tails gets trolled
tails gets trolled is the greatest comic ever. Some argue it is even better than Sonichu, though as far as webcomics go that isn't saying much. Though at first glance it appears to be a case of trolls trolling trolls and parody, the comic is, in fact, 100% genuine. tails gets trolled proves simultaneously that the author is insane and that trolling definitely works. The only REAL fucking problem is that about half of the damn comic consist in the characters trying to find a new plan.
The comic was created as a response from lazerbot (real name: Jinstine Cam), a 20-year-old aspie with art skills that put him within the top 10% of tartlets, to trolls and what he believes to be the best way to deal with them, which unsurprisingly is to slaughter all of them with the help of an edgy anti-hero like Shadow the Hedgehog. Lazerbot uses a combination of MS paint, an inability to spell even the most basic words, and a passion for plagiarism and copyright infringement that would put Bleedman to shame in order to cry about how people get made fun of on the internets, all while using his comic to write the greatest story of revenge, of a world where a "troll" is a "guy who walks up to you in the street and calls you a fag" whom you can then kill while wearing a Tails fursuit.
tails gets trolled began on 16 October 2011 as a critique on the idea of trolling. Lazerbot's biting satire and hilarious wit soon caught the attention of the goons at Something Awful and the EDiots at ED, where it has become a staple of everyone's daily lulz consumption. <s]>Of course, Lazerbot doesn't seem to realize that people are laughing at him, not with him. FUCK YOU TROLLS.
Chapter 1: Tails Gets Trolled
Our epic story begins with Tails calmly walking through the forest and either laughing hysterically (possibly at how horribly drawn he is) or singing "lolololololol". But little does Tails know that he is being watched by two evil trolls. The trolls step out of the shadows to call Tails gay, dumb, retarded, a hoe, and a talentless fox and he runs off crying. He turns to Sonic for help, who in turn suggests that they try to make peace with the trolls, while Shadow instead suggests to Tails that he flip off the trolls and tell them to fuck off. Tails ultimately decides to go with Sonic and lend an olive branch to the trolls, and, surprise surprise, the trolls refuse this peace offering and instead call Sonic a "talentless blue pokemon". Seeing as how negotiations have broken down, Tails then turns to Shadow. Shadow and Knuckles go back, call the trolls retards, kill them, hide their bodies and go off to celebrate by getting high and having sex with a gorilla. Later Shadow is confronted by another troll who tells him Tails is now the target of a troll organization. The two then proceed to get into a fight, which is soon after broken up by Mario, and Shadow goes off with Sonic and Knuckles and they all kill some more trolls.
The Moral: Bestiality and murder are a-OK, but trolling isn't.
Chapter 2: Trolls Attack
Chapter two starts with Tails fighting a troll and getting totally pwnd. After that, we see Bowser getting trolled, so he kills one troll by setting him on fire, then the other troll offers to suck his dick, but he kills him too. Then, because all shitty comics need a supergroup, Shadow assembled "The Troll Slayers", that consists of: Shadow, Silver, The Hulk,
some strange rat thing Teemo from League of Legends, Bugs Bunny, Mario, Luigi, and a guy with no ears, who explains to them that he cannot be trolled because he is deaf (didn't work for DestinyMew). They decide to lure the trolls out with a "justen bever" concert and blow them up. Meanwhile, Sonic joins forces with Eggman. The concert is set up and the trolls arrive, but when Shadow is about to activate the explosives, they show having Daffy Duck hostage, who Bugs Bunny reveals to be his gay lover. Then, Luigi betrays them and fights Mario.
The Moral: Ripping off things is fun when it's a gay agenda!
Chapter 3: The Truth
Mario and Luigi have a DBZ-style fight. Since Mario is a stereotypical fat fuck, Luigi wins. Shadow kills Daffy, which makes Bugs break the bomb remote in a fit of sorrow due to his gay lover having been killed, and Shadow kills him too. Sonic kills Eggman and goes off to fight the troll king who, in a brilliant and original play on words, is a literal troll who has a son with the body of a human and a trollface for a head.
The Moral: Wh... wuh... what the fuck.
Chapter 4: Deceit
The troll king tells Sonic he wants to kill him so that his son can rape his corpse. Then some other Sonic characters show up and get killed. The troll king kills Sonic and lets one of the other characters escape. He goes to Shadow, vomits blood on him, and tells him everyone is "deader than a black guys in a town full of racists". Then Mario tells them he and Luigi were only pretending to fight so that he could infiltrate the troll organization. The audience then dies from massive heart failures and/or brain hemorrhages due to amazing plot twists.
