the below

Oppose

All of the below do not matter at all. In fact, fuck the rules! YOU'RE ALL ADMINS!

Requests for Bureaucratship (RfB)

Hosted on the same page is a page where users can become "Bureaucrats" [sic]. 'Nuff said. It is harder to pass, and users who pass get to decide the outcomes of RfAs as shown above.

Notable enemies of the state

Every now and then, a user makes votes with logic too advanced for the TOW users. This leads to conflict between the users who want to censor them and those who defend their freedom of speech, sparking much butthurt, votes for banning, etc.

  • WPFavicon.png Kmweber was a user who added the vote Oppose — I view self-noms as prima facie evidence of power hunger. to every self nom. This impeccable logic sparked the rage and bullying of the TOW admins. Kmweber was driven off but eventually came back.
  • WPFavicon.png DougsTech was a user who spammed Oppose — Too many admins lately on every single RfA. See the ED page for more details.
  • WPFavicon.png Keepscases~enwiki was a troll who opposed every atheist for displaying "offensive userboxes" on their page.

The Plan

  1. Revert vandalism
  2. Join #wikipedia
  3. Suck teh admin cock
  4. ????
  5. Profit!

Tips

At least 100 RfA's fail per year because of personal vendettas and the inherent risk of an eBay sale. Also, getting in a argument with someone pretty much guarantees that they'll pop in your RfA with and make an oppose vote. So when working towards a sock admin account, one must not make enemies.

Infamous RFAs

  • Chzz is a user who almost passed despite suspicions that he had been using sock puppets, however in what was probably the most stupid move a Wikipedo could make, he edited his own RfA using an abusive sock he had been using. His RfA immediately tanked, even his nominator withdrew his support. Chzz's sock was blocked, but Chzz was allowed to continue editing. We missed out on all the lulz he would have made if this sock wielding wikipedo did become an admin. See Pastor Theo and Law below.
PROTIP: Next time use a proxy.
  • WPFavicon.png Law was successfully nominated for RfA by WPFavicon.png GlassCobra. However, it was discovered that Law was actually The Undertow, a banned ex-admin; GlassCobra later acknowledged he was aware of the sock account when he put the RfA forward. Law was promptly blocked while GlassCobra had his tools ripped out for being the first admin to knowingly nominate a sockpuppet for adminship; however, GlassCobra's adminship was restored four months later following a direct appeal to Arbcom. LaraLove also had her admin rights yanked for helping her BFF Law win RfA.

See Also

External Links

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