The Moral: Maybe eugenics is a good idea.
Chapter 5: Tails Gets Kid Napped
Luigi betrays the trolls and tries to kill the troll king, but the troll king kills him by calling him a cunt. Mario breaks with the Troll Slayers after he reveals he was just using them to realize his personal revenge against the trolls. Then, Tails gets kidnapped by another anti troll group composed of: Doug, Skeeter, The Trix Rabbit, Arthur, Batman, Chester Cheetah, Dexter, Hello Kitty, Kermit the Frog, Ronald McDonald, Spyro the Dragon, Vivian, Woodstock, Frogger, Leap Frog and fucking Pac-Man. They tell him about how Doug's dog died after being gang banged to death by trolls and about the history of troll town and thehdidjf- ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz...
The Moral:The dragon balls are not real
Chapter 6: Silvers Mission
The focus of the story then shifts to Silver, joined by Elmer Fudd and Rob (the guy with no ears). They decide to infiltrate the troll base by hiding under Trollface masks. He wins a troll-off, fails at talking to women, breaks into the base, gets discovered, and another big fight happens. Apparently you don't need ears to be one of the dragonborn and shout the words of power. Later, back in the main group, Knuckles gets an idea, but since he's not high enough to be smart it ends badly.
The Moral: If you troll someone hard enough they'll cum in their pants thinking about you.
Chapter 7: Mario vs King Troll
Mario has a flashback to when he and Luigi met their drug-addicted, white trash, troll biological parents, relishing all the fond memories. The rest of the chapter is exactly what it says on the tin, with Mario using most every powerup he has in another grandiose DBZ-esque fight, yet still for the most part getting his ass thoroughly kicked. Yoshi tries to rescue him when he is about to be killed by King Troll, only to have his tongue grabbed by King Troll and slammed in the ground together with Mario.
The Moral: Calling someone a "Ni**ER" [sic] will make their eyes bleed.
Chapter 8: The Neutral's
Mario uses a warp whistle to narrowly escape with his and Yoshi's life. Tails learns how to dodge bullets from Woodstock and learns the art of hand-to-hand combat from Batman. After Silver trolls the trolls into teamkilling, Elmer Fudd reveals himself to be a necromancer or some shit like that. Elmer then gets kidnapped in a plot to resurrect Dr. Robotnik and carry out the King Troll's grand plan. Wile E. Coyote then takes the rest of group into hiding to explain how a night of drunken debauchery led a couple of Looney Tunes (and Tom) to get Satanic powers.
The Moral: He totally stole the whole bit about the city of Gotham trolling Batman from SMBC Theater.
Chapter 9: Fuds Choice
We've all been here before: drunkenly stumbling into an occult ritual and being granted the superpowers to become living weapons in a Christian vs. Satanist holy war. Of course, everyone handles it differently. Porky Pig gets the worst of it, first having to face the consequences of cheating on his girlfriend with some thieving whore while getting drunk when he was supposed to be the designated driver and then having his entire church turn on him and murder his family when they find out about his freaky powers, but he seems to take it about as well as could be expected. Wile E. Coyote, on the other hand, establishes himself as the most rational one of the group, calmly analyzing his new powers while being able to calm down a distraught, psychotic Porky. Sylvester and Tom are mildly freaked out by their newfound powers when they apply them to Tweety and Jerry, but they learn to cope with them. Elmer is just kind of there but makes the call to save everyone else from getting shot at. Oh, and the reason the puppetmaster necromancers are called neutrals is that they get violent nosebleeds if they show any kind of emotion.
The Moral: Sometimes it takes a coyote to tell a pig what it means to be human.
Chapter 10: Silver's Plan And Tails Training
Knuckles victoriously returns after his plan succeeded, that plan being to get high, find the trolls in the forest (who were "trolling animals and stuff") and get high again. At the same time Tails is still training with Hello Kitty, Spyro and Kermit. Kermit tells him with the biggest monologue in the world about how he used to be a troll. Also, the troll king is trying to get Elmer to revive Eggman by telling him he will cut off his penis, like he did Justin Biber. His son suggest that they rape him to death instead. Team Silver plans to rescue Elmer from the clutches of the Troll King. Meanwhile, Pori is up to mysterious business.
The Moral: "Soon his butthole will be mine" - troll king's son.
Chapter 11: Wild Tempers
The Troll Slayers decide to spar with each other to get stronger, until Shadow beats the fuck out the Hulk and Knuckles, because he's fucking pissed and walks away. At the same time, Team Silver sets off to save Elmer Fudd, with Silver worrying about people thinking he watches porn. Tails continues his training by meeting with The Cheeto Man, who wants a fistbump before they start. Cheeto Man then lights up a fat blunt and blows Tails' mind by teaching him a Cheeto hadouken or something. At this point, Shadow is so fucking mad that he finds a troll village, charges his powers, and fires a gigantic lazer at the village, completely disintegrating everyone and everything. But Knuckles comes to tell him that it was a completely peaceful village unrelated to the trolls. Meanwhile, Tails has mastered the cheese hadouken while getting high as fuck with Cheeto Man. He then heads to Dexter, who tells him he's going to punch him in the balls, and gives him some technobabble shit before passing him off to Vivian.
The Moral: If you are going to use your Dragonball Z superpowers to destroy a troll village, make sure they are rally trolls first.
Chapter 12: Taking Action
The fight between Lazerbot and his brother's Self-insert characters continues and ends up spanning across THREE FUCKING CHAPTERS! The style changes from a rip off of DBZ to a rip off of Naruto and Avatar and Hellsing. They spend the entire chapter throwing shit at one another while calling each other faggots.
Fucking nothing. This is NOT Dragonball Z.
Chapter 13: Taking Action pt. 2
Gary is about to defeat Demaro, when Satan or something appears and eats him, allowing Demaro to attack the Trolls and the protagonists. Sylvester, Tom, and Coyote randomly start discussing the artistic merit of porn. The neutrals go to attack the Trolls in order to rescue Elmer Fudd, showing their army of cartoon zombies, including Grandma, Foghorn Leghorn, the penguins from "Madagascar", the fighting chicken from "Family Guy", Tweety, Jerry, Big Bird and a bunch of nameless dogs from Loony Toons and Tom&Jerry. Silver attempts to use murder as a pickup line to attract Blaze. Then they meet the troll who hacked his old account and kill him too. As the Neutrals kill trolls, Rob squares off with one of the more important trolls in a fight to the death.
The Moral: The record for most stolen licensed characters in a single webcomic has officially been broken.
Chapter 14: Puppet Battle
The chapter begins with a short little comic by Lazerbot, demonstrating that this isn't DBZ, got it? Afterwards, Rob and Hindo start fighting. The scene is interrupted when Sylvester and Tom start killing random trolls, having the same bitch-fests as the previous chapter. Silver is still a virgin Wile E. Coyote and Demaro start to get into a fight as well. We see how Road Runner was killed (no loose ends in this comic!), Elmer Fudd controls Luigi's sodomized corpse, and lazerbot becomes a troll and trolls his fanbase into thinking Rob dies. All in all, nothing happens.
The Moral: Remember what this comic was about? Neither does Lazerbot!
Intermission: Tails Gets Gay
This satire spin-off shows what our favorite web-comic would look like if it was gay do to comments from the horrible, horrible folks over at SA. Because it is not this KAWAII!!!!, it must be not gay.
- Because it's not part of the main series comic, all reaction images pulled from it will be in this gallery.
Chapter 15: the Guardians Part 1
Demaro and Wile E. are still fighting with their puppets, complete with lasers that look like bubble gum. Sylvester takes a bullet for his gay lover Tom. Silver and Blaze take an absence from this chapter, while Shadow and the rest of the forgotten characters who haven't been in some bloody guro mess try to think of more plans to get them there nasty trolls. Ronald McDonald goes crazy and starts to attack Tails, who is then saved by Chester Cheetah with kung-fu grip. Kermit the Frog and a few of the other Defenders show up and confront Ronald, who then escapes. During Tails' training, the sauce material is confirmed in a tl;dr speech. Meanwhile, Lazerbot has blessed his followers with an intentional 3-page filler comic as he writes the next chapter.
The Moral: Calling someone a faggot is a great way to cause an avalanche of drama.
Charter 16: the guardians part 2
We begin the chapter with Tom mourning over the loss of Sylvester as trollface prepares to shoot him. Silver steps in and stops the bullet with telekinetic powers, throws rocks at trollface, then promptly fucks off for the rest of the chapter to do other things. Frame-switch to Demaro and Coyote fighting still. At this point the fight totally isn't filler. "Mean while", Ronald McDonald consults Pac-Man for advice about his batshit insane freakout. Following the voraphile's advice, McDonald finds Tails and Chester "Cheeto Man" Cheetah smoking weed discussing how the philosophical properties it brings, along with troll morals. When asked for forgiveness, McDonald is told to fuck off. The rest of the chapter, almost half of it (8/21 pages) consists of Hindo and Rob's fight. Hindo pukes electric spiders at Rob, and uses them as a distraction to throw a lightning bolt at Rob. Rob falls in water and has a moment to think about his inner strength and all the people who believed in him... just like how Asperchu ended...
The Moral: Weed is cool kids, and it makes you smart! It's what Sonic would do (But cigarettes are still a no-no)! wakka wakka wakka
Chapter 17: Psychological Assessment
Lies, secrets, betrayal, and a massive fucking weed party. About half of the comic focuses on the "badass" defenders smoking weed.
The Moral: ...
Chapter 18: The Eye Of The Storm
Literally nothing happens here except a massive weed smoking party, gay sex involving Doug, some bestiality, and flashbacks.
The Moral: Anybody can come and go as they please at The Defenders' secret base.
Chapter 19: The Storm Part 1
Amy gets stoned and yammers on about how she met Sonic, how Eggman raped her in his rape chamber, and how Sonic had sex with her so he wouldn't be so mad.
The Moral: It's Genesis of the Lovehogs but more angsty.
Chapter 20: The Storm Part 2
We learn that Cheetoman is the true leader of The Defenders and is evil! Spoiler alert!
The Moral: Trix Rabbit has the hottest children prostitutes.
The brilliant author of this comic is Lazerbot, a 20-year-old tartlet with assburgers who specializes, unlike most tartlets and manchildren with computers, in drawing artistic representations of video game fanart in Gimp. Outside of MS Paint fanart, Lazerbot can often be found trying and failing to trace game art. As evidenced by his comics, Lazerbot is an expert writer, who tells a story of characters who may or may not defeat the trolls. The funny thing is, though, that Lazerbot has seemingly never actually been trolled, meaning his comics are either a way to give trolling victims a hugbox for them to run around and play in, or just another vain attempt to seek attention. It has been seen time and time again that using an abundance of copyrighted characters with a pseudo-animu art style and terrible writing is guaranteed pageviews for the author, but Lazerbot is leaps and bounds better than some "artists."
—- taskidog, commenting on Lazerbot's gallery
Last Saturday some brony known as Ponygiotis Vavetsikas hacked lazerbot's DA account and started uploading his own shitty version of Tails Gets Trolled, thinking this would gain him everlasting glory as a master troll. In reality, his version was unfunny garbage, and everyone just called him a faggot and told him to go kill himself. Lazerbot's pretend fans pretended to rage while pointing out the lameness of Ponygayotist's trolling attempt, as lazerbot just moved to a new account.
It was soon revealed that his hacking was a final desperate act after spending over a month trying to make lazerbot add dumb shit in his comic like references to the Aurora Theatre Shooting. However, even lazerbot wasn't so stupid to fall into the trap of this retard, and told him to fuck off. Finally, when he figured that he failed in outwitting an aspie, Ponygonohreia just hacked the account and uploaded his own comic.
Lazerbot's final response was this:
The Brother's Call
Finally, his brother who is even crazier than lazerbot, wrote the hacker the most retarded letter ever about how trolls should be burnt at the stake so that they can transform into an animal.
tails gets trolled is also remarkable for the fact that damn near every frame can be used as a reaction image, as the following gallery demonstrates.
Excerpts from the Comic
- LOL hacked. - The creator of tails gets trolled - LOL also hacked. - His, self made DA fanclub
- - The REAL creator of tails gets trolled
- - Started by his brother.
- - You can never have enough. This one is actually Lazerbot's.
- - Can't hide from us faggot.
- - No friends.
- His account on EDF2 - he got lured there briefly as a part of a failed scheme.
- Some jerkoff made a site for him.
- Something Awful Comedy Goldmine
- Something Awful Thread
- Someone is converting the entire comic into song
[GOTTA GO FAST!]
tails gets trolled is part of a series on
Visit the DeviantART Portal for complete coverage.
tails gets trolled is part of a series on
Visit the Trolls Portal for complete coverage.
tails gets trolled is part of a series on
Visit the Furfaggotry Portal for complete coverage.
|Featured article March 30 & 31, 2012|
Kevin & Kell
|tails gets trolled||Succeeded by|